Earth closest to Mars in 60,000 years

Martians turned out in droves last night to witness the closest pass of Earth to Mars in 60,000 years.

Every canal boat and mutant dome had three eyes trained on our neighbour. Scientists say the last time it was this close we were having the great Martian pancake day and nobody noticed.
Of course Earth is more familiar to many at the box office , made famous in movies such as

‘Great hairy two legged creatures attack’


‘Voyage to the Big Blue’

We asked some schoolkids what they thought?

  • It doesn’t look very impressive, more like a white dot than a blue one. I saw a shooting star once that lasted for 5 seconds!
  • It looked kinda cool in the telescope, like a great big blue blob
  • Earth is boring, there’s nothing there except water, everybody knows that’s dangerous…ugggghhhhh

Recently numerous book have been written claiming it is possible to create a friendly environment for us Martians. The best candidate would be to create a runaway greenhouse effect (martianforming) and evaporate all the water so we could dry the athmosphere and breathe the air. With special anti-G suits we could move our tentacles even under the crushing gravity on earth.

Someday we could all be singing ‘Here am I, sitting in a Tin Can, Planet Mars is red, and there’s nothing I can do’ on our way to our new home.

The Department of Home Planet Security is raising the terror threat level to “Red” at 3:00 am tomorrow as it is the best window that potential terrorists have had to attack us in 60,000 years.

[quote]Martians turned out in droves last night to witness the closest pass of Earth to Mars in 60,000 years[/quote]don’t you mean 32,000 years ? It’s 60,000 terran years.

Rentals of Bray Radbury’s movie, “The Earthian Chronicles,” were sold out as Martians once again considered, “Is there life on Earth, and if so, would we recognize it?”

Yes but in honour of our Earthian friends I used Earth years!

(MP - Mars Press) Millions of citizens scurried to their telescopes today as Earth made its closest past in 60,000 years. Enjoying a traditional meal of Phlank and Plurbstan, there was a general joy in the air that those of Earth were still unaware of life here on our fair planet. Said President Hhead Hhonchho, “This is one issue in which we want to be kept in the dark.”

And from The Jakarta Post*:

After Mars, telescopes parts lost in space

Euphoria at Mars’ closest encounter with Earth quickly turned sour for management of the astronomical observatory center Planetarium in the Ismail Marzuki art center in Cikini, Central Jakarta, as they realized on Thursday morning that essential parts of two telescopes were missing.

The missing parts included a 40-centimeter long Starfinder telescope and an eyepiece. Both parts were allegedly looted by an angry mob, who had turned violent after waiting their turn to gaze at the fourth planet in the Milky Way galaxy on Wednesday night.

Thousands of stargazers packed the Planetarium to see Mars at its closest proximity to the Earth. It is usually a calm place, where visitors can contemplate the intricacies of the universe with a handful of others. Astronomers say that the natural phenomenon previously happened some 60,000 years ago and will repeat in another 205 years.

Wildly impatient visitors smashed the glass panels of the building and entered the premises to take turns at gazing at the rare sight.

The management had prepared a 54-inch screen television set so that the planet could be seen by all visitors, as captured by the telescope. But how could they have anticipated that the seemingly peaceful preoccupation would turn into a frenzied kerfuffle for one of the best views in the city?

They sorely regret police personnel weren’t employed to safeguard the event.

*I like the part about the “fourth planet in the Milky Way galaxy.” :laughing: :laughing:

Life on Mars: