That’s funny as I did find my wife (of 7 years now) on Tinder.
Now we know who heavy metal singers are descended from…
Busted! 
(the Asahi is a nice touch)
It’s the chaotic neutral of 7-11 beers.
Nick? 
Don’t worry, @tempogain we still like you! 
EDIT: Oh wow. He’s real. (I thought this might be a fake)
Goddamn right.
New account?
Since I found her almost 8 years ago, that would obviously be an old account. 
I read it as you just went on Tinder recently and found her.
I thought both of you were secretly on Tinder.
Lol um no. I think I’d be looking up divorce lawyers. Besides, she’s 6 months pregnant, so she’s not exactly out clubbing (at least I think…?).
Congratulations!
Don’t you know? Everything on Reddit is real! The only reason why they don’t call it Realddit is because it doesn’t flow off the tongue.