Female Pleasure

[bababa]

[quote=“Mucha (Muzha) Man”]… a quote from an article I read not long ago on the prevalence of oral sex amongst teenagers. The quote read, “No one ever cried from oral sex.”

The point was that regular intercourse brings us to emotional peaks that are not simply about pure sexual pleasure. There is something primal, something that touches the core of who we are during intercourse that cannot be duplicated just by stimulating the sex organs.

So, wherefore female orgasm? Is it always necessary during a sexual episode as the women on Sex and the City would have us believe? Or is sex just a whole lot more complicated than that and any attempts to treat it in a textbook way will result in pleasure, yes, but rapture, never.

As the personal ads say: serious replies only. [/quote]
Surely the quote was trying to encourage teenagers to have oral sex instead of vaginal sex, because oral sex is safer? No unwanted pregnance, no abortion, less chance of AIDS, therefore no tears.
However, as one of the 24 women left to reply, I have to agree with the “emotional peaks” part. It isn’t the orgasm, it’s the sexual connection of regular intercourse itself that is emotionally satisfying.

[Erica1973]

@Big Fluffy Matthew

[quote=“mungacious”][quote=“wolf_reinhold”]I have nothing to say until 25 different women reply here first.[/quote]are there even 25 distinct female individuals on this board?[/quote]There are more than 25 in the woman’s forum, where they are probably discussing this in private too, saying how we evil men don’t understand and don’t communicate.

read me
A funny joke I found today.

[Erica1973]

[quote=“bababa”]
However, as one of the 24 women left to reply, I have to agree with the “emotional peaks” part. It isn’t the orgasm, it’s the sexual connection of regular intercourse itself that is emotionally satisfying.[/quote]

As the second woman of the 23 women left to reply, indeed I agree with Bababa.

[bob]

Recently I have heard a number of people say “But Oral sex isn’t sex.” Well, now, it may not be sex, but it is awfull close you gotta admit. The “sex” part in oral sex should be a dead give away one might think. Anyway since we are on the subject of female pleasure I think it should be mentioned that a lot of women seem to derive tremendous pleasure from felatio particularly if a certain amount of rotation is applied to the sugar plum simultaneously. And then of course there always arises in these affairs quetions of whether to spit, swallow or hold tither and weigh nigh. You don’t often come across a swallower but by God it’s luscious treat when you do.

[Okami]

Good sex doesn’t necessarily have to involve liking or loving the person.

I prefer the emotional connection and the cuddling, then the actual sex and normally only orgasm about have the time, I have sex.

For women to have pleasure can be very easy or difficult depending on the woman and her attitude. I’m not sure if Muzhaman is talking about just sex or in a relationship and sex.

The most important part is too make her feel comfortable with what she is doing. She won’t stay around for great sex if she can’t handle going to church afterwards(this happened to me ). You need to get her talking about things, not necessarily her, but in the general direction. I was able to get a lot out of my first Taiwanese gf by using the stories of the sexual exploits of a really slutty Aussie guy. Now that you have her in the mood. Most women get their majority of orgasms from manual masturbation, showerheads(great Xmas gift), and oral sex. Vaginal intercourse orgasms are not as common as we all would like to see them. For some women, orgasms can be too pleasuable that they hurt or make them want to lie there and do nothing afterwards. Even blowing on their skin is too much of a sensory overload for them after they have an orgasm(my 1st Taiwanese gf hated when I did that ).

Touching is fundamental. Groping her breasts and trying to finger her is all good and all when she’s horny, but is not the way you should start out. I find light stroking of the legs, hands arms neck and shoulders are very key to getting that initial relaxation before you make her sqeal. It is very important to listen to her and ask her questions, not during sex though . The intimate cuddling afterwards is a good way to go over things she likes and dislikes. The most important thing is too read. You can learn a lot by reading and go over the ideas with her. If it is too far out there, than you can say that it’s not you, it’s the article.

Taking too much estrogen again,
Okami

[mod_lang]

Let her be on top.

Women reach orgasm a lot quicker in that position than in the missionary position. Just in my humble experience. She’s setting the pace so she knows exactly what angle and speed of thrust to move it around to maximize her pleasure. That is, if she’s experienced enough to know what she’s doing. The point is, let her lead and you follow, if you’re interested in pleasing her. Let’s face it, no matter what we do I’m going to get off one way or the other because it’s 10x easier to pleasure a man than a woman - so making sure she gets off takes precedence. However this strategy requires that she knows what and how to get what she wants…which a lot of woman aren’t educated/experienced enough to know.

