I am Getting Confused with "I and My plus Person" vs "Me and My plus Person" vs My plus Person and I

I always teach my students that “me” is used for objects only, while “I” is used for the subjects.

My friends and I went shopping.
I and my friends went shopping is grammatically correct but falls short on courtesy.

However, especially reading on this forum, I very often come across something like; Me, and my friends did this/that.

A: Is this grammatically correct.
B: Has this become acceptable in terms of politeness?
C: Or, is it even required as a statement for self-confidence, something like that?

A: No.
B: I don’t think so. I think it just rolls off the tongue better than “I and.” It’s reasonably common. Maybe it’ll be an accepted deviation some day, like “aren’t I?”

A. If native speakers say it and native listeners understand it, then it is ‘correct’.
B. It’s informal and sounds slightly peasantish but it’s not impolite.
C. No.

‘I and xxxx’ is almost never used, I suspect partly because if you have a vowel followed by a schwa-y ‘and’, it doesn’t get heard as clearly and so gradually became ‘unacceptable’.

[quote=“Hamletintaiwan”]I always teach my students that “me” is used for objects only, while “I” is used for the subjects.

I and my friends went shopping is grammatically correct but falls short on courtesy. [/quote]

Nothing to do with “courtesy”. Me and my friends …" is bad enough, but “I and my friends …”??? Rubbish. Reads like a Hemingway novel.

[quote=“Hamletintaiwan”]However, especially reading on this forum, I very often come across something like; Me, and my friends did this/that.
[/quote]

Well, you used the semicolon and comma incorrectly. As for “Me and my friends did …”, that’s mere Facebook and 13-year-old text nonsense. You should have written a “lol” after it to give it more substance.

It’s “My friends and I …”.

[quote=“Ermintrude”]A. If native speakers say it and native listeners understand it, then it is ‘correct’.
B. It’s informal and sounds slightly peasantish but it’s not impolite.
C. No.
[/quote]
As a country bumpkin myself, i wouldn’t go with the “peasantish” :wink: , but it’s definitely colloquial and informal (which is not the same as “wrong”)…

In addition, putting oneself (“I”) at the beginning of a phrase mentioning other people, as well, was (is?) considered impolite in certain circles (not sure whether it is related to a country/city distinction or an age distinction or differently perceived and used depending on the region). At least, as the OP must have noticed by now, native speakers have differing views on this question.

And, here are a few, extra commas, in case, they are needed (take them and put them, where you like)… :whistle:

[quote=“Hamletintaiwan”]I always teach my students that “me” is used for objects only, while “I” is used for the subjects.

My friends and I went shopping.
I and my friends went shopping is grammatically correct but falls short on courtesy.[/quote]
“I and my friends…” is grammatically correct, but idiomatically wrong. It has nothing to do with courtesy; it’s just convention. It sounds strange to most native speakers.

[quote]However, especially reading on this forum, I very often come across something like; Me, and my friends did this/that.

A: Is this grammatically correct.[/quote]
No. Sadly it’s somewhat common, but it’s grammatically incorrect.

Nothing to do with politeness. Saying “Me and my friends” as the subject of a sentence is considered a bad grammatical habit. It’s something that children often say, and as such makes the user seem immature and/or uneducated and/or hickish.

No. It’s best avoided, even in informal circumstances.

Likewise, don’t use “my friends and I” as the object of a sentence (e.g. “He warned my friends and I not to go there”). I find this even worse, since it’s a form of pretentious hypercorrection.

Interesting to see how different (and contradictory) the answers are, depending on whether the person answering is a “descriptionists” or a prescriptionists"…

The OP may feel relieved to see the evidence here that suggests the question cannot be answered in a conclusive way. :slight_smile:

Ain’t playing with language fun!

I wouldnt really say the answers are all that contradictory. The general consensus is that it is incorrect. One person thinks that since native speakers use it, it is OK, but informal and peasantish. However, I have read one English-teaching textbook (written by a native speaker of English from England) where the form me and my ----`was actually taught. The authors did point out that it was informal (thank God).

Well, i take it you are a “prescriptionist”. :laughing:
“Descriptionists” (myself included) will disagree with you here: there is neither a consensus, nor is the usage “incorrect”. :slight_smile:

Simply put, “incorrect” is not the appropriate choice whenever there is an established linguistic community within the larger community of English speakers where a given phrasing or usage is common - what we may (and i think, ought to) say is that it is “non-standard”, or one could explain it as “limited to a minority/regional/age-specific/[etc., as the case may be] community”. At least, if we don’t know whether a given usage exists or not, we should be more careful with what we tell our students - it is not useful to make claims from ignorance (and we all are to a certain extent ignorant, in the sense that we cannot possibly know all the linguistic communities of English speakers and their usage habits).

Another example: if someone were to ask here whether the expression “I amn’t” is correct English, i am sure many here would say that it is incorrect. But however many may take that position, there exists a linguistic community where “I amn’t” is used habitually, so this expression, too, can honestly only be labeled “non-standard” but not “incorrect”.

A few years ago, in an evening class for advanced learners of English, someone asked, “‘How is it going?’ or ‘How goes it?’, which one is correct?”
I asked the members of the class what they thought. The answers were interesting: one person suggested, “The second question is wrong.”, one quickly replied, “Well, I can understand both, so they both seem right to me”, and a third one tentatively added, “Maybe ‘How goes it?’ is a kind of slang?”. Another member of the group then suggested, “I would never say ‘How goes it’, but i understand it.” I then explained again (since it was not the first time i had to do this) that “right” or “wrong” is often not the appropriate terminology when it comes to language (unfortunately Japanese are typically brought up on a steady diet of “right” and “wrong”, so this question will haunt them forever), and that with “How goes it”, we had a perfect example of “non-standard” language use.

And then, as now, my follow-up suggestion: use the search engine of your choice to see how colourful/diverse/ :sunglasses: the world really is…
wordwatchtowers.wordpress.com/2 … y-friends/
english.stackexchange.com/questi … my-friends
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Me_and_My_Friends

urbandictionary.com/define.p … ow+goes+it

:2cents:

Me don’t have any friends, so . . .

Right. Me neither…