I Wish

Work Teaching English in Taiwan
1

Here are some things I wish for when I start a new job:

  1. I wish they would pay all the teachers the same pay, and not forbid you to share how much you make with your co-workers.

  2. I wish one time I could work at a school that didn’t have that one kid with a mental disorder.

  3. I wish I could get paid at the end of the month instead of some crazy random day that usually falls on a weekend.

  4. I wish that when they claim to provide the materials for the class, that they don’t mean they have one book and you have to spend 20 minutes before class to photocopying it.

  5. I wish the boss wasn’t on a power trip and let me do my thing. “Yes boss, I know you have been teaching for 50,000 years. Your way must be right, even though you can’t speak the language I am teaching.”

  6. I wish that the child of the boss will never be in one of my classes again. If you have ever had a friend that was a child of a preacher/cop, then you will understand what I mean. Same thing.

  7. I wish that I didn’t have to write a 1 page report on each child every freaking day, especially when a couple of them don’t participate in the class and I have to make up things to write down.

  8. I wish that when a letter/note is sent home to the problem child’s house that their parents take some responsibility and whoop that ass into line.

  9. I wish there was a law (like in the US) that forced companies to pay you every 2 weeks. I hate monthly payments.

and finally…

  1. I wish that I could teach from home (in bed if possible), like over the internet or something. Skype + Webcam = Awesomeness!

Perhaps all of these are pipedreams, but a man can wish. :unamused:

What are your wishes?

2

You’ve pretty much covered them all, but I wish that all schools supported having children who are behind repeat the level rather than being pushed ahead into material that they will never be able to master without having properly learnt the basics.

Oh, and a proper pension plan, too.

3

Here are some things I wish for when I start a new job:

  1. I wish they would pay all the teachers the same pay, and not forbid you to share how much you make with your co-workers.

Why? This is standard practice in most companies worldwide. I don’t want to earn the same as a new teacher, and I don’t want anyone to know what I earn unless I tell them.

  1. I wish one time I could work at a school that didn’t have that one kid with a mental disorder.
    Thats a bit of a sad thing that you wrote there. Special needs kids are still kids.

  2. I wish I could get paid at the end of the month instead of some crazy random day that usually falls on a weekend.

Thats life.

  1. I wish that when they claim to provide the materials for the class, that they don’t mean they have one book and you have to spend 20 minutes before class to photocopying it.

A good teacher will always want to prepare their own lessons.

  1. I wish the boss wasn’t on a power trip and let me do my thing. “Yes boss, I know you have been teaching for 50,000 years. Your way must be right, even though you can’t speak the language I am teaching.”

If your boss has more experience than you then listen to them. I’d hate to try and cross the headteacher of a school here.

  1. I wish that the child of the boss will never be in one of my classes again. If you have ever had a friend that was a child of a preacher/cop, then you will understand what I mean. Same thing.

I don’t see the problem here.
7. I wish that I didn’t have to write a 1 page report on each child every freaking day, especially when a couple of them don’t participate in the class and I have to make up things to write down.

Cut and paste on word, then glue in your daily reports. Piece of piss.

  1. I wish that when a letter/note is sent home to the problem child’s house that their parents take some responsibility and whoop that ass into line.

Get the letter written in Chinese. Leave space for a parents comment and expect the letter returned with a descritpion of the action taken at home.

  1. I wish there was a law (like in the US) that forced companies to pay you every 2 weeks. I hate monthly payments.

Tough bananas.

and finally…

  1. I wish that I could teach from home (in bed if possible), like over the internet or something. Skype + Webcam = Awesomeness!

    Maybe with a whore to suck you off?

Perhaps all of these are pipedreams, but a man can wish. :unamused:

What are your wishes?

I wish for teachers to work harder and have more realistic expectations. Thats why I put all my dreams into a pipe.

4

Geez, thanks for ripping apart my fantasy. It’s fine you don’t agree with me, but it’s now I feel. Can’t a guy vent in peace anymore?

