If you could be a tree, any tree, what kind would you be? and why?


#661

Today, I am a Rive Gauche tree, oh yes, that is what I be!


#662

Today, I am a tree that needs to lose some of its branches. A little overeating on a pleasant vacation has made me a flabtree! oh no!


#663

Today, I am a foil a terrorist attack tree. Yup. That’s me. Today only. Enjoy it while it lasts.


#664

Today, I am a Silent Tree. I intend not to say a word, nope, nary a word out of me.


#665

I saw this thread a few days ago. Last night, I had the weirdest dream. In my dream, I was gas-powered chainsaw and a 500-pound bear went into Home Depot and bought me. He took it home to the woods, filled me up with some gas and pulled the cord to start me up. Then he chopped down 4 trees… then I woke up confused.

What would Freud say about my dream?


#666

That’s Fred not Freud.

Yes, I see… I see… and how did the thread make you feel?

I am listening… yes, the unconsciousness awakes… I see…

Inner Voice: Oh, I’ll just bet you were. Compensation? for the insecurities of the small?

Well, at least, it was not a 500-lb tuna.

Aha! You see! The home as a depot… a transient point of unlimited destinations and yet not a haven, a refuge but rather a starting point to somewhere else… interesting…

You feel as if you are prostituting yourself? Are you a teacher in an English-language kindergarten?

That is he “took” you in the middle of a crowd of faceless/nameless/unidentified individuals.

That is probably nothing more than poor digestion.

Hubba hubba!

Fears of castration.

You are now officially bisexual and have been given dispensation to play for both teams.

There! Happy? or, more important, SATISFIED?


#667

I would like a show of hands. How many people think that, today, I should be an anchor baby tree? On the other hand, how many think that I should be an uncensored porn tree? Hands where I can see them!


#668

That’s Fred not Freud.
[/quote]

Fred, I was referring to Freud, not Fred.

(Freud as in Sigmund Freud, or “Siggy” as we like to call him here) :slight_smile:


#669

[quote]Fred, I was referring to Freud, not Fred.

(Freud as in Sigmund Freud, or “Siggy” as we like to call him here) :slight_smile:[/quote]

Sigh… and some fell on stony soil… :doh:


#670

[quote=“fred smith”][quote]Fred, I was referring to Freud, not Fred.

(Freud as in Sigmund Freud, or “Siggy” as we like to call him here) :slight_smile:[/quote]

Sigh… and some fell on stony soil… :doh:[/quote]

I don’t know why, but when I read that, I suddenly have this
image in my mind of Sigmund Freud slurping a a big bowl of
Taiwanese beef noodles. Very strange, considering Siggy was
a vegetarian.


#671

I guess this conversation would make me a psyche tree, right?


#672

[quote]I don’t know why, but when I read that, I suddenly have this
image in my mind of Sigmund Freud slurping a a big bowl of
Taiwanese beef noodles. [/quote]

Where’s the beef? What’s your beef?

[quote]Very strange, considering Siggy was
a vegetarian.[/quote]

How do you know?

Where is the causiTree?


#673

Today, I am an apocolocyntosis tree. Yup. That’s me or rather that is I.


#674

Today, I am an empirical evidence tree. That is said with great veracity.


#675

Today, I am a tired tree. Every leaf on my trunk feels as if it weights 200 tons. Oh the onerous burden of all of this foliage… I think that I will have to cut down on carbs and engage in more photosynthesis… Woe… These heavy boughs… these weighty branches… these tired twigs… these pudgy petioles… Oh woe! Alas!


#676

It doesn’t matter what tree you are as long as your are true.


#677

Today I have canopy shyness.


#678

And, how do you feel about that? why? I’m listening…


#679

Today, I am a why? why? WHY!!! Tree. For FFFF’s sake, get your sh** together and stop “leaving” a mess for me to clean up. Ya hear?!


#680

Today, oh it just had to be, I am a Jazz Hands tree. How embarrassing!