It’s not a matter of being able to do it. It’s a matter of justice, using big words. Is it ok for a school to send students in a place with no water and electricity, for a obligatory school course? For me the answer was not.
1 Like
finley, sure! Show up in a disaster zone and add to the burden of the local people! “Hi! You don’t have enough food and water and power! Can you provide for us?” What could possibly be wrong with that?
schwanification, you’re in a tough situation now - it’s not fair that you are, but unfortunately you are. I’d be looking out for some kind of unpopular task that you can do “for the class”. At least you can, in their eyes, balance the scales a bit. Volunteer for every shit job you can for the next couple of months. (I have no idea what those tasks would be, but I’m always surprised at what bizarre things university students here are expected to do.) Also make sure your friends in the class know your reasons - and hope that they say good things about you behind your back.
Not going wasn’t a mistake at all. Maybe, just maybe, you made a small mistake by not doing more before the summer camp with the “Look, we’re going to seriously inconvenience local people who are already in a bad situation” - but even that should be seen as pretty trivial. Alas, grudges, as absurd as they may be, can run deep.
Ignore them, the year will pass quickly and they’ll move on to some other issue in a couple of months anyway.
3 Likes
I agree with you and Finley that maybe I should have tried to convince them of the absurdity of what this summer camp became to be, I was naive enough to think that they would share my views 
I just hope the teacher won’t be too difficult with me too, I have to take one of his classes this semester 
. I’m kinda worried he would be “petty”, since he also commented on me while I wasn’t there.
I hope I won’t need it, but is it there in Taiwan universities an office I can talk to if I have problem of this kind with a teacher?
I think your reasoning was perfectly logical and sound. You should not have gone.
For Taiwanese social consumption, though, the best thing to do would probably be to “blame” your parents – say that they forbade you to go. There is absolutely nothing unusual about a child still obeying parents far into the 20s (30s sometimes even later). The family still has a very strong say in things after marriage (the “official” mark of adulthood) in many cases.
Then you can counterattack with “Oh, you thought all foreigners were unfilial? That’s rather stereotypical, don’t you think?” and no matter what happens, the conversation is no longer about whether you went to an ill-advised “activity”.
There should be a foreign student office at most universities, but not all. Check and see if your school has one.
5 Likes
I had a situation, a bit different from yours, but maybe related. At the time of Typhoon Nepartak, i had two working-holiday young adults here from Taichung. As i live in the mountains, i evacuated them and paid for their accommodation for the night at a safe location.They were fine. I then gave them two extra days off to recover coz no-one got much sleep the night of the typhoon. After that, they said they wanted to leave coz ‘their parents were worried about them’ - and they were ‘tired’. I was disappointed coz I had a stack of post-typhoon work to do but they left me in the lurch, even though the danger had passed.
As for your school camp, i wonder about your ‘didn’t want to be an inconvenience’ justification. On the contrary, keeping the kids occupied while their parents worked to recover from the typhoon may have been a big help. In addition, i wonder did your classmates also participate in some clean-up and reconstruction efforts while they were here? I suspect they may have as it was virtually impossible to carry on with normal life in the immediate aftermath. That would have been greatly appreciated if they did.
I don’t mean to make you feel bad - i don’t have enough information on your situation to make a judgement - but you’re obviously a bit torn about your response already coz you’ve posted here and wonder yourself if you’ve not done the right thing. If you think that in retrospect you may have erred in not going - that’s ok - everyone makes mistakes. - the main thing is to accept that and make a better choice next time.
Great advice!
You owe no one for the choices you made. My opinion!
2 Likes
You don’t keep kids occupied while their parents are recovering from a typhoon by TAKING THEM INTO AN AFFECTED AREA. If the OP had been going to take those kids to a place that had not been hit by the storm, that would have been entirely different – and indeed the OP would have gone through with the whole thing then, because it would not have conflicted with common sense.
If the OP is torn, it’s because of the group shaming going on among the classmates, not because the OP made the wrong choice.
Firstly, i am not judging the OP because i don’t understand the situation. It’s not very clear from what he/she has written. If they took a bunch of young kids to Taidong city 48 hrs after a major typhoon then, yes, that’s strange, and i’m extremely surprised the parents agreed to it. I had assumed that the OP is at some kind of teaching college and as part of their course they went to Taidong to conduct a school camp for kids that already lived in Taidong.
good advice in this thread. i would just stick to my guns if i did the same as you.
the herd mentality here is retarded, simple as that. most company’s here get free slave labour because nobody has to balls to stand out and say no.
The reality is that her classmates perceive this as an issue, not incomprehensibly mind you, and are acting accordingly.
