Welcome to Crap Sanctuary. There’s only a few rules in Crap Sanctuary.
- Nobody talks about Crap Sanctuary.
- Whatever happens in Crap Sanctuary, stays in Crap Sanctuary.
- No pictures.
[color=darkblue]Great Moments in Crap[/color]
The year was 1939. The film Gone With the Wind entertained countless millions of people and garnered no less than ten academy awards. The high point of the film was when Clark Gable, as Rhett Butler, delivered that now immortal line: “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a crap.”
This has been
[color=darkblue]Great Moments in Crap[/color]
[color=green]Believe it![/color]
or [color=brown]
Crap on it!
[/color]
Lucy Belinger of Shaker Heights made a scale model of the Eiffel Tower with working elevators, entirely out of crap!
[color=green]Believe it![/color]
or [color=brown]
Crap on it!
[/color]
I had a pretty bad crap this morning. Not the motherload I was hoping for. Oh well. There’s more to come I guess.
Light a match. Aren’t you glad we have rule number 3?
[quote=“Dr. McCoy”]Light a match.[/quote]Doesn’t work! The Mythbusters tested it.
Mulled wine eh? It’s like funky Ribena. Or cranberry juice with a shot of gin and a crushed hot cross bun mixed in.
My day started out kind of crappy. I wanted to go to the bazaar at the European school. My wife thought it would be nice to take the HST to Xinchu. So we took the HST. I asked her what we were going to do and she said that we would just go there and find some brochures and figure out what to do. But they don’t have any stuff like that there. So we took a bus to some place called Zhuli or something. But that place is just a crap town with nothing there. And it was already after 2 and I hadn’t eaten so I said at least we can find a restaurant. So we asked someone and they pointed us down the street and when we got there the place was closed. By that time my daughter was crying. I guess she thought we were lost or something. We calmed her down with some popcorn and some binbon and a hotdog. I didn’t eat because I was holding out for someplace nice. We took the bus to Xinchu and fed the fish in the stream and then found a nice all day brunch place called Square’s. Then we took the regular train back.
It was a beautiful day and I had a nice breakfast and got to wear my mirrored sunglasses, so I enjoyed it. My kids thought it was kind of boring, but that is just tough crap I guess.
I wish I could go to the happy hour tomorrow, but won’t be able to make it. Crap!
Dr. McCoy, I’ve figured out you are the “real” McCoy.
[color=darkblue]Great Moments in Crap[/color]
In 1775 Patrick Henry convinced the Virginia House of Burgesses to commit troops the American Revolutionary War with his inspiring speech that ended with that awesome phase, “I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me crap!”
This has been
[color=darkblue]Great Moments in Crap[/color]
Contrary to popular belief Thomas Crapper did NOT invent the flush toilet
CRAP spelt in reverse is PARC.
And carp are just a transposition away from crap. They are dyslexic crap. So the next time you see a koi pond say, “Hey, look at the crap!”
Tsk tsk tsk
The power of crap compels you.
I have no idea what that means, but I like crap like that. Hope to see more of it. I hope this thread will some day be graced by some of bob’s stream-of-consciousness crap.
Another successful rescue from the temporary forum.
It was so cute. I just couldn’t bear to let it die. I only wish I could have saved the poll too.
Neither am I exhausted but rather could prattle along like this forever as per the normal progress of things and know that schizophrenics will some day be neither naked nor ashamed but instead clothed in armour like those guys in the 300 movie. Grand epics will be written in our honour and the over fed but under challenged will yawn while watching the movie version, yawning and eating popcorn. I lost the rhythm of this some time ago but press ahead regardless. Despite the advances of science farting too will remain a nuisance but not as bad as diarrhoea in that diarrhoea is a liquid whereas farting a gas with no relation to the rolling stones song. According to Hung-nin Samuel Cheung (a mouthfull in any language) author of “A Practical Chinese Grammar” language is a highly complex form of creative activity. It is replete with metaphors, which by their very nature, make the learning an interesting and thought-provoking experience. Boy you can say that again, though I don’t quite understand the first bit.
Thank you bob. I will try that one of these days when I feel brave enough.
Another successful rescue.
It is of course no secret by now that little b bob god of the abstract nonsensical, repetitive and subtextual is actually Jesus, but it may come as a suprise to many to discover that he is Buddha too, a fact that will be confirmed upon his upcoming trip to Varanasi and the outlying suburb of Sarnath where he gave his first sermons regarding the basic principles of Buddhism. They will be sure to recognize him there. Later he plans a trip down to the Ganges, which flows solid through this stretch owing to the Hindu practice of dumping the remains of their earthly vessels in the river in hopes that they (their earthly vessels) will not be suffering another go round the cycle of birth and suffering. His plan is to inform them that they will not be returning for another go round the cycle of birth and suffering anyway and could at least approach life with a more practical, compassionate view toward future generations. There is a thriving hemp industry in Varanasi, textiles, stationary and such and little b bob intends to make a significant contribution to the economy of the region in that regard thereby providing for the local population a means of sustenance etc.[/quote]
Now it’s free to live in the loving serenity of the sanctuary.
It’s Only Crap,
But I like it.
Yesh, I do!