How does a person solve conflict in Taiwan?

Arts & Sciences Culture & History
1

I’m working from my own personal experience, which has largely been based in Yunlin county. I’m having some culture shock, and one of the more confusing issues for me is how to solve conflict. This post addresses several topics and was kind of hard to sum up under one subject. I went with conflict resolution because that is ultimately where this is going.

  1. I work in a state elementary school and one thing I and several of my colleagues have observed is that we get a lot of work place surprises. It’s not uncommon to find out at the last minute that your class won’t meet, or that a class you were told earlier is meeting, or that half of your students are gone, or that your double block is a single today, or your single block is a double. Why does this happen? I taught in the States for 7 years and while this sort of thing did occasionally happen, it was really rare. I find it hard to believe that my supervisors didn’t know half the fifth grade class would be in another city at a singing competition until 20 minutes before my class. Is this common in Taiwan, or just a problem in Yunlin county?

  2. I politely asked our Taiwanese go-between (our director of academics and principal don’t speak English) to request that we be given notice a little earlier because it’s very hard for us to adjust our lesson plans dramatically in 20 minutes. His response was “This happens rarely.” Ok, firstly, no it’s happened at least once a month, which in my book is frequent given that I teach at that school 8 days a month. Secondly, why wouldn’t he just say, “Oh, sorry, ok.”? I know I didn’t directly cause him to lose face because this was filtered through a Taiwanese person who I’m confident was polite. If that level of conflict (please let us know when the plan is going to change pretty quickly after you know about it) is too hot to handle, I don’t quite know what to do.

  3. I’m generally confused by indirect speech here. Here’s why: we Americans actually have our own version; we don’t just blurt out whatever we’re thinking unfiltered (unless we’re socially maladroit). Taiwanese are actually incredibly blunt about a lot of things we aren’t back in the States (wow, how much do you weigh? How much do you make? How much is your rent?). Yet I have gotten very brusque reactions to “I’m confused, I thought xyz.” It seems that any statement, even if made politely, that requests some change of behavior or even obliquely implies that a Taiwanese person may have screwed up is met with intense denial/defensiveness and I generally feel like a jerk for bringing it up.

So how do Taiwanese people manage conflict? With me, I wish I had a dollar for every time I hear “cultural difference and miscommunication.” Ok, in my effort to avoid miscommunication, it would seem I’m being too direct, leading to causing offense where I do not wish to do so.

If anyone has any ideas about this, I’d be much obliged.

2

[quote=“rujew1066”]

  1. I work in a state elementary school and one thing I and several of my colleagues have observed is that we get a lot of work place surprises. It’s not uncommon to find out at the last minute that your class won’t meet, or that a class you were told earlier is meeting, or that half of your students are gone, or that your double block is a single today, or your single block is a double. Why does this happen? I taught in the States for 7 years and while this sort of thing did occasionally happen, it was really rare. I find it hard to believe that my supervisors didn’t know half the fifth grade class would be in another city at a singing competition until 20 minutes before my class. Is this common in Taiwan, or just a problem in Yunlin county?

  2. I politely asked our Taiwanese go-between (our director of academics and principal don’t speak English) to request that we be given notice a little earlier because it’s very hard for us to adjust our lesson plans dramatically in 20 minutes. His response was “This happens rarely.” Ok, firstly, no it’s happened at least once a month, which in my book is frequent given that I teach at that school 8 days a month. Secondly, why wouldn’t he just say, “Oh, sorry, ok.”? I know I didn’t directly cause him to lose face because this was filtered through a Taiwanese person who I’m confident was polite. If that level of conflict (please let us know when the plan is going to change pretty quickly after you know about it) is too hot to handle, I don’t quite know what to do.[/quote]

Annoying though it may be, just go with the flow on this stuff. Bashing your head against it won’t help, and might create other problems for you by making you appear “unreasonable” from the local perspective.

[quote]3) I’m generally confused by indirect speech here. Here’s why: we Americans actually have our own version; we don’t just blurt out whatever we’re thinking unfiltered (unless we’re socially maladroit). Taiwanese are actually incredibly blunt about a lot of things we aren’t back in the States (wow, how much do you weigh? How much do you make? How much is your rent?). Yet I have gotten very brusque reactions to “I’m confused, I thought xyz.” It seems that any statement, even if made politely, that requests some change of behavior or even obliquely implies that a Taiwanese person may have screwed up is met with intense denial/defensiveness and I generally feel like a jerk for bringing it up.

So how do Taiwanese people manage conflict? With me, I wish I had a dollar for every time I hear “cultural difference and miscommunication.” Ok, in my effort to avoid miscommunication, it would seem I’m being too direct, leading to causing offense where I do not wish to do so.

If anyone has any ideas about this, I’d be much obliged.[/quote]

Much tougher. If you don’t speak the language certainly not any easier, and maybe impossible. You may be better off not making such requests unless it is about something vitally important, or if you can get a sense of how to approach things indirectly. In fact this is largely how locals manage conflict, that is, by avoiding it. If it becomes an imperative it’s probably not going to be a smooth resolution. This is much more true for those down the ranks of a totem pole in an organization.

