Please, please, keep this up. 
Hmm. I’m starting to think that this has something to do with the pink skirt, and or sweater top. I once met a guy who could be turned on by almost anything in a pink angora sweater. Why don’t you buy your wife a short pink outfit and see what happens? And I think you could have a nice second income wrighting errotica, if you gave it a try!
So come on, spill on the details here.
What are we talking in terms of these “nether regions”, whaddawe got, 70’s bush, Christie Love crotch-fro, sparse and silky, shaved landing strip, clean Brazilian, or what???
Damn but that’s one freaky recurring dream! 
You say your pillow is dry in the morning, and I’m sure that’s a relief, but what of the missus, is she smiling coyly? Is she a fan of Jolin? Could this not be some evil witchcraft at work? Think The Manchurian Candidate, but with a pleasant ending.
Do you have a cat? Is it female? Is it purring and smiling at you in the morning?
I’m trying to help, man!
HG
Are you talking to me or my unconscious? Just kidding. It’s now been several nights since I licked Jolin. I can’t say I’m sorry to see it all end.
Thanks housecat, but I think I have to rule that one out. I’m not turned on by Jolin, the dreams, or any of the tacky outfits she wears in the dreams – and come to think of it some of those outfits were pretty damn tacky. The other day for the hell of it I thought of the dreams and tried to see if I could well, let’s just say it didn’t do anything for me and I had to turn to happier thoughts. So there you go. Oh and her panties were pretty normal (when she wears them) – a bit on the skimpy side, but just plain old white cotton.
I just knew someone was going to go and make this all vulgar. If you must know, in the dreams it’s sort of a Goldilocks thing. And by that I don’t mean peroxide. I mean it’s neither too long nor too short, but just right. It’s always a bit more than I expect she’ll have at first though, if that makes any sense. I hate to say this, but it’s actually kind of cute.
[quote=“Huang Guang Chen”]Damn but that’s one freaky recurring dream! 
You say your pillow is dry in the morning, and I’m sure that’s a relief, but what of the missus, is she smiling coyly? Is she a fan of Jolin? Could this not be some evil witchcraft at work? Think The Manchurian Candidate, but with a pleasant ending. Do you have a cat? Is it female? Is it purring and smiling at you in the morning?
I’m trying to help, man!
HG[/quote]
Thanks. At first the missus thought it was hilarious, which threw me off because I really hoped she’d appreciate how strange and disturbing all this was. But as the dreams continued, she did start thinking it was weird, you might even say by the end she found it a little frustrating. She’s not a fan. Nor is she in the same bed with me – of late I’ve been sleeping in a separate room because the missus is with the baby. So that rules out “sleepeating.” Maybe I’m lonely or something. But why would that manifest as me repeatedly going down on Jolin? I don’t have a cat, but interestingly enough, cats constantly fuck outside at night. And before you say it, yes I know there could be a connection there, but why Jolin? Evil witchcraft hmm. I have not ruled out possession. But does that make me her succubus?
And before anyone asks, here are some of the other questions I’ve fielded.
Q: What is your favorite Jolin song?
A: I can’t name any.
Q: In your dreams is it “missionary” oral sex or does she sit on your face or change positions?
A: One time I ate her reclining on a wall and one time we started while she was standing up, but otherwise, it’s all been “missionary.” That’s just how she wants it.
Q: Does it feel all dirty to do that? (a Taiwanese friend asked this)
A: Not in the least. Actually, it’s incredibly romantic and passionate.
Q: Does she come every time?
A: I sure hope so. Seriously, that doesn’t ever really seem to be the point.
Q: Do you think this is somehow all symbolic of your relationship with Chinese culture?
A: You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.
Q: Do you think her second album was better than the first?
A: I really can’t say. But the second dream was definitely better than the first, and the fifth topped them all. And when I say better, of course I mean for her.
When I told a taxi driver about the dreams, he said it’s obvious that I really do like her. So maybe that’s it. I can’t stand Jolin, but I’m her biggest fan.
Oh man, I just can’t get any work done after I read your posts.
Oh god, look out the next leery Taiwan taxi driver I meet, you are in for one fucker of a tale all about my mate, smell, and how he keeps dreaming of Jolin and her tasty bits!
Actually, if we spread this around enough, we could force some sort of televised meeting. "here he is, the man who . . . "
HG
You may want to seriously consider a user name change…
Would it really behoove you next time to take a camera ?