Your best bet is to accept this and move on with your life IMO. You made your call, they’re making theirs, and there is little that can realistically be done at this point. If it mattered that much, than the obvious course was to go. You didn’t–and I doubt I would have under the circumstances–so study hard, ignore them, and let reality take its course.
1 Like
I am uncomfortable with that. The information from the OP is confusing at best and yet, without hearing the many other sides to the story from however many classmates there are that did go to the school camp, people here are jumping to condemn all of them. Why? Because they are Taiwanese and therefore ‘retarded’? (and btw, i don’t like that term).
2 Likes
I wrote it yesterday and then didn’t have the time to post it. IronLady anticipated me, I am indeed torn because of my classmates reaction.
“I am torn, but probably for different reasons that you may think. I probably sound selfish because in Taidong there were people to help…
still I had no training of any sort, my classmates had to be helped first before they could help (even if they did take care of some kids during those days, in the end),
I found it profoundly unfair and I didn’t feel I should go for many reasons that I already talked about.
On the other hand, I struggled one year to be part of the “friends” group my classmates have and now I found myself hopeless to be integrated.
I wonder if going would have really changed anything, I’ve been feeling very uneasy with them all year long, or if it was just a matter of time before a difference in views, positions etc. would have changed their relations with me.”
Next time I’ll just blame my parents hehe, thanks for the advice. Anyway, I’m sorry if the information are very unclear but I’m trying not to tell too much and be easily recognized.
I wouldn’t say retarded. Sometimes the mentality is so very different that it seems hard to conciliate with my culture. My struggle is to understand when I should “meet in the middle”, when I should embrace theirs and when I should “preserve” mine.
So, Schwanification, you mentioned that your classmates ‘took care of some kids during those days’. Just to be clear, your University took those kids from Taipei to Taidong to an AFFECTED AREA, as Iron Lady says, or you went as teachers to Taidong to teach and take care of kids that already lived in Taidong?
Also, was the camp in Taidong City? What date did it start exactly?
I hear you, OP, on the “I did everything I could but never made it into my classmates’ friends group.” Been there, failed to do that, no matter what…
Good news is, I lived and didn’t even need a bunch of expensive therapy. Just remember that you are not Taiwanese and (I assume) don’t want to be (completely) Taiwanese in thought, customs, etc. Get along with people, be pleasant, learn from them and with them, but just don’t expect to be admitted to the inner sanctum. If it should happen, that’s a bonus, but I wouldn’t hold my breath. One-on-one friendships are more likely than getting into a group of kids – college students are still kids in Taiwan. It takes a lot of maturity to handle the idea that someone whose “normal” is different from yours can still truly be part of your group of friends.
2 Likes
well i would consider working for free when you don’t have to nothing less than retarded. this situation sounds pretty similar to a work situation when you do something you dont have to for zero benefit, just because everyone else is.
thats nice that you think its great, your boss must love you.
I’m not the OP, but I know universities here often have summer activities where university students go to “disadvantaged” (poor? mountainous? aboriginal?) areas to “teach” the local kids for a few hours, perhaps over a couple of days. The teaching isn’t high level - it’s fun and games, not too far off what happens in English cram schools (not that that’s necessarily a bad thing).
My impression is these summer camps are somewhat well-intentioned but really not useful semi-charity work - a feel-good moment for the university students, and a mildly interesting afternoon or two for local children. And if I were an official in a community recovering right after a typhoon, there’s no way I’d want a bunch of hapless university students coming to town to play with the children for a few hours. The local children would probably be more competent and helpful in an post-emergency situation - the university students would just be a hassle.
schwanification, what you need to consider: some of your classmates are forming friendships that will last their lifetimes; lots of my middle-aged Taiwanese friends still have regular get-togethers with groups of university classmates. Do you care about that? If not, just keep your head down, do your thing, and endure the year. This year may seem long, but in a few years, it’ll seem like just a brief moment.
If you do care, you’ll need to work to get back in the circle - ironlady’s “My parents made me do it” is a perfect suggestion. And do what you can to help “the class”. You may or may not get (back?) in the circle, but perhaps it’ll be a less lonely year. It’s unfortunate that “the class” here exists as such a social entity, and if you’re stuck with this lot for many hours a week, it can indeed be miserable. Good luck.
1 Like
I’m sure this scenario was in a Lindsay Lohan film. The solution is to hold to your principles but get a make-over (new clothes, hairdo, high heel shoes etc.) so that superficially you look really cool.
Then you go into school, flirt with some guys, and school those bitches with some sharp witty put downs.
But remember to stay true to yourself.
4 Likes