What is a ninja’s favorite section of the bookstore? Stealth help
Why can’t you trust atoms? Because they make up everything
What is the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is very heavy and the other is a little lighter.
What’s the opposite of irony?
How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face
How many ninjas does it take to change a lightbulb?
Whoa, it’s already been changed!
What’s the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chick pea?
President Trump never had a garbanzo bean on him.
What do you call a rabbit with a bent dick?
According to a new survey, 40 percent of adults in Mexico say they would move to the United States if they got a chance. The number would have been higher, but the other 60 percent already live here.
What did the Italian coffee say to the clotted cream?
“It’s hard for me to espresso myself, but I love you a latte”
Who was the spiciest knight at the Round Table?
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity, it’s impossible to put down
I know it’s late notice, but a friend of mine has two tickets for the Super Bowl in Minneapolis in just a few hours.
They are box seats, he paid $3,500 per ticket, which includes the ride to and from the airport, lunch, dinner, a $400.00 bar tab and a pass to the winners locker room after the game.
What he didn’t realize when he bought them last year was that it’s on the same day as his wedding.
If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.
St. Paul’s Church in Minneapolis at 3 pm. Five feet four inches, 115 lbs. Her name is Ashley, and she’ll be the one in the white dress.