I think the issue is that English is simply a joke in Taiwan and whilst foreigners are expected to agonize over the choice of a Chinese name, and accept smilingly criticism that their Chinese name isn’t “Chinese” enough, Taiwanese people expect us to address them as “Hitler” and “Mars” and shite like that.
I think the issue is that English is simply a joke in Taiwan and whilst foreigners are expected to agonize over the choice of a Chinese name, and accept smilingly criticism that their Chinese name isn’t “Chinese” enough, Taiwanese people expect us to address them as “Hitler” and “Mars” and shite like that.[/quote]
I think that’s about right. Any time that I get asked to “help,” I try to do so with sincerity. That said, Genitalia still has me rolling! Really took balls to give that name out and with a straight face! 
OK, entries in the goofball name contest:
- Yaven
- Aico
- Nacl
- Mui Mui
- Bear (girl)
- Kodak
- Mok
- Psyche
- Coca (no cola)
- Moon
- Oreo
- SoSo
I agree with Erhu about the strangest name coming from the public school system in the States. A teacher told me that she had two kids in her elementary school class, brother and sister. The kids were called “or-AN-juh-lo” and “lee-MON-juh-lo”. The teacher had a hard time figuring out how to pronounce the names, and so she asked the kids to spell their names:
orangejello and lemonjello.
Reminds me of a killer skit in one episode of the comedy show “In Living Color” several years ago where all the kids on the playground were named Clorox, Tide, Pepsi, etc.
Seeker4
Even simple, seemlingly normal names can be fun…
For example, I always got a kick out of my my colleague John Wang (pronounced with a flat). Even in reality he was a real cowboy…
I tend to get kids named after designer fashion stores. 
Just waiting until little Bennetton and Jordache roll into my room.
…met a guy in shanghai whose name was aaron. i asked him whether the name was from the bible, but he said: no, it was the first entry in the book of english names in the bookstore - he had no interest of thinking of a name himself.
there was once a chinese teacher at the school i was working at with the handle “dinky” … great english, and a good person.
i had to point out the meaning of the name when she said she was going to visit the states … she really had no idea.
OK, I have been tutoring this kid for a few weeks and everytime he said his name, I always thought he said “Kurt.” Last weekend, I asked him to spell it and he said, “K-U-N-T.” Is it bad that I actually taught him the correct pronunciation so all english speakers can get the humor out of this that I have?
I assume you explained it’s short for “Alex Ferguson” in English?
No, actually I said Doug Ellis
I met a Kunt once - an older fella who said he named himself after Immanuel “Kunt”!
Here are 2 names I encountered recently:
Eating
Lotion
I wonder if one of these got more teasing at school than the others:
Pity George Bush doesn’t have a son for her to marry.
A friend taught a female student by the name of Clitty…
The intellectual snobbery that spews from people when they hear someone with a mere college diploma has a desire to teach English in Taiwan is amazing. And yet the self-righteous egotists see nothing wrong with not only not objecting to these kinds of names, but even indulging in this practice.
And don’t give me that crap about who am I to say what a proper Anglicized name is. No birth registrar in the English speaking world would permit such names to be registered and you know it.
You people have no right to comment about the state of English or English teaching in Taiwan, or anywhere else, when you yourselves act so unprofessionally.
So how do you account for Moon Unit Zappa then?
I’m not a teacher btw, snob or otherwise. Could we attempt to stay on topic please? The thread is for a giggle at the names, not a debate on the ethics of choosing them for people. Thx.
I’ve seen plenty of names registered at births deaths & marriages. Not every cuntry has to be politically correct. People can choose any name they like. One of my friends named their son Crusader… not offensive but unusual. And some of the parents here insist that the names they give their children have been spelt properly.
PS I don’t think I’m an English teacher either, but I have a go at it occasionally…
Some dude hit on me the other day, called himself “Unique”. I didn’t tell him my name, I just said “Ok!” and left.
Met another guy working in a computer shop called “Showtime!” (I’m not sure how he spelt it…)
I met a guy who’s name was Table. Exciting huh.
Got a resume today from a guy called Karthik. Given the Taiwanese way with dipthongs this would sound like ‘carsick’, no?
“Hi, I’m carsick Wang”
“Please throw up somewhere else?”
[quote=“Dr_Zoidberg”]The intellectual snobbery that spews from people when they hear someone with a mere college diploma has a desire to teach English in Taiwan is amazing. And yet the self-righteous egotists see nothing wrong with not only not objecting to these kinds of names, but even indulging in this practice.
And don’t give me that crap about who am I to say what a proper Anglicized name is. No birth registrar in the English speaking world would permit such names to be registered and you know it.
You people have no right to comment about the state of English or English teaching in Taiwan, or anywhere else, when you yourselves act so unprofessionally.[/quote]
Er, I didn’t understand any of that but if it helps to calm you down the silliest names are often chosen by the people themselves.
I was walking through the street and stumbled across a kind of glass booth type thing that had some random white person teaching a bunch of kids. I love it how anything here that costs money has one of those huge glass front walls so you can see everyone inside and how much money they’re spending, like they’re some sort of shop display. This is me dining in an expensive restaurant. This is my daughter in a prestigious ballet school. This is my son in the best English school. Anyhoo…
I walked past one and the teacher had written the names of the children on the whiteboard.
At the top of the name was a kid called “Garryl”. A cross between Gary and Darryl. Both hideous names, which you’ll only find attached to people above 60 or so, or some random unfortunate people whose parents didn’t realise the names just weren’t cool anymore.
“Hi!” to everyone named Gary and Darryl out there! (Don’t worry, I have a crappy name too)