Armed, dangerous, and ignored?

A co-worker of someone I know well recently announced her engagement. Much to her surprise, she then started to receive a series of threatening phone calls and e-mail messages from someone who declared his long-secret “love” for her. The message of these was basically “If you marry that other man, I will get a gun and kill you. And then I will kill myself so we can be together in heaven.” People in the office have learned the identity of the man behind these. He works in the same office.

Admittedly, as an American, my perspective may be more alarmist about such things than is called for in this society. But I can’t help but believe that even here such warning signs shouldn’t be given the mei guanxi treatment, which is of course basically what has happened.

The managers in the office have discouraged the woman from going to the police. Some of her co-workers did. As far as I know, the police merely took a report and have done nothing further.

Is there no police unit that deals with violence against women, or with the mentally ill? Who can be contacted who would give this the attention it quite possibly deserves, and force the office managers to do the same?

The world can be screwed up sometimes and this is just one example. I have received threat calls from a girl about three months ago from a girl who liked me two years ago and I kept telling her we are not compatible. Actually, I thought she was a little crazy and obsessive so that’s why I didn’t like her. After receiving the threat calls from her and her friends claiming they’ll beat me up, etc… I did go to the POLICE and you know what? The police said “mei guanxi”. And literally laughed in my face saying a women can’t harm me. Well, nothing did happened except every time I went home, my home and cellular phone would ring and then hang up (to let me know I was being followed and watched). My advice is to find out who this guy is and make sure. Then find out as much as you can about him including his home address, ID, parents name, family history, and then if you feel there are more threats, go to the police anyways. Then if the police do not do anything and he continues to make threats, then give his number to as many people, including me (I can speak chinese) and we’ll threaten his *** to shut the **** up!
Advice Guy

Your situation is really serious…
You also can apply to non-government organisations to protect your human rights.

The Awakening Foundation deals with all types of issues of concern to women, including harassment. The address and telephone numbers may be found on the Chinese language website at

The English language introduction is at

The wedding has now taken place … without gunfire or other such unpleasantness.
Thanks, everyone, for your advice and information.