The car driving over my leg and throwing me to the ground on a pedestrian crossing when I had a green light this morning was definitely real, I don’t think I perceived it, as was the non-appearence of the police. Everyone thinks it’s me though, probably why they didn’t bother to turn up.
Ouch…are you ok???
Francis,
Sorry that happened to you. Had something similar happen to me, but escaped injury from the taxi because I jumped off of my bike before he hit it t-bone style.
Your post touches on a point that always slows me down on the “positive” path. Often “positive” advocates fail entirely to acknowledge the negative things that exist. For me, when they do that, they lose credibility, and certainly viability as a source of practical “how to be positive” info. A reasonable solution, IMO, doesn’t come from lack of ability to perceive or a willingness to delude oneself.
I can gladly be influenced much more by someone who has enough experience and good vision to see all the bumps, and yet has some useful method of coping with them.
Hope your leg didn’t get hurt too much.
Seeker4
It’s Year 3 for me in Taiwan, and I’m in a state of limbo at the moment.
Year 1 was exciting, fun and rewarding. Year 2 was exciting, fun and equally rewarding.
Year 3 seems to pale considerably in comparison to the first two years.
I think the predominant factors that have caused the about turn are the ‘stressors’ that come with living in Taiwan - crazy, murderous traffic, air quality (definitely affecting my health), big city living, etc etc. They really seem to have caught up to me now. Taiwan is not exciting for me anymore. Getting around in the traffic is an exercise in self-preservation, as is keeping healthy and ailment-free.
However, I have to take in to account my state of mind, and mental health. Quitting drinking four months ago means I don’t like being in a pub, surrounded by drunks (yes, the foreigners who hit the pubs in my city drink themselves to drunk).
A course of Wellbutrin has mostly stabilized the negative sentiments and anxiety that was welling, after quitting the bottle (drank hard for ten years). Ideally I’d like to discuss my feelings/thougts with a mental health professional.
I find I’m solitary in my free time, and don’t even bother going near pubs or clubs anymore. On the weekends I might hit the pool, or do a bit of shopping. By and large, I’m alone.
This brings me to think I might develop anti-social tendencies if I stay on this course, which I would rather not happen. I’m used to, and enjoy a good chinwag, and doing stuff with my mateys (lost 80% of my mateys when I quit the bottle, as they continued to drink hard). However I’m not one for frivalous small talk, which is all too often the case in the foreign community in my city. Small talk and ferocious gossip.
I get the feeling I’ve outstayed my time here, I find myself daydreaming of travelling, visiting family back home, setting up a business, and generally anything that doesn’t involve Taiwan.
This isn’t an attack on Taiwan, it’s people or the foreigners who have Taiwan their home/base/centre of operations. I’m happy for all of those that are happy here. This is a reflection of how I feel, currently, in Taiwan.
Is it time for me to pull up anchor, and head on outta here? I don’t want to leave Taiwan in six months, hating the place - my time here, by and large, has been, well, fun, exciting and rewarding…
[quote=“seeker4”]
To me, you are not a freak, but a potentially valuable curiosity. I would like to know what allows you to feel that way, so positive about Taiwan? Did it happen naturally and takes no effort to maintain, or do you have some outlook/method that maintains your positive outlook? When you read posts that mention the negative things here, do you see/recognize those things at all, or do you simply see a very different picture?
Seeker4[/quote]
Seeker4, thanks for the message inviting me to respond. And don’t worry, I’m don’t think I’m a freak either. And yes, zealflyer, the monk does come from monkey. Let’s just say I picked the wrong name in high school Spanish.
I am very cognizant of the negative things in Taiwan. Take the air quality - it sucks. Of course it helps that I understand Taipei air quality is particularly bad because it sits in a bowl surrounded by mountains - mountains that still inspire me every time I drive over a bridge or look out my 12th floor balcony. Scooters are certainly a major cause of pollution, but I wouldn’t give mine up in a second. Call me a hypocrite, but I love the mobility, convenience and downright fun of a scooter (it probably helps I have a decent one).
Or what about the ineffectual government and corruption? Yeah, it sucks, and sometimes it causes real hassles, but it also means I can teach two Kindergartens at a school that is still waiting on its license.
Poor drivers do get on my nerve, especially when I’m driving my girlfriend’s car, but, you know what? I used to be a pretty bad driver myself (on my scooter, still am), and bad drivers are a natural condition of a rapidly developing economy. I grew up watching my parents drive - The Taiwanese grew up riding bicycles. And then I remember it is because of Taiwan’s rapid development that I can make a very decent wage and live like a king.
