Taiwan, a violent place?

Careful or I’m going to make translating the shehui xinwen a daily habit. (It’s already a weekly one.)

appledaily.com.tw/appledaily … 4%E5%B1%8D

A Mr. Tseng in Hsinchu sold some property and came into 8 million TWD, at which point his friend Mr. Cheng asked to borrow 1 million so that he could loan it out to other people at high interest rates (a respectable practice of course).

Tseng, naturally, refused, which caused Cheng and his buddy Mr. Yang to equally naturally hold Tseng hostage and cut his leg with a knife as a threat. But I guess they forgot that cutting people hurts. When Tseng complained about the pain, they gave him a hearty dose of heroine to help him through it. It was so effective at stopping the pain that it killed him.

So Cheng and Yang loaded the corpse of Tseng onto a scooter and went looking around for a place to hide the body. It was discovered. They confessed and turned in two accomplices, but were honestly and legitimately surprised to learn that he had died. (Were they not paying attention? What? Drug-addled hooligans!) “How could he have died from that cut,” asked Cheng, who apparently had somehow forgotten that he had injected his childhood buddy with a lethal amount of heroine.

The amount of child neglection here is horrible. It’s a cultural thing. Someone tells me that it’s not bad, it’s that I don’t understand the culture, but f*ck it.

A friend of mine went to live in Spain when he was 6 or 7 years old, and he grew up there. I was discussing with him once that my in-laws were astonished to see me lying in the floor to play with my daughter when she was months old (my father in-law was this close to call the hospital because he thought I had a seizure and I had fallen to the floor). My friend (born to taiwanese parents, as I said) told me that all the relationship with his father was when he came home from school with his grades and have to show them to him.

I think that’s neglecting your kids. I think that’s not being a good parent, but not being a parent at all.

Then there is old people who realize they missed all of their kids’ infancies and try to compensate by being overprotective when their kids have their own families, wanting them to go together everywhere, do everything together, etc. That’s f*cked up.

It’s like the ones who prefer to give the kids a tablet or phone so they play angry birds or candy crush to keep them quiet, instead of teaching them how to draw, solve puzzles, and make all kinds of DIY stuff they can play with afterwards. Nothing is more satisfying than playing with a toy you’ve made yourself, to your liking. But no, many parents in Taiwan don’t believe in that, and the ones they do, they’re bringing their kids to classes because they don’t know how to make sh*t. It’s OK to enroll them in classes, but they should tag along and do things together. Infancy is where you create bonds with your kids. If you don’t, it’ll be even worse when they are in their teens, and when they are adults, they will feel like you’re bothering them. If that happens, you missed your chance of being a parent.

To be fair I had more chances recently to interact with young fathers and hear their ideas of parenting, and I was surprised as many had quite modern views and were very active in looking after the kids. There were still a few who have put their kids in another city though and only see them at weekends, that’s always going to be weird to me. There are even mothers that do that too, and sometimes they live in the same city!

Anyway…there is God damn awful story I read in the press today about two brothers 20 odd years old, who decided to commit suicide when their A-ma died recently. They had formed a very strong bond with her. Their father had died 21 years ago and their mother had abandoned them when she remarried, so they were raised by A-ma and A-gong. This abandoning an old family to raise a new family is a peculiar characteristic of local culture.

They hung themselves from Lugu bridge, one succeeded in killing himself but the other brother’s rope snapped and he plunged 10 metres to the riverbed below, his body turning into a mush of broken bones but he survived for now.

They obviously never got over their abandonment at a very young age.
appledaily.com.tw/appledaily/art … 1%E6%AD%BB

there’s all sorts of parents in countries around the world with different parenting styles , good and bad. like here in the u.s., i feel like a lot of parents neglect their kids. either cuz they are too busy with work or just dont care that much. the rich parents send their kids away to boarding school in another state or in europe. i believe that is also parental neglect albeit a more elitist and fancier way of doing it. also many parents spoil their kids a lot and give them too much freedom and leeway. i see kids so utterly rude and disrespectful to parents/grandparents/teachers/authority, even the police. people treat elderly people in the u.s. pretty atrociously and crimes against the elderly is not uncommon. i guess the opposite extreme of that is the asian/confucius way which is utmost obedience to your parents/elders where you dont even have a right to express your own thoughts and opinions or ask questions. somewhere in the middle ground of both extremes is probably the right balance.

