7-11 "Taquitos"!?!...that's a language crime

Yes, I’m very aware that my tastebuds deserve the imminent displeasure they experienced since it’s pretty much a given that 7-11 food (especially in Taiwan) is a bad thing. And I should have walked away from the little hot-dog roller when I realized they called the taquitos “Italian”…but it was surely and honest mistake since:
a) there was a picture of a Sombrero next to the words “Yi Da Li”,
b) the Taquito definitely looked like a fairly authentic mexican Taquito,
c) the 7-11 tequitos in America are pretty damn good
and d) we’re dealing with people who think any westerner is American (so mistaking Mexican for italian is only a minor offense).

But, alas, they were right-on in calling them Italian. They are essentially rolled tortillias with a marinara paste inside…with a god-aweful taste. My proposal…this should be considered a crime against the english speaking world, second only to the title of the movie “The Never-ending Story” (thank you Lionel Hutts), and they should be renamed to a more appropriate “Italian shit tubes”.

When I first saw them, I busted out laughing right then and there. Then I thought to myself, “mmm, Taquitos!!!”. They are one of the most foul things you could ever stick in your mouth from a 7-11. Foul!

Actually I quite liked the first ones, that were nominally Mexican, before they introduced the “Italian” ones.

7-11 “taquitos”: an insult to me on a very personal level. And that’s all I’m going to say. :fume:

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

Havent’ tried them but I’m sure they suck. I was once addicted to crispy little tacquitos smothered in guac that we bought at a place affectionately referred to as the Beaner Barrel, a tiny walk-up restaurant in San Diego in the shape of a barrel that was run by mexicans. Mmmm.

Those vile dildo-like objects are indeed nastiness. The only other reference to Mexico is that terrible commercial about some kind of spicy nuts or snack. A man in some mismatched regional garb (and sporting a curly mustache) prances around with his female counterpart to some kind of ‘Hoedown on Acid’ music, at the end shouting ‘Oh yeah!’ to add some more spice. This is unsurprising given that many Taiwanese people express surprise that Spanish is spoken in South and Central America (did they think they were Injuns?).

South America is in America, so obviously they speak English. Duh. All Americans speak English.

And New Mexico is in Mexico, (it’s a nicer place than Old Mexico), so everyone obviously speaks Spanish (or Mexican, depending on who you ask) :smiley:

Been there done that…Yumm! :slight_smile:

But, the best taquitos I ever had were served up in the parking lot of the imfamous k55 break, about 40 minutes south of the border close to Rosarita beach… :thumbsup:

A quote from a local student: My teacher is from Brazil, in America, so she speaks really good English.
Sadly, my boss, a Taiwanese woman who majored in English at Taida, has a Master’s degree, and works as a translator, didn’t know why the foreigners thought this was funny. What, you mean they don’t speak English in Brazil?

[quote=“Mother Theresa”]. . . crispy little tacquitos smothered in guac [/quote] and my heart leaped, and [quote=“Mother Theresa”] that we bought at a place affectionately referred to as the Beaner Barrel, a tiny walk-up restaurant [/quote] and I thought, “Where is this place? Where?” and [quote=“Mother Theresa”]in San Diego . . . [/quote] and my heart fell. :frowning:

[quote=“sbmoor262004”]Those vile . . . are indeed nastiness. . . . ‘Hoedown on Acid’. . . shouting ‘Oh yeah!’ . . . [/quote] :laughing: Hilarious!

Maybe I’m crazy (or psycho), but I think the ones that are red inside are delicious. I’ve tried the other flavor, looks greenish inside, it’s disgusting.

You can tell which is which by the outside. The ones with red sauce have some black herbs / dots on the outside. The green crap filled ones don’t have any specks.

The thing is, at 3 in the morning when you’ve got the munchies, they taste damn good.

I don’t think I’d ever try one sober, though.

I’ve had the red ones, and I figure they wouldn’t have been too bad if I’d bought them before they dried out in the frank-heater-jobby. They do taste Italian, like they’ve got oregano or something in them. To me, the key identifier of Mexican food is comino or cumin, whichever you call it, and as far as I can tell, these 7-11 units don’t contain any comino.

What’s in the green ones?

I threw mine away in the bin outside the 711 as soon as I took my first bite.

I called the police. When they arrived they seized the hotdog machine, took prints off the magazine stand and arrested the assistant.

A real taquito isn’t crunchy, though. That’s a ‘flauta’ (flute). In Oaxaco, Mexico, you can get them with roasted grasshoppers. The Native Americans in Mexico in the South use a lot of insects in their diet. But I have yet to find a good guacamole served in any restaurant; they never add the cilantro, and guac without cilantro is just damned mashed avocados.
As for the Brazilians speaking English, I’m sad to confess that most Americans (in the U.S. sense) don’t know that they speak Portuguese. And, yes, Brazil is the best country I have ever been to in so many ways.

I actually don’t think that those 7-11 Mexican/Italian things are that bad. Really, I’ve literally paid for and eaten one of those things and it was of my own voilition. I’m not shitting you. But NT for NT, the best deal at 7-11 are those 15NT sandwiches.

On the other hand, what really is indeed inhumanly vile and disgusting are those “Mexico burritos” at Familymart. They consist of one not bad tortilla; some fetid, brown pieces of lettuce; half a slimy hot dog; and some seriously rancid mayo. Of course, even after soberly observing its utter vileness, I still ate it.

[quote=“alidarbac”]I actually don’t think that those 7-11 Mexican/Italian things are that bad. Really, I’ve literally paid for and eaten one of those things and it was of my own voilition. I’m not shitting you. But NT for NT, the best deal at 7-11 are those 15NT sandwiches.

On the other hand, what really is indeed inhumanly vile and disgusting are those “Mexico burritos” at Familymart. They consist of one not bad tortilla; some fetid, brown pieces of lettuce; half a slimy hot dog; and some seriously rancid mayo. Of course, even after soberly observing its utter vileness, I still ate it.[/quote]
I took the liberty of posting the link to the photo you put up on your website. The only redeeming feature of tyhat post is the sensational picture of Gong Li beneath. I’m surprised the wiener can stay limp!: http://www.bokane.org/abtom/archives/2004/05/mexico_burrito.html
:nsfw: (The burrito that is, the Gong Li image is alright…)

Who cares that they don’t taste like they do back home. A hot dog isn’t the same here and requires all the sauces to become edible. Good thing I like the sauces.

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

Oh man, that is so funny. I wonder if that’s where my wife got her idea. She recently brought home a pack of tortillas from Costco and first thing she did with them was put a hot dog inside with some relish and mustard. It’s actually not that bad, but I keep wondering where the hell she got that idea. She’s even had real burritos on multiple occasions.