Custody of Son

You can block a minor from leaving the country. Since Taiwan has exit checks and scans at the airports it’s easy to stop people if they’re on a list.

My in-laws were upset that I gave cold (iced) water to my son. I told them I’d stop giving him iced water and listen more to their superstitious bullshit if they would stop giving him cookies and chips. They didn’t stop and neither did I. I find this the easiest kind of way of dealing with cultural disagreements.

Admittedly, leaving your kid in a place where he might suffocate is at the far end of the scale…

I’m married in Taiwan, not USA.

Interesting.
However, I do believe there must be certain conditions to do so, otherwise it must be pretty wild west.
For example
Me (still married) could have put my child on that list to avoid my ex taking child to a stupid japan vacation shopping tour etc.

You’re right. I haven’t. My husband hasn’t gotten his Taiwanese passport, so I’m getting it in secret. I am also packing all important documents. I’ll look into keeping them at a friend’s house just in case.

A recent development: my husband is on board for moving to the USA so it would make divorce easier and he could NOT leave the USA with my son without my consent.

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Except he probably could because the USA doesn’t check your passport when you leave the country, and no-fly lists can be circumvented (e.g. Drive to Canada and fly out from there). Don’t get complacent.

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Regarding the legality of leaving without the consent of the other parent, it has been alluded to in other threads, both here and on Taiwanease.

http://www.forumosa.com/taiwan/viewtopic.php?p=970500&sid=24bc27f014191ed8b146867483bdbd9a#p970500

https://taiwanease.com/tw/forums/travel-release-for-one-parent-traveling-with-a-child-t8440.html

No one I can see has posted an actual link to the said law and while most people don’t seem to have experienced problems travelling as a single parent, others have said their spouse was called to confirm knowledge the child was leaving Taiwan.

My suggestion before even thinking of doing something like this would be to consult a lawyer. If there is indeed a law prohibiting this and customs call the husband, I fear a very unfortunate series of events might follow. Better to get all the facts first.

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Just for clarification

Is your marriage regristered in the states and thus, are you in TW based on a working visa or a JFRV ?

Whatever he is suggesting, i would be on high-alert.
I dont even blame your husband, maybe he is just not that matured and is more or less acting on his parents will who sees the grandson as their treasure.

Won’t let me post this unless I say something. Something.

Yes, but she said she is the sole breadwinner, and since her husband is so despondent, AND has NO passport of his own, ther eis a high possibility she is on a work visa or worse, no visa. Many Taiwan families withhold vital information from foreign spouses or “fail” to do the paperwork for them, would not be a first. That si why it is so dangerous when most of the information on the websites is in Chinese, or the documents to fill out require the family’s help.

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Good question! I got my APRC before I even met my husband for this (as well as many other) reasons. So I am in no way reliant on the marriage. I set everything up except for a prenup. So as someone else has alluded to I might be a bit paranoid…

Actually, I can read, write and speak Chinese to a degree. We speak only Chinese at home. My husband doesn’t speak English.

Thank you! I’ll continue looking into it. I’ve already laid the grounds for an emergency flight home. My father has had at least two strokes and recently almost a heart attack in the last three years. We have emergency plans for if my father has a heart attack, and they include taking my son to the USA to see his grandfather one last time.

Thank you. I won’t.

one of the only sound advice here @Mick . Too many emotional responses of people projecting and giving some potentially illegal and short sighted advice.

@Americangirl like some others said, please don’t make any rash emotional decisions without some sort of legal council. You seem to have the upper hand, you are the one with the job, you are prepared for a divorce as it sounds like your husband has no idea. Think things through, and time is on your side. Talk to a lawyer who specialize in this.

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Again, I say whatever. We’ve seen plenty of cases on the news and here on forumosa where people play by the rules and the final result is their estranged Taiwanese spouse takes the kid and does a disappearing act, leaving the foreign parent powerless and without any sort of rights whatsoever. Having dealt with a vindictive ex (thank god we didn’t have any kids) I know exactly what I’d be doing - and it doesn’t involve putting my faith in a system that’s stacked against me because of my nationality.

More importantly, removing a child from his or her domicile to a foreign country under false pretense and without the other parent’s permission might be a violation of U.S. law on international child abduction. Cultural differences over how to care for a child might be a difficult defense against such a violation. Since you’ll be on U.S. soil when the dust settles knowing U.S. federal law on the issue might be the most important consideration.

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I have no doubt, some courts may have some biases against the foreign spouse. But in the majority of the cases, when the foreign spouse gets an unfavorable decision, they are quick to blame the system being against them for being a foreign national. When most of the time, it’s their failure to protect themselves. I’m damn sure people are leaving out some key piece of information when they get an unfavorable decision. Whether if it’s the partner’s family not filling out the paper work, which is really the person’s responsibility to make sure it’s in check. Some issues like not having enough money, or just failure to prove they are the more responsible parent for the child and other things that are involved with the decision. Divorce is just ugly by nature, and even more so with kids. Hearing how unfair the divorce courts are not exclusively a Taiwanese thing.

Both my friends with crazy ex wifes and are men who are not native Taiwanese have won sole custody. They were able to prove ability to provide, more responsible, more stable and all of the other considerations. I seriously doubt a judge here would just rule in favor of the Taiwanese spouse for no reason other than they are Taiwanese. They might go into it biased sure, but they are still judges and in most cases rule in favor of what is the most reasonable decision they can based on the information given.

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This needs to be said, as so often the foreigner community states how stacked the cards are against them. I also know of a Singaporean woman who won custody against a very wealthy family, of course there is more to every story, but she had to fight it through all three courts, that’s how determined the in laws were, but she ended up winning.

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To many parents see a court ruling to be against them personally. When the ruling is based on what is the best for the child. If you can prove that you are more suitable and especially if the other person has done things that are not in the interest of the child. No judge would risk losing their career on making a clearly poor decision because one spouse is Taiwanese. its about what you can present to the judge.

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