The driver was patient enough and suffered through my atrocious Chinese (I’d also had a few beers), but he did double check with “是你對她 … 不是她對你.” Then he nodded his head thoughtfully and said, “你喜歡她.” There were a few other people in the taxi.
Now you’re gonna give me nightmares. I do not ever want to meet her. I think it would be really weird and uncomfortable. The prospect is even a little frightening. There are more things in heaven and earth, Huang Guang Chen, than are dreamt of between Jolin’s thighs. I mean what if there was a mutual sense of déjà vu or the sudden memory of a past life where I was her sex slave or I realize I really do like her or some fucked up shit like that?
Why would I want to do that? After all, I didn’t smell anything. In fact, I don’t usually recall scents of any sort in my dreams. I don’t really recall taste either, but in these there was a definite tactile sensation (as well as moisture – she was pretty wet). I will think about changing my “location,” though.
I suppose it might broaden her fan base, even if I’m still undecided. I’m hoping there isn’t a next time – it has really freaked me out. Of course it’s probably not helping that my friends keep asking and I keep talking about it.
Guess what one friend of mine told me today. She said Jolin really does have a lower back tattoo - sent me a picture, but I can’t remember if it was the same tattoo from the dream where I flipped her over.
The bigger question is - has your Chinese calligraphy improved any?
I presume you mean this in the abstract sense? Because in the real world, people laugh at the way I write the number one. But it’s not like I can march abstract oral proficiency into an art gallery for appraisal.
It does raise an interesting possibility though: what if Jolin’s mission is not to entertain, but to educate? But I don’t think this explanation works either. In the dreams she never tells me how she wants it, nor do I offer to teach her any Latin terms. Maybe she isn’t getting it the way she really needs it; I’ve certainly never given it the way I dream it. She just wants it and wants it very badly – we both do – and the urgency and intensity and finality of it has no parallel in any of my earthly experiences. It’s all-consuming, exquisite, almost sublime. At least for her. It’s like for a few hours at a time there is no other reality but me giving her head. BTW, did I mention how loooong these dreams were?
EDIT: Since several friends have asked, it probably was not hours – of course I have no way to judge the actual amount since time passes strangely in dreams. Suffice it to say it seemed like an awfully long time in the dreams – far, far more than I’ve ever actually spent engaging in said activity.
Damn!
The thread has been quiet for far too long.
STG> Give us an update!
Have those dreams intensified or subsided?
[quote=“Josefus”]The thread has been quiet for far too long.
STG> Give us an update!
Have those dreams intensified or subsided?[/quote]
Thanks for your concern. There was only one more (#6), but things have been quiet for a few weeks. Nothing to tell, really. She and I were walking on a beach somewhere (I have lots of dreams about beaches – yeah I know, hahaha). We weren’t really saying anything, just walking and smiling and holding hands. Then she stopped and we turned to face each other and I realized we were completely alone on the beach. If you must know, she was wearing a bikini top and a sarong.
Then my dog started barking and woke me up.
You ever wake up in the middle of a dream (or in my case the beginning) and remember the dream crystal clear? Well, just before I woke up she was looking into my eyes all sultry like and I knew exactly what she wanted. The image is actually kind of haunting, burned into my consciousness. Sometimes just the memory of it brings back the same feeling from the dream: a certain quickening of breath and pulse that accompanies the unspoken understanding of what must be done and is now imminent. Most likely I was gonna eat her right there on the beach, sandy cheeks and all.
Maybe my dog knew I was in trouble and saved me.
You know what, though? People have been constantly sending me Jolin stuff - songs, pictures, links to videos, etc. I have one friend who is convinced I will find the answer if I dig deeply enough (another friend sends me Rainie Yang junk, insisting that she is better like it’s some kind of popularity contest – and she’s unimpressive in the extreme). Anyway, I still don’t have any answers, and I haven’t thought much about it after the dreams stopped. But I did check out some of Jolin’s stuff - call it morbid curiosity. Anyway, well, I don’t know how to say this, but I guess maybe she’s not as horrible as I always thought she was. And sometimes I find myself missing her.
Wherever she is, I hope she’s happy.
Damn dogs. They hate when you get a pussy.
[quote=“smell the glove”]Anyway, well, I don’t know how to say this, but I guess maybe she’s not as horrible as I always thought she was. And sometimes I find myself missing her.