If this kind of stuff is too psychically wearing, it’s probably better in the long run to find a new place to hang your shingle.

3

People are stupid everywhere, but they’re stupid in different ways in different cultures.

I’ve noticed that when Taiwanese realize there’s a problem, they get right on it and fix the problem. I see this happen a lot because they don’t think far enough ahead to avoid problems in the first place. So things are constantly going wrong and then getting sorted out. You just have to get used to it. It’s never dull. And don’t personalize things. They are what they are, and you can work around it if you accept it as a given.

4

The reason this happens is that they don’t include foreigners as regular staff at schools, and English classes outside of official tests are lowest on the pecking order.

That’s just the way it is here, you can’t change it.

Also remember that many teachers in schools here are also contract workers, they get paid and treated like shit , worse than foreigners.

Lastly you are teaching in bloody Yunlin, don’t expect niceties in the poorest county in Taiwan.

So go with the flow or get a proper teaching job somewhere else.

Use the spare time for whatever purposes suits you,

5

Hah, I was conned into working in Huwei (Yunlin) after I worked for Shane for one year. My Taiwanese “friend” was opening an English school and wanted me to manage it…

Cut a long story short, I left after a really depressing 6 months. The most exciting places in Huwei were 7-11 and the DVD store.

6

[quote=“rowland”]People are stupid everywhere, but they’re stupid in different ways in different cultures.

I’ve noticed that when Taiwanese realize there’s a problem, they get right on it and fix the problem. I see this happen a lot because they don’t think far enough ahead to avoid problems in the first place. So things are constantly going wrong and then getting sorted out. You just have to get used to it. It’s never dull. And don’t personalize things. They are what they are, and you can work around it if you accept it as a given.[/quote]

:thumbsup:

I’m really beginning to feel that what Taiwan lacks most is vision in the sense of long-term planning. Everything else here runs fine (except sometimes the traffic).

7

There can be a lack of ‘joined up thinking’ here.

Not the only place to lack this of course.

‘Joined up thinking’ is an emphasis on analyzing a plan overall to see if it works in it’s entirety. So that would be building a high speed rail but no subway link to the station.

Constructing a footpath outside your luxury apartment complex but not on the next block.

Building a massive coal station near a major city and forgetting about the air pollution that it will cause.

People in Taipei basically abandoning the rest of the country to local corrupt networks and forgetting where their food comes from.

That kind of thing is rampant here. Sometimes it’s a result of corruption though, not lack of foresight.

8

Conflict resolution in Taiwan?
Learn to bend like a reed in the breeze. Be prepared for doublespeak, gossip, and obfuscation. Take it on the other cheek, bid one’s time, soldify one’s perimetre. Wait for the appropriate moment to bring up grievances. This moment shall appear out of the blue, and be totally unconnected with said grievances.
Bring them all out, but leave an avenue of egress. For all parties. Accentuate the positive, and how such can be fulfilled by minimzing the negative.

These are lessons learned the hard way, and by no means can one do it all the time. Yet often, strategy over tactics carries the day.

9

[quote=“rowland”]People are stupid everywhere, but they’re stupid in different ways in different cultures.

I’ve noticed that when Taiwanese realize there’s a problem, they get right on it and fix the problem. I see this happen a lot because they don’t think far enough ahead to avoid problems in the first place. So things are constantly going wrong and then getting sorted out. You just have to get used to it. It’s never dull. And don’t personalize things. They are what they are, and you can work around it if you accept it as a given.[/quote]

i am offended by your insensitivity towards us software engineers. :fume:

oh wait, you are talking about Taiwanese people… carry on then, although Taiwanese should all be software engineers :bravo:

10

[quote=“rujew1066”]I’m working from my own personal experience…

…If anyone has any ideas about this, I’d be much obliged.[/quote]
I don’t have any useful advice for you, I just wanted to thank you for posting and reminding me of a time when this kind of bullshit used to surprise me =) Oh yes, I remember that. It was a long time ago.

Recently my place of employment asked me to do something out of my ordinary duties in an office far far away. When I showed up (30 minutes late, either because I lost my way or I was trying to mitigate the lack of preparation that I knew awaited me, you be the judge) they, of course, were not ready for me and scrambled frantically around for an hour, looking flustered and vaguely annoyed at me for putting them through it, trying to figure out what to do with me. Then they gave me no directions at all and looked at me as if I were the one who was supposed to tell them what was going on. Uh huh. That makes sense, because I’ve done something like this exactly never none times and you were the ones who called me in to do it in the first place.

So I took the lead (because the lead needed to be taken, and it wasn’t going to take itself, and none of these other people seemed the least bit inclined to do anything resembling lead-taking) and we got things done in exactly the haphazard manner that one might expect when someone who’s never done something like this and never had any training pertaining to it takes the lead. They seemed so happy that I was willing to take the lead that they invited me back again to do the same thing, and at that time there was another unsuspecting foreigner there (of course nobody told me that would happen) who turned to me and said, “They told me you were a pro and would explain everything to me!”
Ah. Of course they did.
So we were off to the races once again, our horses drunkenly stumbling around the arena while the lightbulbs flashed and the crowd yelled encouraging words and only occasionally threw beer bottles.
And I know that if some higher up catches wind that the results weren’t 100% professional, they will simply blame it on the stupid foreigner who took the reigns. And I know that no one will ever tell me this, and I will only indirectly get a sense that people are looking at me sideways for some reason, but none of this surprises me or even troubles me very much. But your post reminds me of a time, oh so long ago, when it did surprise me, and thank you for that, because it made me laugh.