[Sheila]

After reading over all the posts of this thread and being new, I just can’t get the this one thought out of my head…How is it that Sandman knows so much about how to seduce sheep?

It is very nice to see that men out there really do care about their partner’s pleasure. Reassuring stuff indeed!

[Jack_Burton]

Another few great techniques:

shout out someone else’s name during sex, preferably someone she knows like her sister (a variation of this is her on top, say the name, then hang on for dear life - this is rodeo style)

keep asking her over and over: are you there yet?

be sure to come prepared with surgical gloves, dental dam, and a strong light.

it’s best to do this with one beer in hand and tv on. that way you can multitask, and everyone benefits.

bring your buddy over for a little tag-team. it will show how generous and unjealous you are.

these have been proven to work!

[Grasshopper]

@bob

Anyway since we are on the subject of female pleasure I think it should be mentioned that a lot of women seem to derive tremendous pleasure from felatio particularly if a certain amount of rotation is applied to the sugar plum simultaneously.

I do believe you mean cunninglingus, as felatio is another word for blowjob. The only pleasure they could derive from felatio is knowing they are making their partner feel really good.

[Tigerman]

@Grasshopper

[quote=“bob”] Anyway since we are on the subject of female pleasure I think it should be mentioned that a lot of women seem to derive tremendous pleasure from felatio particularly if a certain amount of rotation is applied to the sugar plum simultaneously.

I do believe you mean cunninglingus, as felatio is another word for blowjob. The only pleasure they could derive from felatio is knowing they are making their partner feel really good.[/quote]

as long as we’re correcting… spellings:

cunnilingus aka muff diving, etc…

fellatio aka blow job, etc…

[Jack_Burton]

@tigerman

[quote=“Grasshopper”][quote=“bob”] Anyway since we are on the subject of female pleasure I think it should be mentioned that a lot of women seem to derive tremendous pleasure from felatio particularly if a certain amount of rotation is applied to the sugar plum simultaneously.

I do believe you mean cunninglingus, as felatio is another word for blowjob. The only pleasure they could derive from felatio is knowing they are making their partner feel really good.[/quote]

as long as we’re correcting… spellings:

cunnilingus aka muff diving, etc…

fellatio aka blow job, etc…[/quote]

and skullbuggery?

[gretel]

@Erhu

Also, society reinforces the idea that intercourse is all it takes to get a woman off. Society is totally geared towards men’s sexual preferences while ignoring or suppressing the desires of women. How many pornos have you seen where a guy manually stimulates the woman’s clitoris for the 10-20 minutes that it takes for a woman to achieve orgasm? I’ve yet to see that!

Women are labelled cold or abnormal if they somehow can’t achieve orgasm by intercourse alone, when the fact is that is not abnormal at all! While some pleasure can be had from intercourse, if there is no clitoral stimulation, the likelyhood of a woman achieving orgasm is next to nil.

Add to this the fact that some women themselves (particularly younger women) can be ignorant about their own bodies. Many women that I’ve talked to admit that they discovered their clitoris and how to orgasm somewhat accidently.

I recommend reading/seeing The Vagina Monologues, it’s all about female sexuality and the orgasm. It’s a total eye-opener.

I knew a guy who had a specific routine from which he never wavered, a handsome Lebanese guy. He was a little old fashioned - always had to be on top and in control (although some chicks prefer that) - but the program largely consisted of getting the woman off followed by a short period of intercourse after which he would blow. And that was it. But trust me, I don’t think many women would complain. It was a totally fair deal.

[maoman]

[quote=“tigerman”]as long as we’re correcting… spellings:

cunnilingus aka muff diving, etc…

fellatio aka blow job, etc…[/quote]
Quit being so anel.

[Tigerman]

[quote=“Maoman”][quote=“tigerman”]as long as we’re correcting… spellings:

cunnilingus aka muff diving, etc…

fellatio aka blow job, etc…[/quote]
Quit being so anel. :p[/quote]

Just trying to clear up some of the apparent confusion re these practices.

[sandman]

[quote]and skullbuggery?
[/quote]
Isn’t that what those Ivy League Skull & Boners get up to?

[bob]

Excuse me darlings but I know the difference between felatio and cunninglingualism. What I was saying is that yes ineed some woman do seem derive tremendous pleasure from FELATIO especially if you place your long finger atop their clitoris (everytime I put my finger on it it slips away but no matter) and rotate. It is or sort of tit (or rather clit) for tat situation that works out nicely sometimes. You should try it. It provides great motivation to keep that finger twirling.

