It was revealed today that 10% of all children in Australia are not actually the biological children of fathers who believe them to be their children.
Is this the sort of information you really want to know?
It was revealed today that 10% of all children in Australia are not actually the biological children of fathers who believe them to be their children.
Is this the sort of information you really want to know?
i cant think of a more horrible feeling than finding out âyourâ child isnt really yours. what a betrayal. to go through all the emotions of having a child, seeing it when its born etc then to find out the cheating bitch screwed you over and didnt have the decency to tell you since she is probably using you anyways. it hasnt happend to me, in case people figure iam jaded. i just think its a horrible thing to do to someone. shows no sense of honor and decency.
That may or may not be true. She may prefer you as a âgood fatherâ, and go for the genes of some stud. Sheâs just doing what is best for the kids.
Well, any woman would be a single mother in an instant, if she pulled that one on me.
Honestly, thatâs one thing a man can never be sure of - is he the father of the children, he loves and supports. But it would be a horrible blow to anyone.
A horrible but common situation. Aboriginee societies quite frequently reckon lineage matralinealy because it is always possible to say who someoneâs mother is, but fathers
Show some respectâŚ
Iâd be your daddy,
but the line was too long.
Mommaâs babyâŚ
Poppaâs? maybeâŚ
To what extent is this issue changing with advances in DNA technology and more extensive pre-natal testing? In other words, with all of the tests they do these days, both during pregnancy and immediately after childbirth, does it not become clear fairly quickly whether a child belongs to the father? Perhaps the existing tests simply choose not to measure this?
One look at my sonâs ears was enough for me to know he was mine. And now, he scowls the same way I do, same fold in the forehead skin. Yup. 100% sure. Tell, you the truth, I knew he was mine before he was born. If you still worry about this, maybe you shouldnât have kids.
But that reminds me of a joke I heard on Benny Hill:
A man and a woman were walking their baby through the park. An old lady stops and says, âWhat a beautiful baby. Heâs got his fatherâs eyes.â
And the woman replies, âYes, but he has my husbandâs nose.â
For the most part, IMO, parenting begins when the child is born.
Just about anyone can sire or give birth to a child. But, it takes a mother and a father to raise the child.
[quote=âTigermanâ]For the most part, IMO, parenting begins when the child is born.
Just about anyone can sire or give birth to a child. But, it takes a mother and a father to raise the child.[/quote]Thatâs touching, mate. Good job.
Cool, I had been thinking of starting a thread like this after reading a couple of articles about the situation in Germany where the numbers seem to be similar as in Australia.
There is a big discussion about the introduction of a law in Germany that would rule out secret DNA testing by suspicious dads without knowledge of the mother, and the SPIEGEL had a couple of articles about that.
What sort of dumb-founded me reading those articles was that fathers after realizing that they were not the biological fathers of children they had raised and loved for years would all of a sudden completely reject those children. Thatâs something I can not understand. How can a father from one day to another reject a child that he claims to have loved all this time because it turns out not to carry his genes? Iâm sort of with Tigerman here, itâs easy to sire a child. But to raise a child, teach it and care about it, is the real achievement. Why would anyone invalidate this achievement by rejecting the same child? Not even considering that the child is definitely the last one to blame?
Can anybody explain that, please?
Thanks
Iris
I think only CVS or amnio, which are the most invasive tests, could potentially do it, but the testing is only done on specific chromosomal sites. Iâd think youâd have to run a full DNA scan and compare it to the fatherâs to assure paternity, which would obviously not be done unless requested. A ânormalâ pregnancy involves no invasive testing outside of a mid-term blood test - and thatâs the motherâs blood. After birth, they do take blood from the baby, and again, if you wanted to run it through for DNA you could do
[quote=âirisâ]
What sort of dumb-founded me reading those articles was that fathers after realizing that they were not the biological fathers of children they had raised and loved for years would all of a sudden completely reject those children. Thatâs something I can not understand. How can a father from one day to another reject a child that he claims to have loved all this time because it turns out not to carry his genes? [/quote]
First of all, I would file for divorce immediately, as this is the most dirty and trustbreaking one a wife can pull on her husband.
