Do Taiwanese ask you if your parents miss you?

Whenever they hear I’m unmarried and living in Taiwan, they always ask me that.

seems a pretty common thing.

my soon-to-be mother in law is still asking this question on a regular basis, after more than 3 years …

They always ask if I miss them.

Yes, always. It’s part of the ‘you-owe-your-parents’ attitude. Quite a lot of people in more traditional families put off going overseas etc. until parents die because they don’t want their parents to miss them.

On the one hand, surely loving parents wouldn’t want you to put your life on hold because they’ll miss you?

On the other hand, I never quite understand the owe-your-parents attitude (in the West, neither). I love my parents and I’m very grateful, but in all honestly I didn’t ask to be born. They decided to have a child, and raising that child is part and parcel of taking on the responsibility of having a child. I was born and live to fulfill a selfish desire my parents had for children. I’m very grateful for all that they’ve done for me, but it’s odd that everyone thinks I HAVE to be grateful…I suppose I could’ve been born to worse parents or not born at all, but the first wouldn’t really be up to my parents and if it was the second I wouldn’t be any worse off (ignorance is bliss and all that).


Agree with that totally…

In Buddhism it seems your family members are there because either you owe them, or they owe you in a past life (or lives). So it seems you always have to treat family members like they’re collecting their debt. Seems kinda stressful if you know what I mean.


I always tell them my parents disowned me at the age of 1.8.

My dad never missed me, but my mom did.

Ordinarily I’m slow and clumsy, but adrenaline can work wonders. As the beer bottle seemed to glide toward me in slow motion, I simply stepped to the side and watched it as it smashed ineffectually against the dresser behind me.

She didn’t exactly miss me with the broom, but I blocked it and was out the door before she could swing again.

She repeatedly missed me with a chair, but I don’t count that. It was too unwieldy for her, so I evaded it easily until she became exhausted and gave up. She should have just acknowledged her limitations and sneaked up behind me with the footstool. I considered telling her so, but then I thought, “Why should I give her a competitive advantage at my expense? She’s a grown woman and should be able to figure these things out for herself.”

Brilliant Charlie.