Advice and tips on dating Taiwanese girls

Not only not PC (which I don’t give a crap about). Just ignorantly overgeneralized.

just be yourself and dont worry about trying hard or anything, she will think its really sweet and cute. i dont think the fact that she’s taiwanese changes anything. if you love her then it shouldn’t matter. =)

GooD LucK: :discodance:

capturehisheartandmakehimlov … review.org


I am no expert but don’t sell yourself short.

If you give off the impression that you are desperate and will pay for everything then she will take advantage of that.

In my relationship we earn about the same money so we pay half and half. I told her that if she wants someone to pay for everything then there are plenty of other guys. She didn’t leave and if she did then I wouldn’t want to be with her anyway.

Of course I treat her now and again but that is what makes it special and not just something she expects and not from asking. If you want to invest with the relationship with me it’s half and half (or fair according to your earnings or nothing)

That is just how I see it, girls these days have nearly the same opportunity and anyone I date who tells me it’s their culture I tell them they are free to date a Taiwanese guy.

Set your standards high or you could regret it in the long run. (This is just how I think and if you want to be the guy who pays for everything good for you, I have nothing against it! Just saying if you don’t like it stand up for yourself there are many many other girls if it doesn’t work out!)

Think carefully before doing this. Taiwanese girls are very fake and will suck you into Taiwan. You will be stuck here with no escape. Get ready to live in Taiwan for the rest of your life.

this is terrible advice and a pathetic way to live.

chinese women do like to have a degree of control and if you give them and inch they will take a mile… they learned it from their already mentioned nagging parents…things will only get worse as the relationship goes on. you can say goodbye to being a man if you start on this sort of path…

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Yes, agree with the above … and many Taiwanese girls have no clue about fashion and combining colors … djeez, bad advice.

Responses to dumb posts were sent from my Nexus 7, I hate Apple BTW, with Tapatalk 8

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just out of curiosity, everyone’s been talking about how girls expect the guy to pay… but im curious on what you guys think of this situation…

i’ve talked to this Taiwanese girl for like on and off for like 3 or 4 years. And finally met up with her on my latest trip to Taiwan. Spent like two nights w/ her going to Night Markets, walking around, and going to different food places.

She practically paid or wanted to pay the entire time. I was able to pay for like a few things… but not able to reach fast enough for the check usually.

What do you guys think of this?

Of course, I don’t know what the future will behold on us, we aren’t “officially” dating… but just curious what this means.

I’m a ABT so not really good at mandarin, we spoke Taiwanese, but her Taiwanese isn’t that great, there might be lost in translations but 80% ish or more we were able to communicate about our feelings etc.

She could be really rich.

She could be seriously, seriously grooming you for marriage.

She could have a personality disorder that expresses itself as a compulsion to buy stuff.

She could be a ladyboy.

Just saying.

Apart from the above possibilities, she may just be treating you as “the guest”; it’s common for a host to cover everything for someone visiting for out-of-town. If she saw you as potential dating material, she’d be letting you pay. The fact that she doesn’t suggests that, um, you’re not.

OR she could be expecting you to make more effort arguing over the bill. Taiwanese people seem to delight in starting WW3 over who gets to pay.

Just my :2cents:

Incidentally, just want to add a +1 to Lros’s comment above. You wouldn’t put up with your mates throwing a wobbly (after the fact) about some trivial aspect of a night out, so why put up with it from a gf? As said, they tend to do this because they learned it from mum, who criticizes dad for absolutely everything he ever does. It’s one thing to consult your mate over important decisions and take her opinion into account, but to allow her to make pisspoor decisions about every aspect of your life because there will be a tantrum if you don’t … that’s dysfunctional, adolescent nonsense, and you have the choice to either call them out on it, or walk away and find a grownup to date.

Okay, all these reasons seems interesting except the ladyboy one lol. Which i hope not… and im sure she isn’t.

Anyways, but i mean we did a lot what i would call dating stuff, from walking to dating spots, walking in the park. Many times i would put my arms around her, no flinching or uncomfortable. We even talked about future, family, likes/dislikes. I mean what are really the signs that i would be looking for if i go back to Taiwan more “permanent” basis? When we talked about how relationship wise, she felt it was far or long distance which i said you know if you think i’m the right guy just wait for me to come back. She was keen to the idea.

I mean look we both knew that these two nights could be only time if I don’t come back anyways. She doesn’t know a lick of English so coming to the states would be not ideal for her anyways, but she did say she will move w/ to US hypothetically if she married a guy who’s from America.

I mean really I’m more interested in what I should have looked for, maybe i can better analyze my encounter. I mean I’m not keeping my hopes up but i think she’s pretty chill to be with and worth pursuing.

I wouldn’t read too much into it. She’s probably just being a good host.

As for your specific situation… it doesn’t really sound like you’ve got enough reason to move half-way around the world.

I also wonder about the taiwanese dating etiquette recently. Like I am seeing a girl quite regularly in the last two weeks (we live on the same campus and see each other pretty much every evening) and I started to really, really like her. She has a bright mind and it is just unbelievable funny to spend time with her, she can make me smile a lot and vice versa. She certainly belong to the good girls and is in her mid-20s.
We are language exchange partners, we also line a lot (basicly she knows pretty much all the time what’s going on with me, just as I know about her).
It’s all very playful, so eventhough we have a lot of contact, there is no serious commitment yet. So no holding hands or anything, eventhough I tell her from time to time that I deeply enjoy spending time with her and she replies me the same. She also offered me to accompany to go to Taipei for my next visa-extension (eventhough I didn’t ask her to do so and my mandarin is good enough to get that done by myself).
So i just wonder what the usual strategy should be here. like in the west, I would feel some pressure to turn this into a relationship rather soon in order to avoid the friendzone. Yet in Taiwan, especially with a traditional girl, I have some doubts whether that would be the right thing.
At the moment I am tempted to just wait, let things go and let her decide to move it to the next level (if move it at all). Like there is no time pressure involved, as I am going to stay here for the next semester and in the future I have all the options to return to the island if I want to, since our universities have a good exchange program (and she is also very likely to come to my native country for study, she is already learning the language).