5

I wish my boss didn’t give me a revised summer schedule today that means for the next 6 weeks I start teaching just before lunch and finish at 8.00pm without a proper break in between any classes (although I do get 10 mins around 4.20pm that should give me enough time to run 200m down the road to Starbucks and get a couple of espressos to keep me going seeing as I won’t have time to eat lunch).

6

Just one: Work less, make more.

Can you dig it?

7

Nice wishes, Frost, except the part about getting paid the same as everyone else. That is, unless everyone was making like $2500/hour or something. :smiley:

Me? I wish:

  1. I could group kids by both cognitive and linguistic ability level. Not just approximately, but truly with groups of peers.

  2. I could put an automatic electric shock collar on a few kids that would zap them every time their minds wander off.
    (And don’t say it’s my teaching, cause you give these kids a worksheet to fill out, an example of how to do it, and they write a few words and then start playing with their eraser if you don’t call their name every 3 seconds).

  3. I could monitor some kids English class at their public schools and give teacher training to those that need it.

But generally, I like my present school. Just wish I could make more money at it.

8

What a nice thing to say.

9

[quote=“TomHill”]4. I wish that when they claim to provide the materials for the class, that they don’t mean they have one book and you have to spend 20 minutes before class to photocopying it.

A good teacher will always want to prepare their own lessons.

  1. I wish the boss wasn’t on a power trip and let me do my thing. “Yes boss, I know you have been teaching for 50,000 years. Your way must be right, even though you can’t speak the language I am teaching.”

If your boss has more experience than you then listen to them. I’d hate to try and cross the head teacher of a school here. [/quote]

Seems to me like the sniping here is contradictory. A good teacher should prepare their lessons yet can’t, and should listen to a boss who doesn’t know how to speak the language. I’m confused.

10

This makes no sense. You conceed that it is fine for me to disagree with you, yet mention your right to be left alone. How else can one disagree on a public forum other than writing what the dis-agreement is?

11

[quote=“TomHill”]2. I wish one time I could work at a school that didn’t have that one kid with a mental disorder.
Thats a bit of a sad thing that you wrote there. Special needs kids are still kids. [/quote]

I’m completely with Frost on that one. Special needs kids are kids with special needs that are almost never being met by a buxiban. That one messed-up kid often needs one-on-one time with a specialist and/or medication, not faxie times two.

12

I wish that for all of the educational theories and psychology that my boss has read and studied, he would consider applying even just one of them to the curriculum.

That instead of using the same old crappy, badly-written materials for the lower level, which I have repeatedly told them is horrible and that students from my former school who are dying to escape will never go to them because of the materials they use, they would adopt much better materials.

That they would allow teachers to work collaboratively instead of saying, “Gosh, Imani, that’s a good idea!” and then never follow up on it.

That they would stop hiring teachers who are not interested in doing a good job - who have their job for 4 months because it takes them 3 months to find a replacement after hearing the parents’, students’, co-workers’, and branch managers’ complaints after the first month.

That after letting their staff go off to fucking awesome professional development workshops, they’d actually ask for us to share what we learned with others rather than saying, “Well, it sounds like you had a nice time. I’ll let you tell me about it some other time.”

That they’d put a deadline on registration so they weren’t twiddling their thumbs and canceling classes at the last minute (and I do mean last minute) after promising their teachers 15 hours of work from said class.
A slightly dramatized conversation based on all-too-real events…
“About how many students can I expect for class today?”
“Well, we don’t know. Most of them haven’t paid yet, but their parents are still thinking about it.”
“But class started two days ago and they’ve been coming every day.”
“Photocopy the books for those who haven’t paid and make them ‘love you’ so they will want to join the class. Oh, and ask the students in your class to join this extra class on their day off so we can get open it up.”
“All four books for 15 kids who may or may not be coming back? Whose money is paying for all of these photocopies since it’s apparently not coming from their parents’ pockets?”