but whatever culture or country you live in, i think there’s universal agreement that raising kids is very hard. and expensive!!! i’m often glad i dont have kids. i mean the stress alone from raising kids would get me in addition to regular every day stress from work and life. i would definitely age 10 years older instead of looking 10 years younger. :smiley:

[quote=“Leftywang81”]
But stereotypes are inevitable and believe it or not, the locals do not appreciate it when ABCs or foreigners come in and assume they can just talk to their girlfriends just because “they can”.[/quote]

It’s indeed sad when a woman needs her partner permission to talk to someone or when a man is so insecure that the mere sight of another man (who might not know the girl is there with someone) talking to his partner enrages him. I have long since given up the pick up game due to being in a happy relationship, but I would always assume it is ok to start a conversation with people in a bar. That’s the definition of a respectable place. If you need to consider the possibility of someone punching you in the face for talking to the wrong person, you might want to change where you hang out.

There is a difference in culture regarding kids here.

One is that young adults are under tremendous pressure for their parents to have children, to “continue the family name” i.e. provide a pension plan for their grandparents. The parents probably just give in and there must be a significant number who don’t really want the children they produce.

Also with both parents working, many kids must feel neglected. The entire cram school system is basically a baby-sitting system, build so parents don’t feel guilty about leaving their kids home alone or with grandma. There are some children at my school who get dropped off very early and picked up at closing time, which is sad as they often show the most disruptive attention seeking behavior in class.

I agree on what you say about the cram school system, but working long hours is not an excuse to neglect your children. Both my parents worked when I was a kid, and kept working long hours when my brother was born. We had a babysitter, but she went back to his home at 8:00, and sometimes my parents weren’t home by then, so I took care of my baby brother then (I’m 7 1/2 years older than him). I learned to cook when I was 9 years old because sometimes my brother was hungry before my parents were able to get back home, so I asked my grandma to teach me some simple dishes, and she did. I knew my parents cared deeply about us, and I never felt neglected because I knew they did their part.

Even when sometimes my father didn’t get home until 10:00 PM (mon-sat), he always took the time to sit on the sofa, put me on his knees, and read or tell me a bedtime story. On sundays (his only free day), he always took me and my brother to go browse second-hand books, and we always got back home with a book under our arms. He would read us those books later, or when we were older, we would discuss those books after reading them. Before going to work on saturdays, he would always ask us to help him do the house shopping for the week since we were really young, and we helped him buy things at the market, bakery and supermarket. That was his way of teaching us to do our part, as he did his.

My mother also worked long hours, but she always had the time to look for small DIY projects we could do at home, and encourage us to do them, helping us if we got stuck. If we spent time doing that, she could clean our home, cook, and do other house chores. We never got bored, and we never felt neglected.

In truth, all that baby-caring I did with my brother has been very useful when my daughter was born. And I can’t wait until she’s old enough to begin making our DIY projects as well. She’ll love that.

I agree on what you say about the cram school system, but working long hours is not an excuse to neglect your children. Both my parents worked when I was a kid, and kept working long hours when my brother was born. We had a babysitter, but she went back to his home at 8:00, and sometimes my parents weren’t home by then, so I took care of my baby brother then (I’m 7 1/2 years older than him). I learned to cook when I was 9 years old because sometimes my brother was hungry before my parents were able to get back home, so I asked my grandma to teach me some simple dishes, and she did. I knew my parents cared deeply about us, and I never felt neglected because I knew they did their part.

Even when sometimes my father didn’t get home until 10:00 PM (mon-sat), he always took the time to sit on the sofa, put me on his knees, and read or tell me a bedtime story. On sundays (his only free day), he always took me and my brother to go browse second-hand books, and we always got back home with a book under our arms. He would read us those books later, or when we were older, we would discuss those books after reading them. Before going to work on saturdays, he would always ask us to help him do the house shopping for the week since we were really young, and we helped him buy things at the market, bakery and supermarket. That was his way of teaching us to do our part, as he did his.

My mother also worked long hours, but she always had the time to look for small DIY projects we could do at home, and encourage us to do them, helping us if we got stuck. If we spent time doing that, she could clean our home, cook, and do other house chores. We never got bored, and we never felt neglected.

