As we all know, Mr The Chief and Mr Tommy have been colluding on a new self-help/cookery book. Being fountains of psychological/gastronomic knowledge I thought it fair that they share some of their expertise with the rest of us plebs.
So, if any of you have questions pertaining to recipes, ingredients or any other aspects of self-help, be sure to post them here! Our resident gourmands will be happy to share their extensive know-how with you!
Hmm, I’m trying to think of two souls I’d trust my dinner or my problems with … drawing a blank. If I got some wee girls whose skirts need looking up, or some beers I can’t finish, I’ll PM yas though. 
When I fricashure my home-grown moustachacka, I keep stabbing myself through the ankle. How can I prevent this?
Every time I cut onions I start crying. Is it because my mother looks like an onion?
So that’s what that Transvestite revenge thread is all about.
Tommy, shut the fuck up.
I want to bake some German Christmas cookies, but the recipe calls for unsalted butter and I only have salted butter (from Land’o’Lakes, i think they mean Minnesota) in the fridge. How should I remove the salt from the butter so the cookies taste great?
Just bake the cookies as usual.
Then run the cookies through your desalinator.
More important . . . Save the Land o’ Lakes box. You see the Indian Squaw on the box? Fold the box so that her knees are where her breasts should be.
Cool, huh?
jimi? the chief? Can I be part of your good cooking team? I’ve got a four toaster and a minor in peanut buttology.
Wait, wait: that makes her look like she’s got really big nekkid bazoongas. 
Ooh, you ARE naughty. But I DO like you…
Can I order some of those Shut The Fuck Up Sexy Girl Video cookies?
It’s not real until Tommy posts a YouTube video link.
Watch this space…
I can totally see it. I predict spin-offs such as BBQ aprons, a range of hot sauces with naked women on the label, “the chief” oven gloves… It’s a surefire MONEYMAKER!
Mr The Chief just has to spill some sauce down his apron on the correct letter and he’ll be “the chef”!
Tommy can handle the “issue” people by changing the first letter of his name to “M”.
Can the humor-impaired enter this thread?
Yes. Now you can guess.
As long as they don’t temp it.
What’s in the secret sauce?
Man, if you look at it in the mirror, this thread has PMET written all over it
Don’t be childish, Mr Urodacus. This thread has nothing to do with Post-Meteorological Epiphany Triumph.
There are questions that need answers, and NOW!