Drunk driving ex-con almost kills Forumosan in car smash

This post is long and involved and a little NSFW (only NSF young kids really) due to strong language… Pics of the crash are at the end…

A regular Saturday afternoon ride to Sun Moon Lake for a coffee was violently concluded by yet another inbred binlang chewing example of the human garbage that makes up the majority of the population of rural Taiwan… In the end result Captain Stag was extremely lucky to come out of it with his life, as were the 10 or so kids and old folks who by sheer luck were not killed by the drunken POS’s actions… Somewhat unsurprisingly in hindsight it happened in 國姓(Guo Xing) village, home of the mouth breathing peasants who were responsible for putting oil on high speed corners near their village that previously caused several riders of big and small bikes to crash, causing several serious injuries and one death…

On the way into Guo Xing there is a long downhill left hand corner, then a bridge over a river and after the bridge the road is lined on either side with the usual concrete box houses that face immediately onto the street. The road in the village is narrow and congested and only a fool would try to go any faster than about 50 or 60kmh, so for that reason and also since we are meticulous about slowing down through villages to avoid giving people more ammunition in their bigoted anti big bike vendetta, I had slowed down to under 60km/h as I came over the bridge… I had just passed two cars during the downhill left before the bridge, before the overtake I checked my mirrors and saw Captain Stag, riding behind me at a regular following distance… The next thing I was aware of was a resounding “boom” followed by screeching tires right behind me, my instinctive reaction was to accelerate to get away from whatever it was, and as I pinned the throttle, I looked over my shoulder to see a black sedan, skidding side on towards me at well over 100km/h, rotating through 180 degrees with smoke pouring off all 4 screeching wheels, I looked forward again for a split second to make sure I wasn’t going to hit anything and looked back over my shoulder just in time to see Captain Stag rag-dolling down the street along with his bike and the spinning car, before all 3 slammed at speed into the first house lining the street… The car hit backwards into the roller door/wall of the house, Captain Stag’s GS slammed into the support pillar of the house and bounced off into the street and Cpt.Stag hit the same pillar milliseconds later… In about 10 seconds I managed to get my bike safely stopped and turned around and back to the scene… just in time to see a Taiwanese guy bleeding from the forehead running toward me, away from the crash site… At the time I assumed it was an injured bystander… I was wrong…

I had mentally prepared myself that in all likelihood I would be about to start helping Cpt. Stag fight for his life, but that more likely that is was probably already too late… The speed of the impact and the car and bike and everything else all smashing to a halt, just seemed unsurviveable… When I got to him he was pinned under the car at the driver’s door side… I called 119 and gave my phone to a bystander and told them to tell the ambulance how to get to our location quick… Even though it’s over 15 years since I did my St.John’s First Aid training course, it all come flooding back to me with the adrenalin etc. I was utterly amazed to see Capt.Stag awake, conscious, responsive, breathing and seemingly alright… Airways, Breathing, Circulation were all fine, and he wanted to move to free his arm from the twisted position it was in, after checking his limbs and chest for signs of injury and breaks, and based on the fact that he was already alert and able to move his head by himself, I adjusted his position enough to get his pinned arm out, but left him on his side in the recovery position… He could easily move his head and his helmet showed no signs of significant impact so since he was semi winded and saying he couldn’t breath with his helmet on, I made the decision to remove it… I know that your not supposed to, but it was a judgement call, to be honest I’m not sure it was the best idea, but I figured that if he couldn’t breathe, everything else was secondary… also this being Taiwan I knew the paramedics were not going to have medical training or equipment much beyond what I could offer, so after triple checking his neck and head were okay, I very carefully removed his lid… Luckily for both of us, he suffered no back, neck or head injuries so there was no harm done…

Within 20 mins the ambulance crew arrived and the first thing they tried to do was drag him by the arms, after screaming blue murder at them, telling them to get the fuck away from him if they didn’t know what they were doing, they came back with inflatable limb supports, straps and a spine board and after immobilising him, we got him out, onto the stretcher and into the ambulance… By this stage the police had arrived on the scene and since Capt. Stag was doing miraculously well all things considered, I told him I’d deal with the scene and come to the hospital as soon as I could… Damn good thing I did, because the Taiwanese were about to demonstrate the caliber of their collective characters on a grand scale…