In truth, all that baby-caring I did with my brother has been very useful when my daughter was born. And I can’t wait until she’s old enough to begin making our DIY projects as well. She’ll love that.[/quote]

man, what a sweet story. thank you for sharing. reminds me of my own childhood with my parents both working long hours in the restaurants we owned at different times. i was the youngest and it was lonely as both my older brother and sister helped out at the restaurant. the unstable family structure and upbringing has negatively affected our lives til this day.

I agree on what you say about the cram school system, but working long hours is not an excuse to neglect your children. Both my parents worked when I was a kid, and kept working long hours when my brother was born. We had a babysitter, but she went back to his home at 8:00, and sometimes my parents weren’t home by then, so I took care of my baby brother then (I’m 7 1/2 years older than him). I learned to cook when I was 9 years old because sometimes my brother was hungry before my parents were able to get back home, so I asked my grandma to teach me some simple dishes, and she did. I knew my parents cared deeply about us, and I never felt neglected because I knew they did their part.

Even when sometimes my father didn’t get home until 10:00 PM (mon-sat), he always took the time to sit on the sofa, put me on his knees, and read or tell me a bedtime story. On sundays (his only free day), he always took me and my brother to go browse second-hand books, and we always got back home with a book under our arms. He would read us those books later, or when we were older, we would discuss those books after reading them. Before going to work on saturdays, he would always ask us to help him do the house shopping for the week since we were really young, and we helped him buy things at the market, bakery and supermarket. That was his way of teaching us to do our part, as he did his.

My mother also worked long hours, but she always had the time to look for small DIY projects we could do at home, and encourage us to do them, helping us if we got stuck. If we spent time doing that, she could clean our home, cook, and do other house chores. We never got bored, and we never felt neglected.

In truth, all that baby-caring I did with my brother has been very useful when my daughter was born. And I can’t wait until she’s old enough to begin making our DIY projects as well. She’ll love that.[/quote]

man, what a sweet story. thank you for sharing. reminds me of my own childhood with my parents both working long hours in the restaurants we owned at different times. I was the youngest and it was lonely as both my older brother and sister helped out at the restaurant. the unstable family structure and upbringing has negatively affected our lives til this day.[/quote]

Well, my parents had to struggle a lot to take care of us, but they always find the time to remind us they cared about us, and that the most important thing was to keep the family together no matter what. They got married very young (My father was 22, my mother 21), and they had me two years later, in 76. When I was a year and a half, my grandfather died at 53, leaving a lot of projects unfinished (he had been grooming my mother and two of my uncles to take over his factories, but when he died, one of his partners took all the money and left). My grandma was left with 4 daughters and 5 sons at home (my mother was already married by then) and had to improvise a lot to provide for my uncles and aunts. But she fought hard and managed to do it.

My mother took on my grandmother’s determination, and up to this day, she never failed to help us however she could. My father has also been there, in his own way. If my mother provided the push to keep things running, my father was the stability. Almost limitless patience, and taught us about respect. His parents (my grandparents) were hard-working people, not having been able to study due to humble origins and the spanish civil war, but they always provided for my father and helped us too.

No way we would ever feel neglected. Sure, we didn’t have famous brand clothing or expensive toys, but we made our own toys, we had many books to read at home (plus the regular visits to the library), and we always had our grandmas to stuff us with great homemade food. They NEVER gave us money for free, we had to do extra chores to earn it, so we learned how to value the things we had.

I remember one year things were so bad, my father asked me if I could give up one of my stuffed animals as a christmas gift for my little brother. Of course, I accepted it without complaining about it. They were always straightforward, and trusted us to do the right thing, and so did we try to.

I wouldn’t change a single thing from those years, at least, not from what my parents did (there are a couple of personal mistakes I wouldn’t mind to change, but that’s my fault, not theirs).

[quote=“Belgian Pie”]he couldn’t leave his cab unattended in the middle of the road, so he gave up chasing me.
[/quote]

I wouldn’t rely on this. Seen a taxi unattended in the middle of the road the other day. The engine was running too.
So, Taiwan does not feel violent or unsafe after 9 months odd. Not one bit. Feels a lot quieter here than Beijing, Paris and other places I’ve been.

A driver here could leave their car unattended for a bit and not have it stolen.
So they would chase you with a wrench.

As to crossing the road, I think it’s a relief after Beijing. Why even bother strolling the sidewalk in Beijing is the question.

taiwan barely even has pavements to stroll on.

i think the traffic in china and taiwan is both as dangerous as each other. seen accidents in both but only came close to being run over myself in taiwan…in a tiny alleyway that had no traffic. just one prick driver.

