I’m a 'Murkan here in Taiwan with a Taiwanese wife. Anything I need to know that you wish you knew earlier once the kid is born (or even before)?
Eg, how do you choose a bilingual school and how early do I need to plan? At home, do you speak both Chinese and English? If I don’t improve MY Chinese, will I be “that one weird foreigner” (I can get by, but I’m not great)?
One parent, one language. So you only speak English to the child. Would just skip any bilingual school (most are in any case iffy at best in BOTH languages). If you do your job talking to the kid, he/she will get more out of a regular Mandarin school.
And, congrats on doing your bit in improving the atrocious TW birthrate!
Have a long talk now about the pieces of your culture that she rejects.
No, she will not have discussed these directly, but she sure as shucks rejects something.
Get clear expectations established, and acknowledged; go get counseling now so you can be on the same page once baby is here.
Talk talk talk.
Of course this is me talking the worst, and hoping for the best
We mixed English & Chinese in Taiwan; English, Dutch and Chinese in the Netherlands. The eldest two spend the most time in Taiwan (primary school, living with grandparents) and speak/read/write all three fluent. The youngest moved when she was three and her Chinese is rubbish 
But she can understand lots.
Don’t drink too heavily. There’s nothing worse in the world then taking care of a colicky infant with a throbbing hangover.
I’ve got a friend who speaks perfect Chinese. His daughter won’t speak the father’s native language of xxx because father speaks perfect Chinese. I don’t speak Chinese so my daughter speaks perfect English. Her mother is Taiwanese so our daughter speaks perfect Chinese.
Really check out and learn about the schools. I’ve seen some really shameful things in regards to private bi-lingual schools and after school programs. So terrible.
Best to have at least one parent stay home and care for the child until age 4 or 5 and attend the child after school until age 6 or 7. That was very rewarding for my daughter and myself.
Oh, and congratulations. This was the best thing I’ve ever done in my life. My daughter is so amazing. I can’t explain how much joy my daughter has brought to my life. Here she is playing piano
Homeschool.
Yeah. Don’t do private “bilingual” schools for sure. Public maybe ok, since you’d be paying whatever minuscule school fees anyway, but VERY few begin to have any idea what “bilingual” means. I interviewed at a “dual-immersion” school and realized as I asked some follow up questions that I was the only person in the room that even knew what dual-immersion means. A private school charging 400k/semester that thinks having an Asian and a white person in each classroom makes it dual-immersion. Run. The heck. Away.
If you want to go to a private school, ask how many foreign teachers they have had since they started, then ask how many of their white teachers are even native English speakers. (To be clear, I have nothing against non-native English speakers teaching English. It’s when you hire a Russian who learned English starting four years ago and in Taiwan while you have ABCs being turned down that I have an issue with)
But one parent, one language, firmly and 100% hold yourself to it. I can’t tell you how many students’ parents tell me their child doesn’t know any English because they give them a funny look when they (the parents) speak English to the child. Yeah, you’ve spoken Chinese to him for seven years and now there’s English coming out of your mouth. What did you expect? But you need to be firm also that your kid speaks only English to you too. Even if you understand, you must teach them that English is the only language you will accept and mom must be firm that Chinese is the only language she will accept
If you go any non-homeschool route then the government, administrators and hysterical public will dominate your family. We’ve already seen lakes of tears spilled in other threads over the mountains of mindless busy work local schools inflict on children. But let’s ignore that and assume the quality was excellent and built well-rounded human beings. Now in the post-Covid era the school-as-daycare system is totally wrecked.
Government and public hysteria now has given the green light to close schools indefinitely. Many countries had schools closed for months. Like zoom? For a child 8 hours a day for months on end? In HK schools were closed for months and then when re-opened only on a half-day schedule for 1.5 years! Think of the colossal disruption to families to have Jr sitting at home on zoom all day for months and then when schools “reopens” he comes back before lunch everyday(!!) because the bureaucrats think children taking their paper masks off to eat is too dangerous so every school must end before lunch for almost two years straight?? Even with the half-day system HK still regularly closed individual schools when they had “respiratory infections” - yes truly just the common cold now, no jokes about Covid involved. The bureaucrats regularly close(d) HK schools because the cold was going around and they were afraid maybe Covid had slipped past their 21-day quarantine dragnet, never manifested itself anywhere else in the city except in random public elementary schools which are notorious for being havens for the cold.
If you gotta be home by noon to babysit Jr everyday, or if you gotta be able to leave work for weeks or months on end because some bureaucrat closed Jr’s school, you might as well just homeschool and forget the insanity.
