"Is it better to be kind or be right?" Concrete examples, please

I dunno if I remember exact conversations, but it’s been the same in both office and teaching jobs. Maybe something not typically done, or that they want to do, but I just say why I think it would be helpful, leave it at that.

That said if you’re someone who wants to be direct and expects results because you are, you’re probably gonna get frustrated. I’ve been in many situations where I think something can be improved, I suggest it and get ignored, but it’s not really any skin off my back. But if things get backwards to the point where it’s makes me hate my job, I gotta go.

With backstabbing co-worker/victim types, has happened to me but not a ton. I don’t let them go uncontested if they try something though. I will make sure my account is heard too, to the boss. Basically “Look, my intention was not to upset this person, but in order for me to do my job well, I need x from them, full stop.” A nicer way of saying, if you want to make money please remove this nonsense from my path. That’s it, no further explaining, nice and simple.

So I think your MO here can be to be direct and you can be ok, as long as it’s peppered with consideration and you remain consistent (also assuming you’re a competent, reliable worker). Which is of course different from an MO of walking on glass firstly.

That’s my experience. I’m also fully aware I probably haven’t worked at the worst places in the world, I know truly toxic work environments exist here and not everyone has flexibility with leaving/finding new work. But no doubt if there were a lot more directness encouraged and employed in the workplace, things would be a ton more productive.