I assert that my job is to teach, not to entertain, impress, or advertise. I often wonder why I still have a job with a mouth like mine. It frustrates me because they have the best intentions and the potential to become one of the best schools in the city, but have an extremely buxiban way of doing things.

13

Hmm… I wish

Kids with special needs had the seeming luxury of actually having their parents communicate to the school and teacher about what exactly those needs are so I could address the problems properly. I’m not a doctor but I would certainly listen to valid opinions from one.

Schools would be better about keeping the school clean, especially when they have had complaints about allergies and even sick days because of this. Dust in the air system is bad, folks. Get it on a schedule and pay for it.

Schools would get serious about having kids properly wash their hands and DRY them before coming back to class. Provide the means to do this, either through towel service or paper towels.

Parents would put some effort into their child’s education, including helping them review, providing a little English environment at home, making sure the homework is done, looking at the communication books, etc. Don’t come to me and tell me Johnny doesn’t want to speak English. He’s your kid.

Schools would either provide books, materials and some kind of course schedule in a timely fashion like they say they will or else pay me extra to do it. I have to prepare the lessons anyway, but you have to either tell me what you want in what time or let me hash it out.

Schools would wake up and respond to changing markets appropriately rather than just pushing things through the same way they have always done it just because thats the way they have always done it. If I like your school I’m willing to train and learn new things just to keep working there rather than watch you lose students to schools that are offering different things.

Schools would get serious and expect reasonable results in a reasonable period of time rather than hoping the students are having “fun” and more are signing up. Stop giving them certificates of excellence and passing them on to the next level when they haven’t done anything but doodle and play with their mechanical pencils for…ever.

Schools will get rid of bad teachers in a timely fashion rather than keep somebody on because he has a nice face and he seems to come in on time. Stop hiring people who can’t demonstrate a decent knowledge of basic grammar in their freaking resumes.

14

If a teacher can’t spell the month when writing the date or the title of the book (which appears on the book, the teacher’s guide cover, and the syllabus for crying out loud)that is being used in class correctly, then maybe they aren’t qualified to be teaching English…

One would think my employers would consider this line of thought…

15

I got one more. I wish my immune system was ultra powerful and could fight off all the germs these kids have. When I teach I am always sick!

16

It’s called “having an anal retentive handwashing policy”. I make my kids first touch my hand (to see if it’s even wet) then to let me smell them. Usually they balk at the step that they neglect and turn to go wash them again without me telling them to. If they sneeze, they wash their hands. If they blow their noses, they wash their hands. If their finger goes anywhere that looks like inside a nostril, they wash their hands. Anything that goes in noses or mouths gets washed with soap and water. And I wash my hands during their breaks and after class. Even when I am lax about washing between classes, I am still retentive about their hand washing. And I keep wet wipes around for myself. I have them scrub the tables with soap and water once a week - aka “the Cinderella bucket” after my fairy tales summer class in 2005 named it that. I am almost tempted to get those Lysol wipes to get the doorknobs, table tops, and art supplies, but haven’t felt a need to go that far.

The longest “cold” I’ve had in 3+ years has not lasted more than 72 hours.

17

[quote=“twocs”][quote=“TomHill”]4. I wish that when they claim to provide the materials for the class, that they don’t mean they have one book and you have to spend 20 minutes before class to photocopying it.

A good teacher will always want to prepare their own lessons.

  1. I wish the boss wasn’t on a power trip and let me do my thing. “Yes boss, I know you have been teaching for 50,000 years. Your way must be right, even though you can’t speak the language I am teaching.”