The whole Confucianist way of thinking is very frustrating, and has certainly caused me my biggest problems. I want to be rewarded and noticed on merit, not because of guan xi, and if I feel my kids are getting short changed, I tend to raise a rucus, too often in the wrong setting. But you know what? I cannot change that. I try and teach my kids in such a way that they will respect and value each other, because that is where change will start, but ultimately, the only person I can change is myself.
The truth is that the parts of me that are rubbed wrong by Taiwan’s culture are parts I’m not particularly proud of. I have a temper, which certainly doesn’t go down well. I have a lot of pride, which doesn’t jive with Confucianism at all. The list goes on.
So I have, well I am attempting to, embrace the opportunity to change myself. I don’t want to have a temper or be prideful anyways, and Taiwanese culture gives me lots of chances to practice! 
All that said, the most important thing for me is that most of my friends are Taiwanese. I was really fortunate when I came to Taiwan in that I went to a brand new school (with HESS). Everyone was new - CTs, gua tie, etc, which meant we were all in the same boat. No preexisiting conceptions, cliques. One of the gua tie took the initiative to invite me along to the tea house with them, and they took me to Leo Foo my first week.
I’ve been hanging out with them ever since, and the one that invited me has been my girlfriend for almost two years now, and in two weeks she is coming with me to visit my home in America. It gives you a new perspective, and a new appreciation for Taiwan. Sure I hang out with wyguoren - that’s why we got the pool table! - but I don’t have much time for the foreigner’s who only hang out with each other and spend half their time bitching.
A long post I know, and I also know that Taiwan is not for everyone. And, in a way, I have respect for those that give up and go home. Why torture yourself? But if you’re here, accept the bad, but look for the good. Drink more tea than beer. Make a Taiwanese friend, and respect them, don’t pity them. And most importantly, change yourself, because you can’t change Taiwan.
It’s you.
EDIT: When you do drink beer, drink the good stuff!
Ditto for China.
[quote=“DSN”]
Ditto for China.[/quote]… but at least India has a certain magic.
Ah, I see the China-haters are out now. China’s a big place - wonder how much of it you two have seen?
Right now I feel how I feel when every Taiwanese person I meet tells me Vietnam sucks because they spent a week in some dive in Nha Trang.
God I hate threads like this.
Hey, be fair! Have you read the first few pages? This thread has been overwhelmingly positive, with some excellent, thoughtful comments. Sure, there will be naysayers. Just do what I do and start adding them to your Ignore list! 
Tinpot Terrorist - You ask some very good questions, none of which are easy to answer. Most of us go through stages of being in a solid groove here as well as stages of frustration and head scratching. “What am I still doing here?”
Personally, I’ve found the less-positive stages short-lived. One major reason is the pace of change here. Not just skyscrapers going up and mass transit systems built, but an evident change in the vibe. Some days, I walk down the streets of Taipei and feel like I just arrived. Others, I slip into a back alley and have a chat with a shaved ice laoban, and I feel like I’ve always been here.
But we can all do with a change of pace from time to time. Typically, after a trip abroad, I return feeling re-energized. And every time, I realize just how maddeningly quickly Taiwan is bullet training ahead compared to whatever place I just visited.
One thing that may help get you out of your funk is to participate in non-drinking activities. There are a number of clubs which use these boards to set up meeting times and such. Check some of them out in the Events section.
Monkbent - I like your attitude about “looking for the good”. Solid advice we could all take to heart! Just today I walked by the CKS Memorial Hall. The side on Ai Guo E. Rd has a little plaza with fountains in it. A couple of dozen kids were playing in the water. It brought a big smile to my face, and there are things like that going on all around us!
The problem is, when we’re tired and stressed, it’s hard to see the good. But I think that’s part of the human condition no matter where you are. At least here you can wash away your gloom with a 50 NT bowl of shaved ice.
Is it me or Taiwan? Well, I do think it’s me but I am a miserable bastard most of the time and that might have something to do with it. 
Basically, I can be in a great mood until I hit the traffic. Five minutes on the city streets and I’m shaking my head in disbelief.
I find the older people to be the best toward us western folk. They give me pause sometimes and I do find myself lucky to be regarded with such wonder and amazement.
I dunno…I’m rambling a bit here. Most things in Taiwan are pretty cool: cheap smokes and beer at 7-11; decent, inexpensive food everywhere; cheap apartments fully furnished…paid to play with kids all day.
