Getting the stank out of my gloves

How to? They’re expensive Dianese ones, so I don’t want to just throw them in the washing machine (and such is the extent of the stank that the wife wouldn’t let me, anyway).

What’s the origin of the stank?
Mediocrity?
Despair?
Self-parody?
Be more specific.

Can you turn them inside out?
Doing so and then hand scrubbing them with some of that Cold Water Wash stuff will doubtless help.
You’ll kack when you see the gross colour of the water.
Rinse well, until the water runs clear.
Hanging in the sun for a couple of days thereafter should do the trick.
And STOP scratching your willnot-infested arsecrack whilst wearing them.

[quote]And STOP scratching your willnot-infested arsecrack whilst wearing them.
[/quote]
That’s been outsourced.
And what’s cold-water wash? I’ve done that and it doesn’t work. I need to use some kind of product I think. Lysol?

[quote=“sandman”][quote]And STOP scratching your willnot-infested arsecrack whilst wearing them.
[/quote]
That’s been outsourced.
And what’s cold-water wash? I’ve done that and it doesn’t work. I need to use some kind of product I think. Lysol?[/quote]
No Lysol, it’ll fuck them up, no, use this:

At home it would be Woolite or summit.

Oh. Cold Water Wash. Didn’t notice the caps. Thought you were just saying “rinse” in a wordy way.
It looks suspiciously like a laundry product, though. Snadman don’t do laundry. I’ll need something more manly as befits my good name. Maybe a whole box of Arm & Hammer? It works for our drains, the glove-stank of which is on a par with that.

How about you stop being such a smelly minger?

[quote=“sandman”]Oh. Cold Water Wash. Didn’t notice the caps. Thought you were just saying “rinse” in a wordy way.
It looks suspiciously like a laundry product, though. Snadman don’t do laundry. I’ll need something more manly as befits my good name. Maybe a whole box of Arm & Hammer? It works for our drains, the glove-stank of which is on a par with that.[/quote]

Oh wait.
You mean they smell like…you?
You never said they smell like you.
If that’s the case, I’d just bin them, nothing’s going to help that…

Outsource: take 'em to the cleaners.

They’ve already been fleeced.

Damn! I gotta hand it to me – I’m a FUNNY guy! :roflmao:
“Hand.” Geddit? Christ, I kill myself.

Skank Hands is not a bad name for a band member. Skank Hands, Minty Trousers, Dizzy Fingers, and Johnny Fromage are: Sans Frontiers.

You could get those guys from Spinal Tap to play a benefit gig for your fragrant mittens. You could call it “Smell the Glove”.

Um, cover your hands with detergent and then put the gloves on and work the gloves in a bucket of warm water for ten minutes or so. then rinse several times, because it’d be no fun having bubbles floating out of your wrists whenever it rained, or not being able to keep your grip on the throttle.

[quote=“urodacus”]You could get those guys from Spinal Tap to play a benefit gig for your fragrant mittens. You could call it “Smell the Glove”.

Um, cover your hands with detergent and then put the gloves on and work the gloves in a bucket of warm water for ten minutes or so. then rinse several times, because it’d be no fun having bubbles floating out of your wrists whenever it rained, or not being able to keep your grip on the throttle.[/quote]
OK. But I’m warning you – if I get contact dermatitis as a result I’ll come over to yours and rub my scaly cornflake-skin hands all over your body.

Well, you could wear some dishwashing gloves or similar as a hand condom, if you think you’ll get some reaction.

It’s really hard to clean gloves well. perhaps the first thing you should remember is not to use them in place of toilet paper.

[quote=“urodacus”]Well, you could wear some dishwashing gloves or similar as a hand condom, if you think you’ll get some reaction.

It’s really hard to clean gloves well. perhaps the first thing you should remember is not to use them in place of toilet paper.[/quote]

First thing you should remember is to read the first page of posts…

“I thought you people lived at a school??”
-Magneto

I have washed leather gloves with Woolite and then treated them with Dubbin to replace the leather oils that the soap removes and they have been ok. I washed them by washing my hand in warm water while wearing them. Lots of dye came out, but after the Dubbin they were supple and waterproof again.

These leather? I assumed they’d be some plastic ballistic polymeric kevlar composite crap.

If they are NOT leather, you might try a soak in biological washing powder, since I’m assuming (as has been suggested above) that the offensive odour is …er…of biological origin.

I wouldn’t do that with leather though, since it is too.

I gived tham a good scrubberoo with some kind of antibacterial wash crap I found under the sink of all places – who knew such places existed? They’re soaking now. Backs are some kind of mesh with kevlar bits, palms are softee leather. The water’s already black and stinking like a Banciao sewer.

Get some leather conditioner once you dry them out. That will help avoid them picking up too much sweat. I had to do it to the handles of my breifcases or they started to smell.

Boys are funnee.

If you wash leather gloves, they won’t shrink smaller than your hands. True fact.