I woke up this morning and realised I have no friends… don’t pity me please, I am not sad about this just curious how others cope. I also don’t think I am alone, I guess many lifers experience this at some point or in some way, let me explain.
Like many here I have been in Taiwan for a while, read 8+ yrs. During this time many friends have come and gone, back in the day I worked in an office with at least 10 other expats (till it closed). Since that time I have worked with other various companies all of which do not employ other expats (locally). 2 friends from the original company had Taiwanese wives as well, so they were ‘lifers’ too. However over the last year they have sucumb to the pressure and headed back home, the last just recently. I work a full-time job, travel overseas about half my time, am married, with daughter so keep myself busy. In my younger days I used to get out to the bars an awful lot, (still do when i am overseas) but these days less so.
Now when talking about friends I guess I am talking ‘best friends’, you know those that you bother to call, or those you go around each others homes to chew the fat, or grab a beer, or you have (or start) a hobby that you do together, or the ones you feel comfortable enough to share your most intimate thoughts.
I am not talking about: family (I have a loving wife and a great daughter); aquaintances ie: people you know and talk to if you happen to bump into them in the bar or on the street (for years I keep bumping into the same guy in the HK airport, Wanchai and TPE Carnegies), but you don’t go out of your way to contact; best friends back home, they are not here so in this scenario they don’t count; family friends, the husband of your wives friends; colleagues, friendly with the local collegues, go out for a meal once in a while as well as I have a lot of guys from the US coming in town frequently; etc.
Anyway, I am just curious how do others deal with the constant churn of friends while staying here? does it bother you? as you get older does it get harder to meet/make a good friend? do you find being in a foreign country you have a much smaller group of friends than you did back home? do you find yourself being less friendly or open with people because in your mind you know they will not be around for the long-haul? I know… I know… go to a 'mosa HH or other events, I went to one HH about 1yr ago but of late I seem to always be out of town… (just got back last week Friday and leaving again Sunday )