My last girlfriend was from mainland china and we started out in the same way. After a couple of weeks she couldn’t bare it anymore and asked to go home with me. Later she told me that I kind of suck and reading the subtle signs a woman sends out and that I might have already bored many women away by my reluctance to make bold moves (or any moves at all). So maybe I already know the answer, and just needed some opportunity to sort my thoughts here. ^^

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I can’t comment on how Chinese girls are vs Taiwanese girls in terms of dating etiquette, but I can help you on the Taiwanese part.

Try, asking her out on a formal date? Take her out to dinner. If she’s a cool/good girl, she may insist on paying, don’t let her. Cover the bill. If she still feels a little guilty for letting you pay, tell her she can cover dessert or can buy you a drink. Sometimes, they don’t like freebies.

If you guys are chatting and she’s willing to go out of her way to accompany you to Taipei for your visa-extension, why not use this opportunity to find a restaurant to have a nice dinner. Unless I’m reading the context wrong and you guys have already had date-like dinners?

If you guys are passed the dinners, try inviting her to a couples spot? In Taipei, a lot of couples go to the Love Bridge up in Danshui or if you have a scooter, take her up into the mountains to see the sunset (or sunrise). Or if you’re close enough to the beach, sunset or sunrise. I think what I’m trying to get at is, try inviting her to do more couples things, if she complies, you know you’ve got her hooked and can probably ask to be official. If she is a little unsure about spending that much alone time with you at couples spots, maybe she considers you as a really good friend?

Source: The gf is a local.

Dos: Be a good person.

Donts: Be an a-hole.

This isn’t rocket science. Treat her like a human. Oh, and don’t be another scumbag ex-pat that uses her and disposes of her like a kleenex. There’s enough of those here.

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That’s not my plan. :slight_smile: I have been through that pain with my ex-girlfriend, we even lived together for almost two years. At that time I was giving in to the pressure of moving together after 4 weeks of relationship, so I did give it a sincere and honest try. And I am not thinking of giving the pain of seperation to another person to soon again.
I think it will be smooth, she just asked me to take an earlier bus so we can have lunch together and I should bring money. Soo I assume she has something on her mind, and I just give in, it’s cool I think. I think I am just not the guy to take the lead in this things ever. ^^ if she should not be interested in a relationship that’s fine. It means having escaped the sticky boundage of Saṃsāra another time, and can be seen as a kind of victory on it’s own.

Don’t do it unless she got family money to mooch off of. Never had a good experience with Taiwanese. Maybe it’s just because I met most of them at clubs. Maybe it’s just me.

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if you like her just make the move. what are you worried about? Taiwanese girls are not active at all, so don’t expect her to do jack shit. i would say yes Chinese girls are a bit more upfront than Taiwanese. they are more straight forward, less refined… good if you like that sort of thing. i prefer Taiwanese girls. the gf i had when i was living in china used to cut her toenails out in public, and i’m sure thats tame compared to some.
you don’t need to worry too much about ‘traditional’ stuff. unless you are getting married, then you need to worry a lot.

if you like her just make it known. girls appreciate that. what they don’t appreciate is guys treating them like friends and hanging out with them when they actually want more.

That’s a major red flag in my book. I still do not understand how that’s remotely acceptable in the work place.

You should bring money? Isn’t that a given? Unless you normally leave the house without any money on you? :laughing:

No it was more like a ‘bring your money’ smile smile and then later 謝謝我的搖錢樹 But I think she was being fair, as indicated by ranlee she was quite happy to pay for the something small in the end. But since I a m not short on money atm I can go with that. In the end it was a beautiful day, yes, who knows what the future is going to bring, just take it down as a good experience. She is certainly not afraid of spending time with me, but might on the other hand be afraid of me leaving the country. :slight_smile:

Things are moving quickly these days! ^^ We spent a lot of time together, yet officially we are ‘language exchange partners’ and that’s it. So apart from spending time together we are not engaged in ‘serious relationship-things’. Basicly I am still traumatized from my last mainland china girlfriend (we broke up about half year ago). She was very very eager about marriage and dragged me into living together, seeing her parents and talking about children within less than two month after we first saw each other. Certainly we moved together too soon, before I could figure out whether I really like/love that girl or not (and I assume that 4-8 weeks are just too short to answer this question in a sustainable way, no matter in which culture). I am quite reluctant now to make such serious moves again.
Now with this girl things are looking better, as we are now only language exchange but certainly both know in which direction it is heading. Her mother visited our university the last days, so we got to see each other and exchanged a few words. In the next two or three months she wants me to visit her parents house. Since I do not want to rise too high expectations on her side (and especially on her family) after only knowing each other for a couple of months, how much of a bold move is it to visit the home of a girl here in Taiwan? Does that rise expectations of marriage? I do like her very much, but in case that after half year or one year we see that it is not working out, it is certainly not a too nice thing to disappoint her (especially if the family is involved).

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