By this stage it had become apparent that the man I saw running away from the scene was in fact the driver of the black Mitsubishi… Scores of people had witnessed the incident with it being a busy little village with lots of people about… The cop who arrived was totally uninterested in me telling him that the driver had fled the scene and maybe he should arrange further units to try and find him, and unhurriedly began taking photos and measuring the distances etc. I went off the direction the guy ran to try and find him, but there was no sign of him… It took the cop about half an hour to finish his measuring and picture taking, upon which time he started talking to the assembled crowd, not to me… Luckily a few of them told him they saw the driver running and that I was witness to the whole thing… Eventually he started speaking to me… Suffice to say my Chinese isn’t perfect, but 100% fluent from 8 years of working here in a Chinese speaking company, having a Taiwanese wife etc… what I’m getting at is that communication was not an issue even though this cop was trying to make it an issue… Out of nowhere some random guy arrived at the scene well after the crash and from the opposite direction that we had come from and started telling the police that we were riding too fast and dangerously “racing” and almost hitting his car earlier when we raced past with our bike team… I explained to the cop that in fact there were only 2 of us and we were coming from the opposite direction to that claimed by the racist trouble causing piece of shit, and we were not speeding at all, in fact we had slowed right down… Luckily the nicer bystanders corroborated my story and the cop then ignored the guy… After a heated discussion I made it clear to the interjector that if he anything further to say on the matter that I may cave his head in then and there and that if he valued his safety and that of his fat ugly wife, that he should get in his car and fuck off immediately… He whined to the cop about this, but I denied saying anything…

By this stage about an hour and half has passed since the crash which occurred just after 4pm… Out of nowhere some guy appears and holds my hand… He then up and says, “Sorry, I hit your friend.” I told him to get the hell out, it wasn’t him who hit anything… He was insistent that he was the driver and he was very sorry etc etc… The cop who’s attitude had suddenly changed quite a bit came over and asked me if this guy was the driver, I told him is absolutely was not him, that the driver was bleeding from the forehead and was shorter than this guy… He was adamant that he was driving and I was adamant that he was not… After a further half an hour of this, suddenly his story changed and the started saying he wasn’t the driver, but the car was registered to him… Then out of nowhere the actual driver appeared, bloody forehead and all… The cops had pretty much finished with the scene and after confirming with me that it really was him at the wheel, they took him to the police station while I waited for the recovery truck to come for the bike which was in an extremely sorry state… They said they would keep him at the cop station until we could get there to make statements etc. At that point another of Taiwan’s lowest forms of filth in human form presented itself when I went to the little mom & pop convenience store right in front of the accident scene to get a Super Supao and a pack of smokes (even though I don’t smoke, stress and all that)… The peasant behind the counter up and says to me “you must go the hospital now!” I told him it was under control I had called my friend at the hospital and he was doing fine and I would go after sorting everything out at the scene and at the police station… “no, you must go right now, quickly.” Said the shifty looking little fucktard and placed a hip bottle of Jim Beam on the counter saying, "Give your friend Whisky to drink right away… It will make him better… go give it to him now…” Thinking the guy was just an uneducated hick with a few chromosomes too many, I ignored him since I had far more pressing issues to deal with at the time than his ramblings… It later became obvious that the shifty little bastard actually thought foreigners were that stupid since, the first thing the police did was send someone to the hospital to breathalyze Capt. Stag… obviously he blew a 0.0 blood alcohol, but afterwards upon hearing this, the ill intentions of the little convenience store laoban became apparent, the reprehensible little prick…

By the time I got to the police station they had just breathalyzed the driver who had blood alcohol of 0.19, but bear in mind that by this stage it was well over 2 hours since the accident and he had been missing for 1.5 of those… His blood alcohol at the time needless to say would have been significantly higher… On top of him being a drunk driving SOB, it turned out he was an ex-con who has just got out of jail last month!!!.. At this stage the police’s attitude changed, as did that of the driver and the guy who first claimed to be the driver who as it turned out was his younger brother… They had both given a statement (that he was just slowly driving along and accidentally hit the pole…) but since new Taiwanese laws are supposed to crucify anyone causing an accident while drunk, and the fact the he is already an ex-con must have sunk in and they realized the serious nature of what they were facing… Up until then they had both treated the situation with a comical casualness, as if it were just another minor inconvenience and all around bit of a joke… As soon as I arrived they began groveling and saying how sorry they were and how unlucky it was that today was the day fate decided this should happen to them… The driver was stumbling around with a mouth full of binlang saying how unlucky and “ke-lian” he was along with numerous “mei ban fa” “yun qi bu hao” utterances… At that point I screamed at him that he had chosen to get drunk and drive his car, he had chosen to try and overtake on the wrong side of the road at 120+ km/h and he had almost killed several people because he was a fucking idiot, not because of fate… I was angry and irrational and ranted that they shouldn’t assume that foreigners don’t have connections and that we were from Taichung and knew many of the “right kind of people” who could be paying their families a visit in the coming days and that should he “disappear” his family would spend the rest of their lives in tears trying to repay the debt caused by his selfish and irresponsible actions… That enraged his 10 or so binlang chewing mates who had arrived, but at that point I have little doubt the first one who had actually even flinched would have had a size 14 steel toe motocross boot down his throat faster than he could swallow his bin lang, the other 8 or so I’m not so sure about, but this was a cop station parking lot, so it didn’t amount to anything… The cops then kicked the rent a crowd hangers on out of the station and continued with the paperwork… Around this time a guy in the usual fake Lacoste shirt, phone and keys on the belt, clean cut, and pretty obviously an off duty cop arrived and started poking around the police station, trying to tell them not the include the photos of the scene, he also tried to take the breathalyzer print out but the station cops refused, perhaps because I was breathing down this guy’s neck every step he took, but didn’t ask him to leave or do anything else, suggesting he was a cop friend of the drunken fucktard… They initially insisted that Capt. Stag return to the police station immediately to discuss the issue, but after first I and then the doctor from Puli Hospital told them he was in no shape to leave the hospital, they relented and told him to come to give a report as soon as possible… I then left and after making sure the bike had been collected by the BMW break down truck, went directly to the hospital…

