If you could be a tree, any tree, what kind would you be? and why?


#581

watercress is not a tree.

Today I am a podia tree.

my feet feel great.


#582

Today, I am a box elder… that must be what I am today… I am sure of it, aren’t you?


#583

Today, I am a plane tree. Yippee!


#584

Today, I am either a french fry or lasagna tree… know the difference?


#585

Triffid


#586

I DON’T KNOW WHAT KIND OF TREE I AM TODAY!!! Should I be worried?


#587

I wood be.


#588

Thanks to the support and advice of superking, I have determined that TODAY and ONLY TODAY, I am a “Hello, I am Il Doge” tree! A rare and virtuous branch of Sicilian nobilitree! So there! Take that peasantree! hoooo hooo hahahahahahahah haaw hahahahw hahahw gufffawwwww ahahahahah


#589

I’m sooooo treered…


#590

Today, my vote goes for Elm.


#591

Today I am mired in hisTREEonics. There are a lot of people I really should tell to go fuck themselves and I’m always too… something… to really let them know. I mean, just cos I am easy going doesn’t mean you need to treat me like shit.


#592

I broke one of my branches. :aiyo:


#593

What exactly do you mean by “broke one of my branches?” Is that like a moral failing? Did you stumble metaphorically? Did you overreach and become overweening? overwhelming? too doughty for your own good? Did you finally crack? splinter? became infested by nut-crazed squirrels? home to batty bats? a source of succor to whimsical owls?


#594

Er, no.

I need a story. ‘Fell on my arse in the shower and snapped it like two twigs covered in meat.’ is not very exciting. I told my friend’s kid I broke it doing maths problems.


#595

A weeping willow over a pond of koi fish, with rocks and sand above my roots.

No carving on me either :fume:


#596

[quote=“Ermintrude”]Er, no.

I need a story. ‘Fell on my arse in the shower and snapped it like two twigs covered in meat.’ is not very exciting. I told my friend’s kid I broke it doing maths problems.[/quote]

You snapped your arse in two? Mine is already twain. And people believe you broke your arse doing math?

I knew a teacher in Taiwan who went for laser surgery to get rid of some pock marks. She told the kids she had a scooter accident instead of the truth. BONK ers.


#597

My branch, silly. I already have one of those modern ‘two section’ arses.

The 6 year old believed it. He was doing his maths homework at the time.


#598

Where I come from, the term ‘splitarse’ has popular currency among men of a certain disposition, meaning women in general. The etymology should be fairly clear, I trust.

I’ve decided I want to be one of these:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inga_edulis

It makes beans. And they taste of ice-cream. Apparently. What’s not to like?


#599

Where I come from, the term ‘splitarse’ has popular currency among men of a certain disposition, meaning women in general. The etymology should be fairly clear, I trust.[/quote]

Gosh! Yet again, flob educates me. Not … elegant. :laughing:


#600

No… elegant it is not… but? what kind of tree would that experience make it? to be made? by an experience into a tree? if you get my drift… bonzai! bonsai!