Cryptic Simpsons Quote Extravaganza

Huh, shakes. You don’t know what you’re gettin’.

(This thread brought back by popular demand!)

Wait, I’m no missionary! I don’t even believe in Jebus! Let me out…oh, save me Jebus!

Season Eleven: Missionary Impossible

He’s hepped up on goofballs!

Life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.

“Me lose brain, why I laugh”

You mean the Mob only did me a favour because it expected one in return?

Gun Shop Owner: Sorry, the law requires a five-day waiting period. We’ve got to run a background check.

Homer: Five days? But I’m mad now!

I lowered the price because an escaped mental patient tampered with the bottle.

One I forgot earlier: :slight_smile:

Oh my god! I was wrong!
It was Earth all along!
You’ve finally made a monkey out of me…

Where’s the thing… the thing you use…to dig food?

And I can’t leave without my favourite:

No truth-handler, you. I deride your truth-handling abilities!

Well if it isn’t my good friend Mr. McCraig, with a leg for an arm and an arm for a leg.

It it don’t fit, you must acquit.

No, Homer! Don’t remove my British Charm Unit, without it I’m just a borish American clod.

mmmmm…forbidden donut…

Homer: So it seems the cat burglar was caught by the very person who said he would catch him.

Skinner: How ironic.

There are so many, how do you choose?


Ms. Krabappel:
“I believe that with persistent discipline, even the poorest student can end up becoming, oh, say, Chief Justice of the Supreme Court.”

“Chief Justice of the Supreme Court. What great men he would join. John Marshall, Charles Evans Hughes, Warren Burgher… Mmmmmmm… Burgher…”

(Episode: “Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie”)


“I didn’t think it was physically possible, but this both sucks and blows.”

(Episode: “Screaming Yellow Honkers”)


At its peak, that show was just pure genius! :bravo:

Skinner said the teachers will crack any minute purple monkey dishwasher.

My 2 faves…

1…(Singing) How many roads must a man walk down before you can call him a man?
Dad, its a rhetorical question!
Rhetorical eh?.. 8
Do you even know what rhetorical means?
Do I know what rhetorical means?

A deer!
A female deer!

Attorney Lionel Hutz: (played by the one and only phil hartman)

"Well, he’s kind of had it in for me ever since i accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace “accidentally” with “repeatedly”, and replace “dog” with “son”.

“Donuts, is there anything they cant do?”

Release the hounds.