If your boss has more experience than you then listen to them. I’d hate to try and cross the head teacher of a school here. [/quote]

Seems to me like the sniping here is contradictory. A good teacher should prepare their lessons yet can’t, and should listen to a boss who doesn’t know how to speak the language. I’m confused.[/quote]

Wait. Why isn’t Frost able to prepare his lessons? He can photocopy his resources any time he likes, right? What does it matter if the boss speaks English or not? If he is providing Frost with techniques for how to teach, it is not important if he speaks English. They are clearly able to communicate, either through an intermediary or possibly Frost speaks Chinese. So why shouldn’t he listen to someone with more classroom experience than him, regardless of their nationality?

18

[quote=“alidarbac”][quote=“TomHill”]2. I wish one time I could work at a school that didn’t have that one kid with a mental disorder.
Thats a bit of a sad thing that you wrote there. Special needs kids are still kids. [/quote]

I’m completely with Frost on that one. Special needs kids are kids with special needs that are almost never being met by a buxiban. That one messed-up kid often needs one-on-one time with a specialist and/or medication, not faxie times two.[/quote]

We have two terms here: Special needs, and mental disorder.

Alidarbac, many special needs children can be included in any classroom. In some cases the teacher should be trained or prepared for the inclusion of the child, but in general, inclusion should be the way to go.

‘Mental disorder,’ sounds like discrimination. I have an issue with discrimination. The op is likely to be talking about a child with challenging behaviour.

Now bask in my lovely English usage.

19

[quote=“TomHill”][quote=“alidarbac”][quote=“TomHill”]2. I wish one time I could work at a school that didn’t have that one kid with a mental disorder.
Thats a bit of a sad thing that you wrote there. Special needs kids are still kids. [/quote]

I’m completely with Frost on that one. Special needs kids are kids with special needs that are almost never being met by a buxiban. That one messed-up kid often needs one-on-one time with a specialist and/or medication, not faxie times two.[/quote]

We have two terms here: Special needs, and mental disorder.

Alidarbac, many special needs children can be included in any classroom. In some cases the teacher should be trained or prepared for the inclusion of the child, but in general, inclusion should be the way to go.

‘Mental disorder,’ sounds like discrimination. I have an issue with discrimination. The op is likely to be talking about a child with challenging behaviour.

Now bask in my lovely English usage.[/quote]

If this were an environment where teachers were trained, then yes, I could see your beef. The thing is, though, the only qualification for a teaching job in Taiwan is a degree and passport from the right country. I can’t imagine the average teacher here is trained to handle autistic children, ADHD children, or children with other learning disabilities - however, these kids are often dumped - and yes, I do mean “dumped” as in to give mom and dad and/or grandma and grandpa a 90-minute to 3-hour reprieve from caring for the child themselves. A child who is having difficulties mastering concepts in their own native language probably shouldn’t be subjected from having to master those same concepts in a foreign language with a teacher who is not able to give them the attention that they need, let alone the support that they need. I’ve had kids who had speaking difficulties in Chinese whose parents had dumped them into an English program, knowing their kids couldn’t even speak their mother tongue without problems. In a public school they have no choice to turn such a child away because every child has the right to be educated, or at least it’s that way in the US. Then again, teachers have a better understanding of children with special needs than your average buxiban teacher.

However, as is abundantly clear, buxiban is not a right but a privilege. I guess people will take other people’s money, even if the child was completely incapable of controlling their bodily functions, since the person who says yes to a needy student is not going to be the one who has to deal with their issues while still trying to teach the other dozen or so kids also in the class.

I wish school owners weren’t as worried about the bottom line and cared more about what was being learned.

I wish that schools reflected research-based methods of teaching rather than methods which have been proven to be damaging and ineffective through a plethora of studies.

20

When did this law come about? I worked in a law office in New York for three years and all the permanent staff got paid once a month.

As for the other complaints, really, Taiwan isn’t much different than some school systems in the U.S. in terms of stupid policies, bosses that tell you about teaching when they’ve never actually taught, but just majored in educational management, and special needs kids improperly integrated into a classroom where the teacher has not been sufficiently trained to help them.

And if you want to teach from home, do it. There are companies that exist for that sort of thing.