Secondly, a rather large part of fatherhood is bringing the genes on another generation, and I can see little point of spending a large part of my time and income on another guyâs child. He made (with my wife/partner), and he has to care for it.
However, I would not reject the child as such, but things like surname, heritage and so on would have to be sorted out. After all, a child is only mine, if I sire it, right?
Very little I think. Even if they could, it is too many legal issues to reveal it or even do it without the mother concenting. Wouldnât surprise me if they(the hospital) are not even allowed to ask, since declining a test too would pretty much settle it. Also you need to match it with the fatherâs DNA; and they never take any blood test on the father unless there is some history of fetal rejection.
On the other hand here in TW it might be different since a humanoid exiting a spaceship would attract less stares than someone not knowing his blood type.
Must be a lot of milkmen in Australia who prey on âdirty Sheilasâ
Itâs interesting you mention that Iris, because in Australia the opposite is true. In that it is women who tend to have these things checked out to make sure they are clear about parternity.
The reason I heard about this has to do with a case I have been following in Australia about one of our politicans who in a debate on abortion said that he had given his own son up for adoption rather than follow the abortion path. Then as fate would have it that son now 27 was working in parliment as a sound engineer and was already acquainted with this politican. After all this was revealed the final twist in the story came about when someother guy whoâd had an affair with this politicanâs lover at about the same time said, âHey! Wait a minute that boy looks like my own kids!â and raised the possibility. He was proven right through DNA testing. What a fiasco!
Interestingly enough the boys real (adoptive) parents who have raised him pretty wouderfully have been sidelined through the whole drama.
I have to disagree with you, Mr. He, on this matter.
If what you say is true, then adoption cannot work.
But, I know that adoption does work.
Thus, what you say cannot be true.
I agree with Tigerman that a father child relationship can definitely be formed with an adopted child or with a child from a womanâs previous relationship, but surely a man has the right to know if he is the biological father of the child that his wife gives birth to. Itâs prepososterous to me that anyone would question that for a second. Hopefully though if a man finds out that he is not the biological father of the children he has been raising he will be big enough to continue showing care for his children and will save his wrath for the person who most probably deserves it. There may be exceptions to this but if a woman coldly plans something like this with the full intention of deceiving a man she is about the lowest scum there is.
Indeed.
[quote=âMr Heâ]First of all, I would file for divorce immediately, as this is the most dirty and trustbreaking one a wife can pull on her husband.
Secondly, a rather large part of fatherhood is bringing the genes on another generation, and I can see little point of spending a large part of my time and income on another guyâs child. He made (with my wife/partner), and he has to care for it.
However, I would not reject the child as such, but things like surname, heritage and so on would have to be sorted out. After all, a child is only mine, if I sire it, right?[/quote]
A) I was talking about the children, not the mothers. Yes, of course, a situation like that would be an immense breach of trust. And you would be right to blame the mother. But the child/children would definitely be the last ones to blame.
B) Sorry, but the gene thing seems a little out-dated to me. If you want to reduce humans and their behaviour to genes and sciences, I guess the scientist who published in last weekâs SPIEGEL that humans scientifically are supposed to look for a new partner every 3-4 years and every other âscientistâ explaining while long-term relationships just arenât supposed to work for humans are right, too?
C) Slightly different situation but since I was 4, I was raised by my step-father who proudly claims to be my father and who was the one taking care of me, studying with me for exams and making sure I had everything I needed while my biological father refuses to acknowledge my existence and hasnât spoken a word with me in 6 years. As much as I carry my biological fatherâs genes, my step-father has shaped me, my identity and what I think and do much more than my biological father ever could. And he seems to be prouder of me than my biological dad will ever be.
D) What I truly do not understand about the situation I had mentioned (and they had cited several cases where exactly that had happened) is how somebody can spend a lot of time with a child, take care of a child, love a child, in some cases fight for visitation rights after breaking up with the mother of a child and then after hearing that the child didnât happen to carry his genes, from one day to another STOP loving a child.
I just donât get it.
Iris