[quote=“eelstork”][quote=“Belgian Pie”]he couldn’t leave his cab unattended in the middle of the road, so he gave up chasing me.
[/quote]

I wouldn’t rely on this. Seen a taxi unattended in the middle of the road the other day. The engine was running too.
So, Taiwan does not feel violent or unsafe after 9 months odd. Not one bit. Feels a lot quieter here than Beijing, Paris and other places I’ve been.

A driver here could leave their car unattended for a bit and not have it stolen.
So they would chase you with a wrench.

As to crossing the road, I think it’s a relief after Beijing. Why even bother strolling the sidewalk in Beijing is the question.[/quote]

But leave your car outside unattended and locked for several weeks in the same spot and it probably will get stolen. Happened to a colleague.

[quote=“nonredneck”][quote=“eelstork”][quote=“Belgian Pie”]he couldn’t leave his cab unattended in the middle of the road, so he gave up chasing me.
[/quote]

I wouldn’t rely on this. Seen a taxi unattended in the middle of the road the other day. The engine was running too.
So, Taiwan does not feel violent or unsafe after 9 months odd. Not one bit. Feels a lot quieter here than Beijing, Paris and other places I’ve been.

A driver here could leave their car unattended for a bit and not have it stolen.
So they would chase you with a wrench.

As to crossing the road, I think it’s a relief after Beijing. Why even bother strolling the sidewalk in Beijing is the question.[/quote]

But leave your car outside unattended and locked for several weeks in the same spot and it probably will get stolen. Happened to a colleague.[/quote]

CARS GET STOLEN EVERYWHERE IN CITIES IN EVERY COUNTRY AROUND THE WORLD!!! MY CAR GOT STOLEN IN A QUIET RESIDENTIAL NEIGHBORHOOD IN SAN FRANCISCO AND MY FRIEND WHO’S VISITING THIS WEEK GOT HIS CAR BROKEN INTO AND BAG STOLEN THE FIRST NIGHT IN SF!!! GEEZ, PEOPLE!!! :unamused: CONCLUSION: TAIWAN IS GENERALLY SAFER THAN MANY COUNTRIES AROUND THE WORLD BUT YES CRIMES STILL OCCUR THERE. CASE CLOSED. :bow:

Drive by shooting at a weekend in Changhua. As per my coworkers, mafia dealings.

It was a set-up, according to FTV. They asked a gang leader to come for a “peace dinner” and shot him up.

If you’re not a gang leader leader, nothing to worry about.

He must have been a bloody stupid gang leader. Haven’t thugs been using that trick since the stone age?

You would think this sort of accelerated natural selection would produce criminals of superhuman intelligence.

Maybe it does, and they’re just biding their time.

Khaaaaaaaannnn!

He must have been a bloody stupid gang leader. Haven’t thugs been using that trick since the stone age?

You would think this sort of accelerated natural selection would produce criminals of superhuman intelligence.

Maybe it does, and they’re just biding their time.

Khaaaaaaaannnn![/quote]

Well it’s possible he bred before being shot, so if stupidity is genetic then it would already be passed down and not eliminated from the gene pool.

http://www.hngn.com/articles/37917/20140804/samsung-smartphone-stops-bullet-saves-man-s-life-taiwan.htm

This is why I buy Samsung and not HTC. :wink:

Here we go - the ‘Taiwan isn’t violent’ myth. Domestic violence is epidemic in this country. Families covering up violence against women and children. I have heard a woman getting beaten and pleading for her life. The police are called, do nothing and he carries on beating her. I have my students tel me that daddy hits mommy.
Do not tell me that ‘Taiwan is so safe and so non-violent’ - just because other countries have the courage to confront violence in the home and denounce it - doesn’t mean Taiwan is better.
Continuing to promote the myth that Taiwan is ‘non-violent’ is unhelpful and untrue.

I think there is a fair but of awareness that domestic violence is wrong these days, but there is little outside intervention or help available I would say.

There’s a massive amount of passive aggressive violence against objects here, so cars dinged and scratched, scooters tires slashed, these kinda of actions. Just in the last year I’ve collected one large scratch after complaining about a car parking on the pavement, one patch of oil on my windscreen having moved a bike to get kids out of my car, and numerous dings from doors hitting my car in parking lots (accidentally or perhaps not).