I posted here not that much off a year ago about ongoing problems in my marriage to a Taiwanese woman and I got a LOT of responses. Well, I’m still in that relationship. In many ways, however, it’s a lot better than it was then - a LOT better. But it’s also very, very far from perfect. We haven’t had sex in over a year now, and we’ve spent most of that time sleeping in separate rooms. I gave up on ever getting our sex life back on track, and from then on things actually got easier. We - mostly - get on pretty well these days. We very rarely have huge humdinger arguments like we used to all the time.
Before you ask - as people always do - why I’m still in this relationship: for the same reason people always are. It’s pair-bonding. Pair-bonding is extremely powerful. If you still don’t get it, either you’ve never been in a truly serious relationship, or you’re too young to know. Don’t get me wrong - I’m deeply frustrated with the way things are, but just walking out the door without a care in the world is not an option at this moment in time.
When we do argue, her strategy is nearly always the same: we don’t have to be married, we can get divorced, I can live on my own and be happy…amongst other, less pleasant things she says.
I would be curious to know what my options actually are if I decided, you know what, I’m out of here (the apartment I share). I don’t really know anyone at all in Taiwan beyond the most casual of acquaintances. Returning to my home country isn’t an immediate option either, because it would entail costs I can’t afford right now. I’d most likely need to find myself some place cheap - but where, and without speaking more than a very few words of Mandarin? Are there any go-to solutions for when you need to get out, and establish a temporary space for, say, a couple of months to keep working and keep your life otherwise on track?
What did other people who’ve been in the same situation do?