Gits Ferrari's Third Book: Spastic Entitlement

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The sequel to Not SARS Just Sex! : The Oil Sands of Alberta by Gits Ferrari

Here’s just a taste of the introduction to my new book:

Spastic Entitlement

by Gits Ferrari


As humanity basked in the alpenglow of the event horizon that marked
the end of civilization as we knew it, Gits Ferrari spent most of his
time delving in muck-pits of obsessive compulsive narcissistic

As his home nation the USA participated simultaneously in three wars
in order to increase the cost of energy, and as the worlds fastest
growing demander of energy, China, inched past Japan into the #2
global economic position, Gits used 45% of actual brain capacity to
enlighten himself that life would never be the same again.

He closed his eyes and floated silently through the crisp autumn air
over the dark city, looking down at the ants in the streets. Then
Gits used the other 55% of his brain to ignore any plan for the rest
of his life.

Wouldn’t the year 2012’s world destruction, rapture, or just plain old
death stop Gits from spending every last New Taiwan Dollar he’d
possess before he ceased to exist altogether anyway?

Suddenly, none of that mattered.

© 2011 White Monkey LLC

Read Gits Ferrari’s third novelic installment: Spastic Entitlement

Gits Ferrari’s Third Book is under way!

Hey guys!

Due to popular demand, I’m almost finished with the third
installment of the Gits Ferrari trilogy, which focuses on
LEAVING the USA, working , living, and DATING in Asia.

My current books are listed below, and both available at

Not SARS Just SEX! - A Novel about Life in Taipei during SARS


The Oil Sands of Alberta - The sequel to Not SARS Just Sex!

both by me, Gits Ferrari

Follow a US expatriate living in downtown
Taipei during the breakout of the SARS virus.
From 2001 to 2003, our protagonist goes from
hero to zero in this line up of bad luck and
crazy times enjoying the night life of Taiwan.

A true story of a modern day pioneer
following his dream, who gets sideswiped
but not stopped by reality in Asia.

Gits Ferrari takes a Gonzo approach telling
his unique story about life in Taiwan.

Land of wicked ass. Formosa.

The sequel:

Continue the adventure with a US expatriate
as he avoids working as a teacher by joining
an investment company in Taipei and later
becoming the CEO of an energy company in
Canada. While doing so, he gets caught up
with the most scandalous group of businessmen
he has ever encountered.

He ends up making the easiest decision of his life.

Check out my free eBook:

Hey Gits, where can we get Part III? I mean, other than online? Will Alleycat’s stock it?

Preview: Gits Ferrari’s New Blog: Horny guy in Taipei
Gits Ferrari’s New Blog:

Sample post:

Horny Guy in Taipei

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Um, you can’t do that in here.

I took an “I Speak English” taxi to Tianmu to meet Henry for dinner at Alleycats and had three pints of cider. He told me about a chick in Kending he met camping. Then he’s like, “By the way, our friend Gungho ate a chick out on the bar at Carnegies.

I got back to Taiplex in time to listen to the sticky shrill of the violin being practiced from the 2nd floor, and called Zag to confirm the story about Gungho. Henry, Zag and Derick were all there to witness it. Zag told me, “One minute there’s this hotty in a tight white dress and like most people, Derick and I are looking at her because she’s ridiculously hot and you can see her nipples pressing through and she’s dancing on the bar sexy and keeps going down onto her honkers (like squatting), right in the middle of the bar. She comes down and basically sits right down and shows everyone she has no knickers on and is perfectly shaven, then stands up again. So she keeps doing this and looking at people seductively and Gungho, who is standing near her, stands directly below looking up at her. She looks at Gungho as she goes from squatting to standing and running her hands all over herself. Next time she did it Gungho was very close and got right down and tucked his face right in there. This time she doesn’t go back up again and starts properly enjoying it and he sorta readjusts his head for a better angle. She finally fell to her butt and wrapped her legs around his head.

At this point everyone is staring, wondering “What the f**k?”. Even the music stopped. It was a deathly silent moment. I was gobsmacked and all heads were in that direction. After a while I started to look at peoples expressions just because I have an odd voyeur obsession with Carnegies and I could see the DJ, well confused, looking at me but only because I was in the way of his view of what was happening. Then behind Gungho, I could see Liam, the bouncer, walking slowly up with a sort of wry smile on his face, mixed with a chuckle. He slowly goes up and leans over and has a word in Gungho’s ear. I was right there, so I heard something like ‘You cant really do that in here.’ but he was semi laughing. Then all of a sudden Gungho just pulls his head away and turns away with a Cheshire grin like the clever cat that got the cream. She climbs off the bar a bit embarrassed and shocked and runs straight up to the DJ, her soon to be ex “boyfriend” by the looks of things, and hugs him.”

Gungho became a legend after that. There was even a short-lived foreigner band called “Gungho” touring Taipei after that.

I got a little sex crazed from his story and walked out of there with a boner, laser eye-balling every female on the MRT train. No chick dare take on my stare. It had been a while for me, and I just wanted to have sex with any female.

At that point, I would have f***ed Monica’s boss Cat. I didn’t love her, but I’d say anything just to get down her pants. Primal urges had removed any earlier form of gentlemanship. I was stalking the streets with a new hunger, looking in every window. There was potential everywhere.

My groove was broken when I went to the wrong 7-11 and experienced reverse discrimination. I was getting frustrated trying to communicate with the guy about how much I had to spend to get another free Hello Kitty magnet, and he’s pulling this “I’m not sure, next customer!” and there’s this line behind me. Finally I had to start banging on the counter to get his attention. “I’m next. I’m the next customer!” I screamed, then I continued pounding my hand on the counter. It’s time to leave Taiwan when you find yourself throwing fits in 7-11s for Hello Kitty giveaways. I’ve seen people whining for less though. Just remember if they have the offer again that purchasing a 1.75 liter bottle of Absolute Vodka and a pint of Häagen-Dazs Rocky Road equals ten Hello Kitty Magnets.