What had happened was that coming down the downhill left there were two cars driving right behind each other, far too close, as always… There were no oncoming cars, so I overtook them both in one move well before the bridge and moved back into the right lane… The rear car of the two was the drunken would be murderer… As Capt Stag went to overtake the two cars, the drunken fool tried to pull out to overtake the car in front of him, his fragile ego, innate TW male insecurity and blood alcohol content no doubt pushing him to right this “injustice” and “insult” of being overtaken by me and having another vehicle in front of him blocking his path… When he pulled out to the left to overtake the front car, he needless to say didn’t check his mirrors, since he almost wiped out Capt. Stag who was already in mid overtake, but he missed… that time… finding his overtake route blocked by Capt. Stag, the drunken idiot must have decided then to “undertake” the car in front on the right, down the bridge’s scooter lane… immediately after the bridge however there is a slight left turn into the village… At this stage crossing the bridge in the scooter lane, the drunken cretin must have been doing well over 140km/h as he overtook the car in front that was not going slowly (and may well have been known to the drunken asshole, I don’t know they didn’t stop)… then as he tried to swerve back into the car lane in front of the car he was overtaking, he was already out of control… the rear right of his car slammed into a rock solid concrete electrical post, causing the huge boom I heard and spinning his car out clockwise, diagonally aross the street, directly barreling into the rear wheel of Capt Stag who had long since completed the overtake and returned to the right side of the road, slowing down for the village and minding his own business… The impact destroyed the rear wheel/tire and swingarm of Capt. Stag’s substantially built BMW GS instantly, slamming him and his bike into the ground after which the car, spinning as it skidded, accelerated past him and his sliding bike, slamming into the house on the opposite side of the road some 60 meters further down the street, shortly followed by Capt. Stag and his bike… by a sheer miracle Capt. Stag was not crushed against the concrete wall and pillar by either the speeding/sliding car or his bike as it slid after being catapulted forward by the impact… By another amazingly lucky co-incidence there as no oncoming traffic who would have certainly killed Capt.Stag as he slid down the road and/or slammed head on into the spinning car… In a further amazing near miss, the car ended up with it’s rear half mangled and wrapped in on itself from the sheer force of the rearwards impact into the house, shattering a wooden chair… a chair that the old Ah-Gong who lives in the house told me he was sitting in, as he always does watching the world go by, until an hour before the crash when he went inside the house to help his grandchildren who were until then also outside playing near his bench… Had he and the grandkids not gone inside that afternoon for whatever reason they would beyond the shadow of a doubt been crushed by the car’s smashing into their front porch…

As it was Capt. Stag ended up in the ICU of Puli hospital for two days with a grade 4 (13cmx8cm) laceration to his liver, internal bleeding, suspected broken ribs, various cuts, stitches and grazes… He was lucky, unbelievably lucky… Only blind luck and good quality riding gear kept him from serious injury or death… He is still in hospital where he will remain for at least a further week or two…

Notice the level of damage indicating the speed… Also the broken wooden bench…

After bouncing off the pillar, this is where the bike ended up…

The rear tire exploded from the impact of the spinning car hitting it… Capt. Stag had no chance…

The front half of the bike is pretty much destroyed…

The shithead brother who claimed he was the driver…

The drunk driving, inbred, piece of human garbage who caused the entire crash…

Quite a story. Glad Capt Stag and everyone else is alive, I wish him a speedy recovery, and I hope the drunk will be prosecuted and sentenced severely.

