Giant Meteor Headed Our Way


#1

On the news this evening was a story about a giant meteor heading toward earth.

It has a 250,000 chance of hitting earth in the year 2019.

To put that in perspective, we are 136 times more likely to be wiped out by this space rock than win the Taiwan lottery (if we entered).

We are 5 times more likey to be killed by it than die in a China Airlines flight.

When you consider the amount of effort people expend trying to win the lottery or for that matter improving air safety you would kind of hope that a little more energy would be expended on protecting the entire world from a disaster more likey than many forms of cancer.

The purpose of this post is to recruit volunteers to be trained up and rocketed on to the surface of this mother!

I only hope there’s a few Americans out there who can take up the mantle on this one. You know who you are fellas. O’Brian are you ready man?! I want you to lead this band of no hopers. When you get up there fellas you know there’s a good chance none of you will be commin back a live. I want ya to put those kinds o’ thoughts outa ya minds and concentrate on the job at hand. Which is…? Chipin’ away at it.That’s right boys we ganna be given ya picks, shovels and crow bars and we want ya to pry that mother in two. Hey and do what ya can to leave Thyrdrail stranded on it. Give him a couple a flags to hold and than just pry him off in to space no harm done there. O’Brian if you make it back we’ll be proud of ya man.If ya don’t we’ll what can we say …thanks buddy.


#2

Looks like there going to have to send somebody up to stop the bloody thing. I vote Brice Willis.


#3

REPENT YE SINNERS FOR THE END IS NIGH!


#4

FOOLS!

I, Dr. Botonus, leader of the Gargoyle Gang have sent this meteor to destroy you! For years we have plotted to overthrow your puny civilization, awaiting the day when Emperor Guillotine. Within the rock of this tumbling sphere lies none other than The Nucleon, which will destroy your planet!

Yes, you have Giant Robot and that little brat Johnny Sokko. But you will fail–Fail I say!

We will rule the world! Prepare for complete destruction! HA HA HA . . . !

Click now to see the horrors which will be unleashed!


#5

Where did that come from? Man, you gotta get a grip on yourself. Someone’s gonna think you’ve got issues, or somethin’. As for the giant asteroid careening towards our planet, don’t worry about it. We’ve got enough nuclear weapons to blow up the moon, so a little piece of rock would hardly be a chore for our stash of destructive U-238 atom-smashing death rockets. While we’re at it, maybe we can round up some of the most reviled dictators and criminals in the world, and stick them all into capsules at the tips of these warheads. Then we’ll be rid of the asteroid AND a lot of the world’s problems. I say BRING IT ON!


#6

Asteroid may hit Earth but don’t panic yet
http://www.cnn.com/2002/TECH/space/07/24/asteroid.encounter.ap/index.html

Last month an asteroid the size of a soccer field missed the Earth by 75,000 miles


#7

This ain’t no ordinary soccer field size create a smallnuclear explosion piece of rock. It’s nearly two miles across and if it hits earth we’re goin the way of the dinosaurs.

Looks like Mo’ Jo’s got his mojo crankin’. Thanks for your quick responce fella. You’ll be in charge of rocket command. Love ya attitude buddy. Good thinkin to round up a few meglamaniacs while we’re at it. But where’s ya crew good buddy? There’s no point in just sendin up a bunch o’ rag heads. God knows what those guys are capable of. They might just go right ahead and ride that mother directly into the planet.


#8

Turns out that it’s going to miss as surely as if it was fired by a Taiwain police marksman. Might be a chance in 2060 though

There a 1km wide rock that has a 1 in 300 chance of hitting in 2880


#9
quote:
Originally posted by Fox: It has a 250,000 chance of hitting earth in the year 2019.

O’Brian are you ready man?! I want you to lead this band of no hopers.


If O’Brian’s leading the group, I hope the team will be homogenous, Wonderbread white, and all American vets (instead of them multinational U.N. troops). BTW, O’Brian will be about 76 years old by 2019, so I guess he should bring a set of “space walkers”.


#10

it’s gonna miss us…ok then…then long term investing is still a good idea! whew!


#11

Not so fast! There are billions of those things floating around our arm of the galaxy. It’s only a matter of time before history repeats itself. But we ain’t no dinosaurs…that is…at least, not ALL of us are. We can see that thing comin’ a million miles away. All we gotta do is send up former president Bill Clinton to talk to it. I mean DAMN he’s such a good talker. I’m sure he could talk that thing into goin’ a different direction.


#12

hell, we could probably talk bush into going. just get him to lie, say somethin like,“i know it looks like a planet, but it’s not a planet. it’s 'merika! whydoncha go hit that RED one o’er there?”


#13
quote[quote][b]BTW, O'Brian will be about 76 years old by 2019[/b][/quote]The aging O'Brian may act like a cantankerous old coot, but everyone knows that he's still the great American Hero, fiercely loyal, exceedingly courageous, and wily like a fox. Go you Space Cowboy you, I know you can save us.