I was cleaning house and found a student workbook to learn english that was published in 1991. It has a survey of North Americans called “Love and Marriage in North America” and asked what women and men look for in a partner. Here is the results, from most important to least important…do they still hold true today? Whats your thoughts.
What Women Look For In A Partner
Record of achievement
Leadership qualities
Skilled at his job
Earning potential
Sense of humor
Intelligence
What Men Look For In A Partner
Physical attractiveness
Warmth and affection
Social skills
Homemaking ability
Fashion sense
Sensitivity
This list says to me that women still look at men as a cash machine, while men just want someone to love.
taken from "Interchange; English for international communication. By Jack C. Richards. Cambridge university press.
Have to be able to have a real conversation with her without getting bored. I have to be interested in her. Common interests help with mutual interest, but are not essential. She should just be interesting. So many people are boring and personality-less.
She should look good and have a healthy, normal interest in sex. I don’t mean to be crude but at least half of a relationship is in bed, so that’s important. And by looks good I don’t necessarily mean model quality, but enough to turn me on (or otherwise what’s the point?)
She should be intelligent. I think this is redundant with #1, though.
No major emotional/control freak/insecurity/psycho/just plain bitch issues.
Be basically a decent, moral person with a heart. Maybe this should be #1 instead of #5.
Aren’t these the same basic qualities women look for in a man, too? He should be interesting, good-looking, good in bed, smart, sane, and a good guy. What more do you expect? That’s close to perfection and I doubt I’m ever going to find someone who meets all of the above criteria.
Connection - must be able to feel comfortable being myself around him and for him to feel comfortable being himself around me. This also accounts for being able to talk and pass the time of day in each other’s company.
Physical Attraction - After the spark, there’s got to be some kindling to keep it going. Let’s face it, kids, if he looks like something you’d scrape off a lab floor, all the connection in the world will not make it go beyond a platonic relationship.
Self-Confidence - While this goes without saying, it also makes it easier for him to appreciate himself so that he’s not jealous nor feels the need to impress people with superficial/material attributes
Sexual Skills - not looking for the poolboy from some cheesy porn flick, just someone who knows what he’s doing, but also can take direction and knows himself so that he can guide as well.
Flexible Goals/Ambition - Someone who knows where he wants to go in life, but is willing to bend a little as the situation presents itself.
Change “cash” to “security,” and I think that’s basically right. But I have little faith that that’s an accurate picture today because the message being sent to women these days isn’t so much about being self-sufficient as it is about being whatever the heck you want to be. Some want a man to take care of them, but some want to take care of a man. Some just want sex, and some want women. And some want sex with a women and a relationship with a man. Some want to dominate, and some want to be dominated. Some don’t know what they want.
[quote=“Frost”]I was cleaning house and found a student workbook to learn English that was published in 1991. It has a survey of North Americans called “Love and Marriage in North America” and asked what women and men look for in a partner. Here is the results, from most important to least important…do they still hold true today? Whats your thoughts.
What Women Look For In A Partner
Record of achievement
Leadership qualities
Skilled at his job
Earning potential
Sense of humor
Intelligence
What Men Look For In A Partner
Physical attractiveness
Warmth and affection
Social skills
Homemaking ability
Fashion sense
Sensitivity
This list says to me that women still look at men as a cash machine, while men just want someone to love.
.[/quote]
while men just want someone to love??? please who are you fooling with that line? Look at all the traits they are looking for in a woman. Sound like someone looking for their moma.
Women are looking for stablity, and sometimes some to ‘take care’ of them…The above traits can be found in the ‘alpha’ male, which we are suppose to go after
Nope none of those apply, check out Oprah’s Feb issue of O magazine, which talks heavily about relationships and marriage and such…and I think you will see that BOTH sides have changed
I would take whatever Oprah says with a truckload of salt. I don’t think things have changed to much over the past 10-15 years.
Women still go for money/ability to provide and who can blame them? I would like to have a financial safety net myself, but since I am a male that won’t happen. But Oprah and others are bullshitting when they want to make men believe it’s their personality or whatever that will attract women.
The bum around the corner might have a splendid personality but no women gives him a second glance, while the Donald Trumps of the world have to beat women off with a stick.
I am not blaming women for their priorities, since they make sense to me (starting a family with the bum would be quite a bad move), but I wish women would stop that BS about “I don’t care about his money as long as he is warm/passionate/has a sense of humour blabla”.
Nope none of those apply, check out Oprah’s Feb issue of O magazine, which talks heavily about relationships and marriage and such…and I think you will see that BOTH sides have changed[/quote]
Yeah, once you start quoting Oprah and her magazine, thats when you lose all creditability no matter what.
Nope none of those apply, check out Oprah’s Feb issue of O magazine, which talks heavily about relationships and marriage and such…and I think you will see that BOTH sides have changed[/quote]
Yeah, once you start quoting Oprah and her magazine, thats when you lose all creditability no matter what. [/quote]
I said check it out, I didn’t quote her…But maybe you can’t check it out because you can’t read things that talk about other than stereotypes?
[/quote]
Um…yeah I know, that’s why I posted it, in my first post.