The surprise fades with time, but the surreal feeling of living here never does. If you last, you’ll likely find yourself scratching your head 5 years from now wondering, “did that really just happen? Did I really just do that?” and let me assure you, it did, and you did. Let the merriment continue forever.

11

[quote=“NonTocareLeTete”][quote=“rujew1066”]I’m working from my own personal experience…

…If anyone has any ideas about this, I’d be much obliged.[/quote]
I don’t have any useful advice for you, I just wanted to thank you for posting and reminding me of a time when this kind of bullshit used to surprise me =) Oh yes, I remember that. It was a long time ago.

Recently my place of employment asked me to do something out of my ordinary duties in an office far far away. When I showed up (30 minutes late, either because I lost my way or I was trying to mitigate the lack of preparation that I knew awaited me, you be the judge) they, of course, were not ready for me and scrambled frantically around for an hour, looking flustered and vaguely annoyed at me for putting them through it, trying to figure out what to do with me. Then they gave me no directions at all and looked at me as if I were the one who was supposed to tell them what was going on. Uh huh. That makes sense, because I’ve done something like this exactly never none times and you were the ones who called me in to do it in the first place.

So I took the lead (because the lead needed to be taken, and it wasn’t going to take itself, and none of these other people seemed the least bit inclined to do anything resembling lead-taking) and we got things done in exactly the haphazard manner that one might expect when someone who’s never done something like this and never had any training pertaining to it takes the lead. They seemed so happy that I was willing to take the lead that they invited me back again to do the same thing, and at that time there was another unsuspecting foreigner there (of course nobody told me that would happen) who turned to me and said, “They told me you were a pro and would explain everything to me!”
Ah. Of course they did.
So we were off to the races once again, our horses drunkenly stumbling around the arena while the lightbulbs flashed and the crowd yelled encouraging words and only occasionally threw beer bottles.
And I know that if some higher up catches wind that the results weren’t 100% professional, they will simply blame it on the stupid foreigner who took the reigns. And I know that no one will ever tell me this, and I will only indirectly get a sense that people are looking at me sideways for some reason, but none of this surprises me or even troubles me very much. But your post reminds me of a time, oh so long ago, when it did surprise me, and thank you for that, because it made me laugh.

The surprise fades with time, but the surreal feeling of living here never does. If you last, you’ll likely find yourself scratching your head 5 years from now wondering, “did that really just happen? Did I really just do that?” and let me assure you, it did, and you did. Let the merriment continue forever.[/quote]

There, it is.
:bow:

12

Chinese/Taiwanese don’t have long term planning because from the moment they’re born, decisions are made for them.

How do you criticize a Chinese/Taiwanese? First, you build concensus on that unwelcome behavior amongst everyone else around them.

13

i think what Dirt said hit the nail on the head there…

this kind of thing used to really piss me off back in the day. it was their risk though to treat me that was because i was not nice to deal with afterwards. the worst thing was when i had already left work- yea thats right, i left on time! i skipped the unpaid overtime like …any sane person would. anyway so i was out at the movies, about the walk in to the theatre and i got a call to move all my stuff from the office right now because they were changing offices… wankers.

OP, if i were you i would kick up a fuss about it. give them some short term notice revenge or something… not the best idea but hey if i was working for locals still i would need to do something to keep my sanity.

14

You just have to try to explain things ending with a question …so they can believe they made the decision . Conversation with my boss…

Boss: “What happens if we invest in training our employees and then they leave us?”
Me : “What happens if we don’t and they stay?”

15

In Taiwan conflict isn’t recognized, misunderstandings is the preferred term.

Until they start swinging a bat at you.

16

Hah, I was conned into working in Huwei (Yunlin) after I worked for Shane for one year. My Taiwanese “friend” was opening an English school and wanted me to manage it…

Cut a long story short, I left after a really depressing 6 months. The most exciting places in Huwei were 7-11 and the DVD store.[/quote]

There are some awesome beer towers there though :wink:

17

[quote=“shiadoa”]You just have to try to explain things ending with a question …so they can believe they made the decision . Conversation with my boss…

Boss: “What happens if we invest in training our employees and then they leave us?”
Me : “What happens if we don’t and they stay?”[/quote]

Please make this your sig. It deserves to be promulgated forever.

Both in the national interest, and for the benefit of humanity.

18

[quote=“Charlie Phillips”][quote=“shiadoa”]You just have to try to explain things ending with a question …so they can believe they made the decision . Conversation with my boss…

Boss: “What happens if we invest in training our employees and then they leave us?”
Me : “What happens if we don’t and they stay?”[/quote]

Please make this your sig. It deserves to be promulgated forever.

Both in the national interest, and for the benefit of humanity.[/quote]
Seconded!