I have not showered this entire year

Have not had a shower since 2019.

Can’t wait.

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Since last decade!

Have also not flossed.

write back how it feels having lasted til 2021

Well, the next decade only starts on year 2021, no?

Technically yes, but most people I don’t think would know that and bringing that up in a party is likely to get you funny looks.

People like round numbers.

I prefer “curvy.”

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Big boned.

Whoa, calm down sailor!