[quote=“Stimpy”]I don’t agree that private tutoring is a public enterprise making those who undertake it public figures. I think the central issue here is that OP should have talked to his/her private tutor about issues concerning the classes rather than resorting to posting about it on a public forum-- and a forum made up of the tutor’s peers where the tutor is highly likely to see it, no less.
I don’t think the posts were general. A letter that was going to be sent was posted here for evaluation. There was enough specific information in her post that the tutor was able to figure out s/he was being discussed here.
Central point here is direct communication is much better than the approach taken by OP.[/quote]
The central point is that the OP didn’t know what was appropriate and came here for advice. She clearly is uncomfortable with confrontation and was seeking ways to get her message across without having to have an embarassing conversation. The guy’s peers have no way of knowing that it was him under discussion and he figured it out because the OP gave herself away.
So how is her effort any different from [url=How to comfort people? - #2 by Toasty one[/url]?
[quote]My friend who is American is now suffering the pain of losing his loving mom.
He loves his mom very much.I am very sorry to hear that bad news.He is now in his hometown and dealing with all the stuff.At this moment,what should I say to him? [/quote]
If that’s not discussing something that someone else might not want to advertise then what is? I think it’s acceptable, and you apparently did too.
[quote]I find often my liberal western upbringing clashes somewhat with my gf’s expectation of how a man should behave.[/quote] Pretty personal stuff, don’t you think? No chance of her getting upset for putting words in her mouth or talking about her behind her back?
You’re happy to discuss a school in [url=Challenge: teach two 6y.o. boys, no toys, no games, no books - #2 by Toasty thread[/url] where you say
Why is a freelance teacher any different from a school? Why is it OK for people to talk about the ‘dumb’ things their SO’s say, or how their SO’s behave and think, but not OK to ask how to deal with someone who isn’t keeping up their end of a bargain?
Pointing and saying “Teacher X is no good” would be a bit over the top, but describing a common situation and asking for advice on what you should say to him doesn’t do any harm. You could reasonably tell her off for posting his reply, which is personal correspendence, but I don’t see the harm in her asking “should I say this like this?”
So his feelings get hurt? He needs to grow up. Your feelings would get hurt? You too.