I don’t think that the Taiwanese consider staring impolite.
Of course, I have only been here 29 years so perhaps I have missed something . . . . . .
[quote]I don’t think that the Taiwanese consider staring impolite.
Of course, I have only been here 29 years so perhaps I have missed something . . . . . .[/quote]
Wow 29 years! Please forgive my ramblings. I am not worthy. 
[quote=“Hartzell”]I don’t think that the Taiwanese consider staring impolite.
Of course, I have only been here 29 years so perhaps I have missed something . . . . . .[/quote]
While not all staring necessarily warrants criticism (for example, the little girl in Korea who stared at me for 20 seconds and then bowed respectfully), I think I’ll go ahead and use my own thought processes and experiences (in Taiwan, these would include the stare topped off by the middle finger in my face, or the stare accompanied by a malicious grin and “Helloooooo! . . . Attogaaah!”) on this one, with all due deference to your “time in service.”
There are the kids stares out of curiosity, and a simple grin will keep the kids happy… then there’s the stare for those screaming unruly temper tantrum kids at Mc Donalds, then there’s the thousand yard stare for looking at someone you don’t want to see… and of coarse the stare for those perky babes that walk doen the street…
Of course if I wanted to stare like the locals I’d have to pretend someone just stuck their finger up my rectum…
[quote=“Isaac”] It merely means that even though people are aware that staring is rude, there are two primary contributing factors, which I believe leads them to stare despite knowing that it is rude.
Many Taiwanese stare at foreigners, I am not disputing this. What I am disputing is that, educational level probably has less to do with these behaviors than most people think.[/quote]
Well here in Chiayi I believe that the people haven’t been educated that it makes foreigners uncomfortable when they stare - I class staring as looking for an extended period of time. I don’t think it has anything to do with their schooling, however school is an ideal place for it to happen.
Yesterday, I stopped at the 7-11 like I do every morning and a man in his 40’s raced to get in front of me at the register. After paying for his newspaper, he then proceeded to stand there and stare at me, walk a step backwards and continue to stare, take another step back and still stared. The girl behind the counter was bewildered, I turned to the guy and strugged my shoulders and said what? He went bright red, mumbled something and then ran out of the store. The girl was still shaking her head. I tried ignoring the behaviour and it didn’t go away. It makes me really uncomfortable.
What I will say is the behaviour here in Taiwan is positively civilised compared to the behaviour of people in Cambodia. The locals there tried to drag me off a motorcycle so that they could touch my skin. They also lined up on the beach to watch me sit and read my book. I was actually scared there. Here i’m just wary of people, I don’t like being followed so that someone can say hello, because you can’t assume everyone is a good person.
I read about 4 pages ago someone saying that if you’re blonde than people will treat you like a movie star here, what happens if you don’t want to be? Do you get a say in it?
Staring is common in places that see few outsiders. I’ve been stared at in places like China, Indonesia, Cambodia, Burma, the Philippines and others. In Indonesia I had group of local neighbors following me around and watching as I ordered food from a street vendor.
But I never felt threatened. I realized that these were not stares of suspicion, but of genuine curiosity. So I engaged them with smiles and friendly small-talk. Or I would ask them if I could take a picture of them (like the small crowd of starers in Indonesia). It was a good way to get to meet the locals.
If my niece or nephew (4 and 7) stared at someone “different,” my sisters would definitely tell them to stop it. I have never seen a parent punish a child for staring in Taiwan. Therefore I think that staring must be more accepted here than it is in Western societies. That said, I’ve lived in Asia so long (8 years) that I don’t usually notice staring anymore. What I still haven’t gotten used to is being discussed in Chinese right in front of me. When I’m sitting on the MRT, minding my own business, I really don’t need a trio of old perverts discussing my breasts.
I don’t think that the Taiwanese consider staring impolite.
I agree with Mr. Hartzell, but like to add. It seems not unpolite to stare at an outsider, something everybody instantly recognizes as diffrent from the majority and if this person is not communicating with you.
In China/Asia politeness like everything else is understood in a framework of rules.
For a foreigner there is only one rule “treat him as a guest”.
That’s nice.
But like any rules in Taiwan - they apply only in a personal encounter.
I had people stare at me for 5 minutes from close distance during a doctors visit. This counts as staring at an object, since the incounter is not personal.
Guys have you never thought about that “rules of conduct” like politeness is restricted strictly to personal comunication? More than that, you neverget anything for free. People who are friendly to me do this while telling me that they are friendly. This is disturbing for me.
For Isaac - read Mr. Hartzell’s book ‘Harmony in Conflict’. Brilliant!
The bigger question might be…why does staring bother you?
I just ignore it or just stare back for a bit. 
I think it has a lot to do with education (both family and school). Apparently, kids aren’t really taught manners here in school and they don’t spend much time with their parents either (which explains a lot).
Interesting.
None of this really matters.
Taiwan is going down the tubes and going back to china 
Kids stare at me, I give them something to stare about. Teach those brats some manners the hard way. Never going to rudely stare at another foreigner ever again. 
This thread actually reminds me of when my family visited Nashville, Tennessee about 15 years ago. My mom took my brother and I into a supermarket and people literally stopped what they were doing and looked at us. Of course, being all nice and friendly, they didn’t just stare; someone came up to us and asked us if we needed help. It happens anywhere you’re a minority…
My Taiwanese wife says she got stared at by the locals as if she were from another planet when she travelled through Mississippi seven or eight years ago.
If you want the staring to stop the best thing you can do is take on the calm, vacant countenance of a hindu cow. Stare back or stare somewhere else without a hint of malice or self consciosness. I am not kidding. If you do this well they will stop staring at you and even if they don’t you won’t care.
tell us, did she like it?
When the girls stare at you… just a give a smile or a wink (as someone else said before…)
When kids stare at me, point and then say “Baba Nee-Kan! Waigouren!” I always stare straight at them with a total look of amazement and say to my wife “Lao-Po! Nee-Kan! Taiwan-Ren!” This usually either cracks the kids, or leaves the kids confused and the parents cracking up… or esle they just think your an idiot and move on…
In truth though after 5 years the staring doesn’t really bother me that much anymore…
What Is till find annoying is when you’re sitting in the noodle shop and some Taiwanese parents send their kids over to sit at your table and practice English with you… I tell you I can’t wait to have my own kids in Taiwan… When the wife and I go out for a Romantic meal I can just send the kids to another table!
Cheers!
Daryl
this thread makes me wish i could read chinese… maybe i should look into classes.
Stare, stare, stare. Adults practise it covertly, teenagers are less skilled practitioners. Bloody Taipei Main Station area as well. How are you supposed to build proper human relationships with people who think you’re E.T. ? I’d just love to see them point at and comment on people in the middle of Brixton. This is one seriously insular country.
On a brighter note, I’ve always found the public toilets to be clean in Taipei. Sorry that’s the best I can manage.