However, it’s not just blue-flipflop wearing, binglang chewing, inbred retards who drive drunk. Lots of well-educated idiots do too – doctors, lawyers, judges, politicians, accountants, engineers, etc – in Taiwan and the West. The main thing I got from your story, aside from the obvious point about not driving drunk and the other obvious point that there are all kinds of liars and incompetents in Taiwan, is that it’s dangerous as hell to ride a motorbike. Be careful. :pray:

:astonished: Wow.

Glad you’re ok, and Captain Stag’s alive! A speedy recovery to you, CS.

What they said!

Definitely keep us posted on CS’s condition

Just get me the co-ordinates and we’ll call in an airstrike and level that place.

I don’t know how to re-act. :frowning: :frowning: :frowning: :frowning:

Really hope Capt. Stag is okay-bit into my lip when I saw his bike. Hope you’re doing okay brother! :frowning:

I really like this no-escape-from-the-camera thing going on these days.

Glad that CS is not banged up too badly and plasmatron, you have coconuts for standing up to all those dickheads.


Firstly, I’m really glad both you and Cpt Stag are OK.
Secondly, well done for, 1, knowing what to do medically (and stop others from doing the wrong thing), and, 2, managing to get that guy taken to the station despite all of the “obstacles”. You have my utmost respect, plasmatron.

That’s the type of guy that don’t blink when killing someone …

Bloody hell. I used to feel sorry for the residents of that village as they had it very rough during/after 921. Not any more. :raspberry:
Give my best to CS. I’ll try to make it out there this week.

First, I hope CS a speedy and full recovery and props to you Plasmatron. You did an amazing job in handling the situation. I’ve been in a very similiar type of accident twice in Taiwan. It’s always the same kinds of mother fucking binlang chewing drunk driving shitheads that do these stupid things. I’ve been lucky that at the time I was riding with buddies who helped me out. I still avoid riding alone for this reason. Man! After reading this story it makes me so mad. I just want to find the guys who almost killed me before and all the fucking idiot Taiwanese motorist and put them in a scene from the Saw movies. Keep us updated Plasmatron about CS’s situation.

Urrgh! A lacerated liver - and christ that’s no little nick! - is the road to bleeding to death internally. Thank goodness you got him sorted out.

While I unsderstand your rage, and of course I dunno how I’d react, I would suggest trying to keep a cooler head in a copshop if at all possible. Aside from that, fantastic job!


Plasmatron -
Thanks for the report. Words fail me here.
Glad Capt is not injured worse and wish him the best.
Your story is worthy of repro. Capt Stag is fortunate to have you as a riding buddy.

He’s right about it being an unlucky day… because I know that with you having a foot in this case the ignorant drunken fucktard is going to get exactly what’s coming to him and then some. Hope CS is up and running again soon and kudos to you for a level head and damn big pair o’ balls.

Plasmatron this is for you :bravo:

Calling All Angels

A man is placed upon the steps, a baby cries
And high above him you hear the church bells start to ring.
The heaviness, the heaviness of it settles in,
A mother starts to sing.

Then it’s one foot then the other as you step along the road
Steppin’ on the road, how much weight, how much weight?
And it’s how long and how far and how many times,
Oh, before it’s too late?

Calling all angels, Calling all angels.
Walk me through this one, don’t leave me alone.
Calling all angels, Calling all angels.
We’re trying, we’re hoping, but we’re not sure how…

Oh and every day you gaze upon the sunset
With such love and intensity.
Why it’s almost as if, if you could only crack the code
You’d finally understand what this all means.

Oh but if you could, do you think you would
Have traded all the pain and suffering?
Oh, but then you would’ve missed the beauty of the light upon this earth
And the sweetness of the leaving.

Calling all angels, Calling all angels!
Walk me through this one, don’t leave me alone
Calling all angels, calling all angels,
We’re trying, we’re hoping but we’re not sure…

Calling all angels (call all angels)
Calling all angels (call all angels)
Walk me through this one
Don’t leave me alone.

Calling all angels, Calling all angels
We’re trying, we’re hoping, we’re hurting, we’re loving
We’re crying, we’re calling,
But we’re not sure how this goes.[/quote]

Bloody hell!

I think you pretty much handled it all bloody well, plasmatron. :bravo: :notworthy:

I hope the driver gets his just deserts. :fume:

Don’t know how you kept your cool - I’d have lost it. :notworthy:

Sounds like you handled yourself admirably. I’m so glad to hear that Capt. Stag’s not too seriously injured. He has a lot to thank you for, I think, and you sure have my respect. Please give him my best when you visit him.

what a nightmare, CS is lucky to have a guy like you watching his back.


I don’t really know what else to say. Glad to hear that CS isn’t too badly injured. Good job with the police/ambo’s.

Unbelievable. I probably would have snapped and attacked one of these people who deliberately tried to pin the blame on me, like that convenience store owner.