Appreciation of Physical Attributes

Following up on that previous post, in case you don’t have time to hop over for a look at the other thread, let me elaborate briefly here:

The pair of warnings that decorate my posts are gifts from an Alien force. Apparently, it rankles her sorely to be reminded that most of us foreign men in Taiwan prefer the slender charms of local xiaojies to more ample American endowments. So she has introduced a new rule of posting, that “Thou shalt not express appreciation of Taiwanese women’s physical attributes. Violators of this edict shall be bombarded with insults and blasted with a volley of warnings.”

Under this new rule, one may only write such sentiments as: “I saw a girl on the MRT today who had the most delectably enormous butt that I’ve seen in ages, at least twice the size of any around her, and which set my heart racing at the naughty thought of how good it would look in a skimpy bikini or less” or “I get so depressed at being surrounded by those petite local girls, the sight of whom makes me ache with longing for the more substantial proportions of our women back home.” Unfortunately, I lack the proper mental discipline, and just can’t bring myself to tell fibs like that. Therefore, I thoroughly deserve to be pilloried and sanctioned to the fullest extent of Alien’s Law.

Now that we have all those Segue shop goodies on which to spend our guanxi, I wonder if I might purchase some dressing for my warnings? I would like to have them presented as “Alien warnings” and coloured in a more eye-catching flaming red. How about it Gus? I’d be glad to splash out a hundred or two G$ on that.

Funny, but when I commented on all the lard-arse foreign chicks here I too was encouraged to see the error of my ways - but gently. For the record, ‘wobblebottom’ is a term of endearment.

Could this be the topic you are looking for, oh shameless appreciator of peach-buttocked maidens?

I have a weakness for the volupt form. Scrawny can be cute and saintly, but curves are hot and sinful. Fatwalk not catwalk would be my motto, if I had one. Which, it now appears, I…errr…do…

I see… In the future I will do like you and cast leering looks at the occasional western zeppeliners drifting into my view.

Just wait till Alien reads this … your all going to get warnings. :laughing: I think pear-shaped is the pc description, as it’s a relative term, and not absolute. I mean you don’t have to say “fat ass,” when you could describe it as “generously proportioned.”

I stand firm for three-dimensional women. Let’s face it, of all the dimensions, the third is the most fun.

A few quotes from the rock world to further this thread… and I am a self proclaimed “fat bottomed girl!” so you men who like to leer at skinny ass gals… you just don’t know what you are missin’

Big bottom, big bottom, talk about mud flaps, my girl has got 'em. - Spinal Tap, Big Bottom

Girl with breasts that go va-voom and booties that go pow. - Digital Underground, Gutfest 89

Got to love it, it’s my duty, she gotta big fat funky booty. - Spin Doctors, Big Fat Funky Booty

The bigger the cushion, the better the pushin’. - Frank Zappa, Sex

Tina’s got a big ole butt, Darlene’s got a big ole butt. - EU, Da’ Butt

And finally, from Queen:

Ah you gonna take me home tonight
Ah down beside that red fire light
Ah you gonna let it all hang out
Fat bottomed girls
You make the rocking world go round

Hey I was just a skinny lad
Never knew no good from bad
But I knew life before I left my nursery huh
Let alone with big fat funny
She was such a naughty nanny
Heap big woman you made a bad boy out of me
Hey hey!

Scrawny girls, bags full of bones – they

“Them big-legged women are back in style again
Them big-legged women are back in style again
You ‘aint had no real lovin’ till you bin loved by one of them.”

Taj Mahal

Sharky of the generous girth, I’m sure you are utterly scrumptious and have legions of admirers panting at your heels. There are, of course, many men like Judge Melty who prefer the zaftig to the wispy – my brother, for one, whose half-German wife is at least twice as large as my own 42-kilogram sweetheart. I have no doubt that we’re equally happy with our highly contrasting choices.

Everyone to his own, I say, and let none pass judgment on another’s taste. The same goes for lads and lasses alike – if a woman expresses a preference for tall, broad-shouldered, musclebound hunks, then I, who am none of those, certainly won’t take it as a personal slight.

Hmmm, I wonder about the respective ratios of Segue’s male posters who prefer their women more amply proportioned to those, like me, who prefer them svelte? It seems to scream out for a poll, don’t you think?

Nothing like a series of posts about female anatomy to bring Omni back to prurient life. We know you too well, my friend… :smiley:

I loved Sharky’s post. Was humming Queen’s famous song on the subject of voluptuous women at the very moment I came across it. Classic.

Omni- You got some Guanxi coming your way…:wink:

Poll Poll Poll…

[quote=“Sharky”]Omni- You got some Guanxi coming your way…:wink:

Poll Poll Poll…[/quote]
Thank you, Sharky! You’re most generous. I’m all set for a wonderful spree at the Forumosa shop – no more mere window shopping and envying Sandman’s bright draperies. Gong xi fa cai to you, and may everything be shun xin ru yi for you and yours in the Year of the Goat.

Come on, it’s just fun. And I must admit that I used to like many different kinds of females. Too skinny canbe bad too. Moreover, I usually look at the inner qualities first, as they are more important :wink

The “inner qualities”, Mr. He? We’re not talking Deep Throat here, are we?

I’m sure that, for many or most of us, there’s a gradual change in what we find attractive as we make our way through life. When I was a teen, almost anything female could drive me wild with lust, while the girl of my dreams was the archetypal blue-eyed, blond-haired and busty little English damsel. After passing through many different phases, I’ve become fixed (and fixated) in my passion for elfin Chinese xiaojies. I doubt if that will ever change, even unto my dotage (which is still many decades away, despite unkind suggestions to the contrary from certain quarters).

elfin? what makes qualities make them elfin?

Their diminutive stature, lissom grace and other fairylike qualities endow them with an irresistible elfin charm. Haven’t you noticed?

Well, I love my wife just as she is, a true Tang dynasty beauty…

But if I was FORCED to choose a different shape and style for my dearest, it would have to be thin and “slinky”.

Omni, My tastes have followed an evolutionary path as well. I won’t bore the rest of you with the details.

Hopefully, we can pass this off as sociolically valuable information that offers insight into the unelightened heterosexual male psyche.

Anybody want to add anything to this thread? About women, beasties, beastly women, their male counterparts, posting on Segue, not being able to think of anything to post on Segue, or whatever else tickles your fancy or comes to mind. Come on, it’s the hols and you’ve all got loads of time on your hands, so write absolutely anything you like and let’s get this thread throbbing again. Gong xi, gong xi!