I know I should learn more Chinese but I still don’t like the fact that the people here must yell at each other from two-feet away so that everyone can hear their conversation, like it or not. It’s like the Taiwanese have a “look at me” complex. So even if I DID know the language better, it might not make things better. I work in an office with 15 other teachers, most of them Chinese and I know there’s more respect for co-workers back home…or is it a respect thing? I dunno…
I love my Chinese gal though, so I know the people here can be kind and loving and thoughful once you get to know them personally…and she doesn’t drive like a horse’s ass. She is the one that keeps me here.
So go figure… :loco:
That’s right, go to some backwards, flea-infested third world hellhole like rural India or rural China, that’ll put things in “perspective”.
“Living in a hovel isn’t so bad. You should try living in a garbage dump, with the flies buzzing around as you sleep in other people’s shit. That’ll put things in perspective. You’ll learn to appreciate this dirty little hovel you call home. Compared to the garbage dump, it’ll seem like the cleanest, calmest place you’ve ever been.”
Wombleton wrote:
[quote]Ah, I see the China-haters are out now. China’s a big place - wonder how much of it you two have seen?
Right now I feel how I feel when every Taiwanese person I meet tells me Vietnam sucks because they spent a week in some dive in Nha Trang.[/quote]
Actually, Wombleton, I lived for a year in China and did as much traveling as I could considering SARS which meant Beijing, where I was based, was completely blocked off from the outside world for the last 3 months of my time there.
And if you squandered as much of your time surfing Forumosa as many others of us do 
, you’d see that I have some good things to say about China, too.
Then perhaps you shouldn’t waste your time replying to them. :loco:
It is easy to blame unfortunate personal circumstances on local culture when you are living overseas.
I rarely meet people from other countries who choose to live in Taiwan for more than a year or two who let cultural differences affect their personal happiness. Most of the seasoned, long-term residents I speak to appreciate the good things about living in Taiwan, recognize the problems with local society, but don’t get too worked up over either one. It’s a maturity that takes time to develop (at least it has for me–I’m still working on it).
Now imagine if I wrote something like that everyday. Or if every forumosan who is enjoying their time in Taiwan wrote about their positive experiences all the time. Talk about boring. 
At any rate, I don’t know if I have much more to add to this discussion. My sentiments have already been echoed throughout this thread. I feel that Taiwan, like any other place, is full of both positive and negative experiences, but just like when Jefferson had returned to Taiwan, you don’t really notice them until you are not a part of them. Just like taxis driving like bats out of hell. I ride in taxis frequently, but some of my friends don’t so they get freaked out when they ride in them. I rarely notice it and sometimes have asked the driver to drive faster if I am running late somewhere.
I think that it’s not a simple case of either/or. There are plenty of bad things in Taiwan. It’s just a matter of how you handle it and how much you let it control you.
My trick to survival is that I refuse to have “I Hate Taiwan” days. I have some “I Hate This Aspect of Taiwan” days, but I never let the negative take over more than a small portion of my overall outlook.
Now imagine if I wrote something like that everyday. Or if every forumosan who is enjoying their time in Taiwan wrote about their positive experiences all the time. Talk about boring.
At any rate, I don’t know if I have much more to add to this discussion. My sentiments have already been echoed throughout this thread. I feel that Taiwan, like any other place, is full of both positive and negative experiences, but just like when Jefferson had returned to Taiwan, you don’t really notice them until you are not a part of them. Just like taxis driving like bats out of hell. I ride in taxis frequently, but some of my friends don’t so they get freaked out when they ride in them. I rarely notice it and sometimes have asked the driver to drive faster if I am running late somewhere.
I think that it’s not a simple case of either/or. There are plenty of bad things in Taiwan. It’s just a matter of how you handle it and how much you let it control you.
My trick to survival is that I refuse to have “I hate Taiwan” days. I have some “I hate This Aspect of Taiwan” days, but I never let the negative take over more than a small portion of my overall outlook.[/quote]
It’s ironic this is in response to me because I feel the exact same way. I don’t have anything against those posting their bad experiences, I just don’t have to read them. That’s all.
My life in Taiwan:
Day 1: I love it
Day 2: I hate it
Day 3: I love it
Day 4: I hate it
Day 5: I love it
Day 6: I hate it
Day 7: I love it
Day 8: I hate it
Day 9: I love it
Day 10: I hate it
Repeat for 10+ years. I can’t give up the roller-coaster
I’ve had the time to think about this since my last post on the thread … for sure it’s Taiwan, not me. 