I always enjoy when people just stop dead in front of me causing me to crash into them
Like they are the only possible people that could be on that same sidewalk.
Bonus points when they do it at the top of an escalator.
Just got a zombie now approaching the turnstiles. Makes me remember I’m pretty used to it. What’s actually been more of a concern for me is that I don’t unconsciously act like a zombie when I go back home. People can be less than patient with it in NYC
TAipei is a major city. And Asians don’t smile at each other without good reason. So it appears to be kinda tough.
Was in a crowded bus (remember those? , think they are rarer now) and i thought of a joke so I chuckled slightly to myself. Within moments found the area around me widen considerably. People thought I was cookoo. Pretty sure it wasn’t the BO, used Deodorant.
There is to be no wanton smiling or chuckling on public transport you hear?
One fine day there is old lady, she was pretty wearing bright red lipstick and pushing stainless cart I think she’s heading to market so I smiled to her and greet her. After that we always greet and smile to each other.
My new hobby is to walk correctly towards people that are looking down and staring at their phones expecting me to get out of the way.
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Mine is to walk in a silly fashion towards and away from people (sorry I couldn’t resist).
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This used to drive me nuts! And it’s always your fault for daring house the sidewalk. One of the many reasons I moved out of the city center.
For a major city, Taipei is still imo pretty friendly. And you don’t really get the “oh I’m from Taipei” superior vibe from people like other cities. Go to NY, Paris, London, Rome, Beijing, Shanghai, Seoul and and other major city and they have this vibe. And not just against people from other countries, but within people from other places within their own country.
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It’s Skydragon city!
this.
they do see you, they just pretend they don’t so you will have to move for them. i really don’t get this passive aggressiveness thats so common here. i can play that game too! like on the metro i’ve noticed people slyly trying to steal my place when its crowded. hey if you behave normally we can both have a comfortable place to stand, but trying to steal my place? no chance, i ain’t moving an inch.
99% of Taipei is friendly. One time, I was waiting at a stop light on my scooter and a lady had a big box of fruit. She stopped and gave me a guava - just because. I find that if my attitude is good, and I’m approachable, I get the same back.
Another time a taxi tried to take me out on DunHua road. It was raining cats and dogs and he was pissed that I was in the way, so he went beside and swerved towards me with a glare to force me off the road. I really don’t know what kind of upside he was thinking about in that situation. At eye contact, I think I frightened him. I do drive like a grandma in the rain but I am a grandma.
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I am a Taipei native and have lived in this place for all 21 years of my meager existence. I’m pretty chatty if you approach me for directions or to complain about the weather, but I almost never initiate a conversation with someone I don’t know in a public setting unless absolutely necessary.
I don’t just randomly smile and nod at people unless they’re thanking me for holding the door open or apologizing for bumping into me etc. If someone makes eye contact with me then I’ll smile a bit and nod, but most of the time I’ll just stare at my phone/Kindle/the floor.
Greeting passers-by is just not something I grew up doing, and I swear this isn’t because we’re unfriendly. It’s 空気が読む (“reading the air”) at least for me. I don’t want to force anyone into acknowledging my existence in a shared space. Also yes, I am worried about bumping into/people labelling me as a weirdo. Weirdos can kill.
I will admit that sometimes there is a microaggression-towards-white-dudes thing going on (some Taiwanese men are pretty hostile towards foreigners), but that’s an entirely different issue.
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That is one amazing opening up about who you are. You knowingly or unknowingly explained and described Taipei people. I don’t know you but thanks for sharing that.
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Can you please start a new thread with this?
That’s true and apparent and understandable so no
worries. Men are commonly hostile to other men in this situation.
The Taiwanese lesbian girlfriends are even more hostile. Obviously worried that some foreigner man will steal away their girlfriend.
You’re welcome.
I’m no human behavior expert so I’ll just attempt to explain that concept (reading the air) here. This is my theory so I might well be wrong-take this with a grain of salt. As you may or may not know, Taiwan was a Japanese colony in the early 20th century. The fifty years of colonization have made a huge impact on the way Taiwanese people think and act, to the extent that some visitors start describing us as “Japanese people who speak Chinese”.
Now, Japanese folks are typically very reserved and polite, at least on the outside. They are careful as to not “inconvenience” anyone or show what they truly feel about certain people/issues. While obviously Taiwan didn’t 100% inherit the politeness, the same rule of thumb of minding your own business applies.
For some reason this interpersonal distance is more evident in Taipei than the rest of the country: Taipei dwellers are often criticized for being cold and snobby “Tian Long Ren”. IDK. Maybe the city turns us into assholes, or we just don’t have extra guavas to give to neighbors.
As for lesbians. Oh man. I could go on forever. (Disclaimer- I’m just describing some of the most common stereotypes. Every case is different.)
The typical Taiwanese lesbian couple consists of one “T” (butch) and one “P” (femme). The aforementioned male aggression towards foreigners also applies to the butch lesbian scenario: many dudes who have difficulty getting girlfriends are bitter AF and do not appreciate seeing white dudes or T girls (who are hotter than they are, lmao) scoring dates. Sometimes butches return the hostility they experience. Also, in many cases the P is actually bisexual/straight with occasional exceptions/really really closeted. Many a time they leave their T to be with some random guy and from what I know it’s really traumatic-akin to betraying the lesbian identity- for butches. Hence the protectiveness.
I personally think it’s the traditional “male”/female gender split in these relationships that make life outside of it so hard to navigate. Due to the LGBT community being “underground” for so long, many Taiwanese lesbians are still very old-school. People have limited access to limited information, so they cling to existing gender roles or behaviors (chest-binding, dressing in masculine clothing, wearing a single earring on the left ear…) for a sense of security and, to an extent, gaydar visibility. Butches have this pressure (from other butches/their GFs/sometimes even friends and family if they are out) to act male all of the time, and displaying protectiveness over a girl is traditionally a guy thing. In some rare cases, the “butch” might actually be a heterosexual, transgender man. He just doesn’t know it yet.
People are opening up to new possibilities. We know it’s ok to be whatever you are. To like who you like and be comfortable in your own skin. I have friends who are in PP or TT relationships, friends who are bi, pan, or ace (I’m asexual), and friends who look butch but have a boyfriend. It’s all good.
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I notice that everything people complain about here is standard practice in Boston. I lived longer in Boston than I would have liked, so what I notice is when people aren’t acting like Massholes.
When I was a kid I was skinny. I noticed that big, beefy guys got all the respect. So I bulked up. I generally don’t go shoving people out of the way, but I’m secure in the knowledge that shoving me isn’t an option for anyone.
Only a wimp says “I’m walking here!” A real man simply demonstrates the fact that he is indeed walking there, so deal with it.
Most places in urban Taiwan are built too narrow. Whose fault is that? Not mine.
Growing up in the States, the indicator was an earring in the right ear.
Lesbians wear it on the left while gay dudes=the right