A loan to my ex-girlfriend -- I want my money back!

I loaned $200,000 NT to my ex-girlfriend back in 1997. She promised to pay me back in one year. We do not have anything in writing but only a verbal agreement (trusting and stupid me). We broke up in 1998.

One year later 1998, I asked her for the money back but she said she didn’t have any and said she’d pay back one more year later. When the time came, the same excuses came up and then she said she’ll pay one more year later. Three years has gone by and I had a friend call for me to ask for this money. She then told my friend I “gave” her this money and said it was a joke that I waited three years to call for this money.

Afterward, I started tape recording her phone calls and got her to admit everything about borrowing the money on tape. But at this point, I’m not sure what else I can do. I tried to go to a lawyer and this lawyer said I’ll end up spending about $10,000 NT to write a letter to her, $60,000 to go to court, and $30,000 - 50,000 to collect if she doesn’t pay, which is most likely to happen. That’s more than half of what I loaned.

I have to say that 99% of my friends or friend’s family in Taiwan have had their money cheated in some way or another. What kind of society is this anyway?!! Is there justice? I’m not going to settle for the typical “suan le” or “forget it, it was a lesson anyway”.

Nice guys shouldn’t finish last!

If I were you, I’d threaten to post her picture up here unless she pays you back.

Otherwise, you may just have to rack it up to hard-knocks. Or you could say that the loss of this money “is the screwing you get for the screwing you got.”

…hmmm…what would a Taiwanese guy do in a situation like this…<When in Rome, do as the Romans - do you know any clever Romans?>

its not what he would do…its what he would give her…two black eyes and a holiday in the ER in Taipei Hospital

My preliminary suggestion would be to have her write you out a post-dated check for the money. For example, the post-dated check could be dated three months or six months from now. That would give her more time to come up with the funds.

If she does not have a checking account, she could “borrow” a check from a friend. If that is not feasible, she could buy a “ben3 piao4” from a stationery store, and write it out to you. If she does not pay at the time that is due, it is a simple procedure to file in court and get a judgement against that, which has a validity of five years or more.

It is important to get something in writing. If you act like you are sympathetic to her situation, she is more likely to give you something written, especially if you stress that your mother is in the hospital and you need the money fairly quickly.

With something in writing, you could also approach her boss, and ask that he automatically deduct a certain amount of money from her monthly salary (as a type of installment payment), to be remitted directly to you.

It is also true that most young Taiwanese people have several credit cards. By getting cash advances on several of the cards, it should not be too difficult for her to raise NT$ 200,000.

Thanks so much for all your replies to this. I tried to get something in writing but she plainly said “NO”. Also she threatened me that if I ask again, she won’t pay me one single NT. She said I’ll just waste my money in court (which is true). All I have is several phone recordings of her admitting she owes me this money. Also admitting the amount. I feel there’s not much I can do. I did ask her to fill out a “ben piao” and she just said “no”. Furthermore, she said “then just sue me. I don’t care. You’ll waste money. My uncle is a lawyer”. God doesn’t this girl have any morals?

You know, I’m getting upset on your behalf. Now I insist that you post her picture up for us to see so that we know to stay away from her. And tell her you are going to do this.

I think people on Oriented Legal forum are Nice People. I’m going to call this girl very soon and try to resolve this issue (hopefully she didn’t run away or move). About posting pictures, I think if I can’t resolve anything with my next call, I will do this! But do you think there is anything immoral or illegal by doing so?
Nice Guy

Do it… Chinese justice and society with regard to crime is based on shame…
look at the 6.00 news here… if a person is a suspect they are paraded in front of all the TV cameras so mama and Baba and the entire family can see it… thus shaming him and his family…I guess so their neighbors can come over and say to them… I knew your son would become nothing but a criminal

Chinese justice seems to be guilty on suspicion and guilty until proved innocent
I wonder can the criminal sue the TV networks for filmimg him without his permission.
Is that not a violation of you civil liberties ??

Several local human rights groups in Taiwan have pointed out that the filming of “suspects” and broadcast on TV, before they have been charged with any crime, is a violation of their civil liberties.

As to how and when such a violation might be dealt with, I suppose we will have to wait for the National Human Rights Commission to be established before there will be more serious discussion on this entire issue.

UPDATE: Thanks everyone for your responses and views as this seems to be the most view page on this legal forum site. I came to a current verbal agreement. The borrower’s mom will pay $10,000 per month starting June of this year 2001. I demanded that she pay $1000NT per month before June 2001 to show their will to do so. I hope I can trust them…

I have several friends who are doing “private research” on this type of “private borrowing” among “private individuals” … so we are wondering if there is any update to this situation, or if other persons can provide related commentary … (about private loans and such matters) …


I have two recent experiences with lending money that may be of interest to you. What kind of information do you need?

Remember these words:

Neither a borrower nor a lender be, For loan oft loses both itself and friend, And borrowing dulleth the edge of husbandry.

-Hamlet I, iii

[Edit] P.S. In my experience, threats of visiting/calling the workplace and/or family was the only thing that got results. One was Taiwanese, the other wasn’t, and works for one of the quasi-embassies here.

Never lend more than you can afford not to get back. Works for me.

ouch that’s like a lot…is that what they usually charge? how about per hour? or they take a percentage of your winning? just want to know and get an idea before I sue anyone…

Attorneys are expensive.

We usually charge by the hour. My hourly rate is NT$ 5,500. The highest hourly rate at my firm for our senior partners is NT$ 10,000. Our associates bill at the rate of NT$ 4,000 per hour.

There will also be court costs. At the District Court, you will need to pay 1% of the amount of your claim - for an NT$ 200,000 claim the cost would be NT$ 2,000.

Attorney fees are not recoverable in Taiwan absent an agreement otherwise.

Dude, you gotta get in on some of that “senior partner” action.

Well, that takes time… and anyway… I don’t get to keep what I bill for. :frowning:

I think you will have to write off this loan as a learning experience. I would be surprised if you even get 1/2 of it back. Let us know what happens…and don’t lend any more money to xiaojays you are dating! Even with a written agreement, you don’t have much to stand on.