Forced experimental shots are coming for the children as well. The West and China are all gunning for it. And when in class it’ll be plastic paper masks from here till the sun implodes. Any time anything, not just a Covid variant but now seasonal flus, or whatever comes about, this new: close all schools, do zoom for months, then masks for years + take whatever experimental drugs we just cooked up and rushed out the door will be the new go-to procedure the bureaucrats jump to. There is nothing so permanent as a temporary government measure - these bureaucrats wont release this new exteme power, especially since the media and the people cheer them on in fear.
Or you can bypass it all and just homeschool anyways. Reclaim autonomy over your family’s mind, schedule and soon, body.
Speak only to your child in your native language. Ask them to speak your language, whenever they speak Chinese. Be strict. Hold to this. Do not speak Chinese! Speak English to your wife. Act upset when your child addresses you in Chinese. I know that sounds rough, but it is not. Just expect them to speak your native language. Children are flexible and they will learn and adjust.
If you can, request that your wife not speak Chinese on certain days or certain hours. Those times are only for your native language. If your wife needs to speak to your child at those times, she should also speak your native language.
It may take 6-12 months longer (from when your child starts speaking Chinese), before they start talking to you somewhat fluently in your native language, but they will. And then it will be their second native language. They will thank you later.
It is fine to send kids to a good local kindergarten from a very young age. My kids went from age 2 (youngest) and they did great. No need to go anywhere bilingual, your child will pick up English on their own later, having a headstart speaking two languages already. My kids are good at English, even though it is not one of their two native languages, and they never went to any buxiban for English. It may be because I only ever spoke English to their mom.
Some advice, about actual child birth in Taiwan:
Some other advice, after 2-3 months, make your child sleep in another room. Do not let your child sleep in your bed. Make your child go to sleep early.
Good luck!
I’ve got 2 kids in the public school system. I speak English with them at home, wife speaks Taiwanese and Chinese with them. The middle school kid has good reading and speaking capabilities in English. First grader is doing fine and still learning.
Read books with your kid, talk with your kid. That should be enough for speaking. You will need to work harder for reading though. But start young and it’s easier.
Congrats.
I speak English with my kids and so does my wife on occasion. Thats not enough though, you have to read books with them everyday , watch movies and TV shows etc for them to pick up a decent level. Even then my kids English isn’t amazing (it’s pretty darn great for Taiwanese kids ) but then again their Chinese is at an awesome level so it’s all good .
As for the public schools , some schools and districts have more foreign parents than others, but usually there are few others to relate to . One of the drawbacks could be not having more of a support network from foreign national parents. And if you can’t read Chinese you will very quickly be outside if the club as they communicate by LINE groups and homework books daily. I can read Chinese and it’s still not great.
I also have some frustration with the lack of proper physical exercise in normal school times but that can be compensated by insisting they do after schools activities somewhat.
Kids don’t start spending a lot of time in public school and in their homework until about fourth grade or so.
A further caveat…I don’t think that Taiwan is the most kid friendly environment. Nowadays there are way more dogs around than kids. Some cities such as Taipei have been removing children’s playgrounds from their parks (if one pays attention ). And Taiwanese neighbours aren’t so friendly to kids. There’s a lot of grumpy old people who should have have more patience.
Again this can be compensated for somewhat as there are kids playgrounds to be found and lots of private club activities. Outside of Taipei is a better place for kids… such as Taichung or somewhere with more space, bigger kindergartens etc etc. Just my two cents.
1000 books by kindergarten. That’s 3 bed time stories every night. Just make sure they are not too long. This will encourage their English comprehension, plus it was part of a literacy campaign back in NY. Two birds with one book.
Super congrats!!!
Congratulations. Not sure how far along you guys are but if you just found out then you need to decide very early if your wife wants to go to one of the afterbirth care centers. They will book up very fast, especially the nice ones.
I’m with the others, I only speak English to my son and the wife speaks Chinese. Not sure how well it’s working as my son is still too young to speak.
If you choose to go to a public school, you’ll need to look into how the wait list system works. I’m not sure how it does, but I know my school has a pretty long one for kindergarten and first grade. For me, we decided to move back to America when he starts first grade. I’m just not a huge fan on the public school curriculum here. Although, it’s been awhile since I’ve been in an American school, so it could be even worse there.
I’ve heard mixed reports on afterbirth care here. Not the care itself, but one mom who’d spent a lot of time in the US said it was an important feature of Taiwan culture. Another that had lived here all her life said: “what?”, as in she’d never heard of it. Both can afford helpers, the latter is waishenren, no idea on former.
Some light might be needed here. If OP’s 快要是媽媽 may be prone to postpartum, they’ll both appreciate the support from afterbirth care. He more than she.
My kids all taught themselves to read. As long as they have good examples around them, they can do most things independently.
Totally opposite of my experience. My neighbors all act like auntie or uncle towards my kids. They anyways give the younger ones treats or small gifts.
Every kid is different. Some kids if you push it on them too hard they will hate it, and actively rebel.