Bye bye wife (2012-2022), bye bye Taiwan (2015-2022) - it feels awful Oki

If the parties involved don’t make effort on it, sure.
One can’t expect that the relationship will work itself up without attention and dedication.

I’d say as much as one is willing to put, but I guess it’s up to @junoreactor in this case :wink:

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Thanks, @Brianjones! :slightly_smiling_face:

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I have a friend in the opposite situation. Married, moved abroad for a while, had 2 kids, moved back to Taiwan, worked at uber eats, etc.

Decided to leave the wife because he is literally doing everything while the wife doesn’t even work much (the wife teaches chinese every so often but when I see her she seems REALLY free, while the husband is out in the sun/rain working uber eats).

Now he’s between a rock and a hard place because the now ex wife still hardly works, and he still works uber eats to make ends meet. This can’t go on for long as he basically works 12 hour days to support him and the two kids. He lost basically everything in the separation.

I need to have a talk with him if he finds time, and brainstorm ways to lighten his load.

Thanks for sharing that information.

Women find neediness unattractive, and unfortunately, living in a foreign country will put you in that hole. If I’m in that situation, I’d try to take her back to the United States as quickly as possible.

Do you mean France? I think OP is French.

Oh yes. But if I were in a similar situation.

This also depends if the wife wants to be there. She may not. She is going to be 100% helpless there.

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Having a lot of sympathy for you man, hope you can stay strong under the pain and heal fast.

Now I’m gonna write a bit of a reality check. I’ll be honest, but it comes with the intention of nudging you to pull yourself up by your bootstraps.

Yes.

A lot of things you wrote gave out the vibe that you like to choose the path of least resistance. You choose a job that seemingly doesn’t require much competence. You’re now working to be a French tutor, which again doesn’t require much competence. For five years you were living in Taiwan without trying to become a functional member of society, or a functional member of your couple (as per what you report yourself and from what your wife said).

I’m stating this out loud because it’s better that you acknowledge reality and how your own behavior led you to be where you are today.

Once you acknowledge this and take ownership for the consequences of your actions, you can make a plan to get better and build yourself up as a functional, healthy human being. It might be scary to start building again and it might be scary to be so close from your 40s, but there’s still plenty of room for a happy life for you.

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I’m sure it’s already been mentioned. You can apply for APRC. You could have applied for it a few years ago. The fact you haven’t says your wife was using this to keep control over you. You can still apply for your APRC before you get divorced and get divorced and still stay in Taiwan. Whether you would want to do that is a different matter entirely. From what you’ve told us you don’t really go out or go visiting/sightseeing and mostly just stay at home working. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. All the things I like are in my home including my fridge with food and stuff in it.

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At least half this forum are language teachers.

I didn’t see what you saw.

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And that is why the competence level on this site is so … eh… high or low?

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I’m ten years older than you and feel exactly the same.

I hope you will not feel so bad about your situation as time passes. Eat well and look after yourself.

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A currency you can’t spend, that loses half it’s value within six months? Okay then.

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I have some reservations about the veracity of this post, or I’m too old or there are some inconsistencies in the post

13 posts were split to a new topic: Luxury gay space communists

Probably because they don’t want to out themselves.

Sometimes the man falls out of love
sometimes the woman falls out of love

It’s best when both fall in love and both fall out of love at the same time but the former is much more likely than the latter

Someone usually gets hurt
Love hurts

Really? 50% + 1?

Guy

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I personally just assumed most of us are retirees with too much free time. Explained the constant arguing 24/7.

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People connected to Taiwan now—including those of us on this site—are far more diverse than @OysterOmelet 's limited imagination.

Oyster, please come and visit Taiwan again when you can. It’s time to update your views. :grin:

Guy

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