Wherever she is, I hope she’s happy.[/quote]
:bravo:
We need to know how she’s been sleeping. I mean, did she suddenly drop everything and race to the cot to see her mystery foreign tongue? I think it is within our reach. Obviously finding out if she has been hooked on Smell’s oral ability would be much trickier to explore.
HG
So after several weeks’ hiatus, Jolin made another one of her nocturnal visits. This time she was crying and waving good-bye to me at the airport. Funny thing is, on the airplane, she was sitting in the seat next to mine, and it was like we’d never met.
I guess this is as good a time as any to mention that I’m leaving Taiwan. I got a job in America, so after sixteen years, I’ve decided to move on, lock stock and barrel. Who knows if it will turn into something permanent, lead me back here, or God knows where.
But it all makes sense now.
I started having the dreams around the time I applied for the job – didn’t think I’d get it, but it was the first time I really considered leaving Taiwan for anything longer than a few weeks on a beach and such. It probably isn’t unusual to say this, but Taiwan and I have had a love-hate relationship. What I didn’t like I detested, but what I liked I loved passionately – there wasn’t a whole lot of middle ground, even though the loves outweighed the hates. So yeah, the crowds and noise and pollution and humidity and traffic were often unbearable and exasperating. But I also made lifelong friends and traveled all over and ate incredible food and had surreal experiences and learned some Chinese and hung out on f.com and could’ve saved more but did okay and ended up with a wife and two beautiful children (or is that beautiful wife and two children).
So perhaps Jolin was a metaphor. I detested the tacky, off-key, full-of-herself, English-challenged, money-grubbing, princess of superficial surgeries. But I also loved her deeply. I’m only now beginning to realize how much, and I like to think that for a time she loved me too. Maybe sometimes I tried not to like her, found things to criticize, judged against standards that just didn’t apply. I’m not being a cultural relativist or saying Jolin is any good or anything. I’m just saying that when I listened, really listened for the first time, I found out that she wasn’t all that bad. To me, Jolin is like Taiwan: to be appreciated in all her naked glory, and eaten raw.
Drink deep, my friends. It’s just a taste, and it might not come this way again.
By the way, I’m pretty sure that, at the airport and on the airplane, she wasn’t wearing any underwear.
:roflmao: :bravo:
[quote=“smell the glove”]So after several weeks’ hiatus, Jolin made another one of her nocturnal visits. This time she was crying and waving good-bye to me at the airport. Funny thing is, on the airplane, she was sitting in the seat next to mine, and it was like we’d never met.
I guess this is as good a time as any to mention that I’m leaving Taiwan. I got a job in America, so after sixteen years, I’ve decided to move on, lock stock and barrel. Who knows if it will turn into something permanent, lead me back here, or God knows where.
But it all makes sense now.
I started having the dreams around the time I applied for the job – didn’t think I’d get it, but it was the first time I really considered leaving Taiwan for anything longer than a few weeks on a beach and such. It probably isn’t unusual to say this, but Taiwan and I have had a love-hate relationship. What I didn’t like I detested, but what I liked I loved passionately – there wasn’t a whole lot of middle ground, even though the loves outweighed the hates. So yeah, the crowds and noise and pollution and humidity and traffic were often unbearable and exasperating. But I also made lifelong friends and traveled all over and ate incredible food and had surreal experiences and learned some Chinese and hung out on f.com and could’ve saved more but did okay and ended up with a wife and two beautiful children (or is that beautiful wife and two children).
So perhaps Jolin was a metaphor. I detested the tacky, off-key, full-of-herself, English-challenged, money-grubbing, princess of superficial surgeries. But I also loved her deeply. I’m only now beginning to realize how much, and I like to think that for a time she loved me too. Maybe sometimes I tried not to like her, found things to criticize, judged against standards that just didn’t apply. I’m not being a cultural relativist or saying Jolin is any good or anything. I’m just saying that when I listened, really listened for the first time, I found out that she wasn’t all that bad. To me, Jolin is like Taiwan: to be appreciated in all her naked glory, and eaten raw.
Drink deep, my friends. It’s just a taste, and it might not come this way again.
By the way, I’m pretty sure that, at the airport and on the airplane, she wasn’t wearing any underwear.[/quote]
Well, that’s just beautiful, Smelltheglove. And guess what? when you leave, Taiwan will be right there on the seat next to you, still mysterious and passionatly alluring. That’s cause you can leave Taiwan, but Taiwan never leaves you.
Good luck to you! I wish you all the best.