[ImaniOU]

As woman number five, I have enjoyed reading these posts (although sandman’s made me a bit uneasy)…and no, I meant enjoy as in I am reading them only. If only forumosa men made up the majority of men out there who tend to ignore that little, ever-so-important goddess button. And what’s the best way to go about tickling it?

Four out of five women agree… (the fifth one’s a bit prudish, but she’s coming around)

[mwalimu]

One of my favorite Forumosans, Erhu, wrote:

[quote]Here’s an easy analogy:
clitoris is to a female as penis is to a male[/quote]

And labia is to female as scrotum is to male (analogous structures), but thankfully women don’t absent-mindedly scratch theirs as much.

The problem is a lot of guys don’t even know where the clitoris is located. I’ve seen studies where only about half of the guys asked could correctly identify the clitoris on a diagram of a woman’s body.

And they probably don’t know what the capital of North Dakota is either.

Women are labelled cold or abnormal if they somehow can’t achieve orgasm by intercourse alone, when the fact is that is not abnormal at all! While some pleasure can be had from intercourse, if there is no clitoral stimulation, the likelyhood of a woman achieving orgasm is next to nil.

You raise some very interesting issues here. Looking at the history of Sexology in the 20th century, your statement above seems to a bit trapped in the Kinsey Report era (primacy of the clitoris). And the oppresive notion that orgasm via intercourse is more “normal” is a legacy of Herr Sigmund and his dogma that such orgasms are “mature” compared to the more commonplace, and trivial orgasm through clitoral stimulation (phallic and therefore less essentially femimine).

I think contemporary understandings about female sexuality and the mechanism of orgasmic response, would tend to suggest that there are multiple roads to paradise, and clitoral stimulation is not the only show in town. I don’t think that any serious acadmeic in the field argues anymore about whether or not the G-Spot exists, and whether or not firm pressure applied there can produce an orgasmic response in many women. The current consensus seems to be that “genital orgasm” is a more comprehensive and correct term. But, hey, in the end, it’s all about the mind, though, isn’t it?

The social implications of our evloving understanding of female sexual response are fascinating. There have been massive acadmeic wars waged over this. People have staked and lost reputations on the whole Grafenberg spot issue, whether or not its analogus to the male prostrate gland, and whether female ejaculation is a result of urinary incontinence, or a unique event. And because every woman’s experience is unique, there is always the fear, as the understanding evloves, and as you pointed out, that some women might feel less adequate because they aren’t multiplly orgasmic, can’t achieve - or very infrequently experience “vaginal orgasm” and/or orgasm during intercourse, or because their G-spot doesn’t do anything for them. (And I wonder how many men and women can successfully identify the location of the g-spot on a diagram of the female body)

Then there’s the minority subset of women who enjoy orgasms that result from anal sex, stimulation of the nipples, general hot and heavy petting, or from vivid fantasizing.

I think you are spot on when you write about how essential it is for women to get intouch with their own bodies. I was amazed how inhibited and even prudish many women in Taiwan were when it came to their bodies, and the subject of self-exploration (so to speak). In my experience, the women who are often the most orgasmically switched on are those who got to know themselves early on in their maturity, and learned, for lack of better words, how to make themselves come.

Victor Hugo wrote, “The majority of husbands remind me of an Orangutan trying to play the violin”. I guess the lesson is that it’s not such a bad idea to know how to tune your own strings. And, Erhu, if you don’t have one in your life now, I hope a Paganini comes your way soon. “Erhu”, hmmm, a string instrument that requires a delicate touch…

Sorry, don’t have lots of time to write a more well-thought-out response today, Erhu. Off to see that Harry Potter flick. BTW, are you back in Da-lu, or did you decide to pack it in and go back to Taiwan early?

[Screaming_Jesus]

From the same folks who brought you the joke

Q: How many men does it take to clean a toilet?
A: None–that’s women’s work!

Comes this gem:

Q: How do you know if a woman has had an orgasm?
A: Who cares?

But seriously, chicks vary a lot. You’re just going to have to talk to them.

BTW I had a girlfriend once who didn’t KNOW where her clitoris was.

[mod_lang]

As a man with a tiny dick undresses, the woman giggles and says, “Who do you think you’re going to please with that thing?”

The man replies, “Me!”