Why would you want it?
[quote=“SNL”]Clint Eastwood: Well… it’s about a fella with a… neatly-trimmed beard. A fella, not unlike yourself. Well, this fella… he liked pokin’ his nose where it didn’t rightly belong. Well, that fella woke up one morning and he noticed that his face was a little sore. That’s because while he was sleepin’, why someone had kicked most of his teeth in. Now, what do you make o’ that story?
James Lipton: [ laughs ] Delightful! [ grabs his next card ] Every once in a while, an actor creates a role that touches us in such a way, God himself says, “Bravo!” That role, for me, was that of Hogan in “Two Mules for Sister Sara”. In my opinion, one of the greatest roles ever to be captured on film.
Clint Eastwood: Well, that’s a hell of an opinion, and I’ve got an opinion of my own. You really like the sound o’ your own voice, don’t ya?
James Lipton: A reference to me. And now it’s time for the dreaded questions. [ giggles ] Let’s start with: What is your least favorite word?
Clint Eastwood: Neatly-trimmed beard.
James Lipton: What’s your favorite curse word?
Clint Eastwood: Well that’d have to be you.
James Lipton: And, finally, if heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive?
Clint Eastwood: Well, I’d like to hear him say, as he doffed his cap to me, “Well, Clint, James Lipton is in Hell right now, being raped by the Devil.” I believe that would hit my ear just fine.
James Lipton: Clint Eastwood, on behalf of the Actor’s Studio, and the students before us, I thank you. Any final words?
Clint Eastwood: Well, Sir… I have met some goddamned dirty sons of bitches in my time, and I have met some dirty goddamned sons of bitches. But, you Sir, are, without a doubt, the goddamnedest dirtiest son of a bitch I have ever met.
James Lipton: Eloquently put! Ladies and gentlemen, Clint Eastwood.
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