I’ve noticed a recurrent pattern in my dating/ romantic life in the last couple of years. And it plays out like this…
I meet a girl at a pub/club/work or through mutual friends (in a less hectic environment). Generally they’ve all been warm, friendly, personable and easy-going. We subsequently meet up for dinner/one of many assorted out-and-about activities/a night at the pub/club.
Natural human chemistry comes into play, and we head home for an enjoyable romp in the sack. The angel on my left says “easy fella, no need to rush things”, the the devil retorts “go on bad boy, ya only live once”.
The next day I find it difficult to establish much of an attraction for the girl, calculating all the reasons why she isn’t suitable for me, and generally cool it down over the next few days, until communication ceases.
I find it hard to condone my behavior, knowing that I may have hurt the girl, because of my whimsical desireous (sp) nature on the night. In fact I’ve stopped seeing girls, for the very reason above.
What’s up with me? Emotionally immature? Emotionally insecure? Asking for too much? Rushing things? I have had three true loves - stable, loving, committed, long-term realationships. I believe the glue that cemented these relationships was that they were born of genuine friendships (friends first, lovers later).
You advice and suggestions please…