Newborns are so much work

Taiwan Parenting
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Sitting here with a 1 month old on my chest so her mother can get a couple hours rest. First up-close experience with such a young infant.

Based on my observations this whole baby-having thing is…not very fun. Even holding her makes me nervous. I think I’ll be a lot more comfortable when she finally begins converting from a liquid to a solid, because the floppy neck gives me so much anxiety.

I’ve only been here to help out for an afternoon and I’m already tired. Makes me wonder if I’ll ever be able to handle having a baby of my own. I just can’t believe it. How does everyone do this??

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Life doesn’t get easier. You just get better at it.

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There’s no way to practice for this, though! At least not for the first one.

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You have a baby and you practice. Many people only get the hang of it once the second one shows up.

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Isn’t that what you’re doing right now?

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This shall be your permanent state of mind, from the moment they are born until… they move out?

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I think the concept of a 月子中心 is really awesome because she got to learn a few things from the nurses. She didn’t come home completely without skills or information. They taught both parents the basics. Expensive, though.

That’s true, but I’m still not really getting the full experience. Just doing some babysitting. My cousin won’t let me stay over and suffer through the real deal.

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While you’re in the middle of it it feels like it’s going to go on forever and you’re going to lose your fuckin mind, and then suddenly you wake up and it’s like 2 years later.

Sort of like listening to a Dave Matthews CD.

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They do grow up fast. The other baby in my family turns 1 in just a few weeks.

I guess right now is the most difficult part in terms of just keeping yourself sane and entertained, since they can’t really interact yet. Probably gonna be a few more weeks or a month before we see a smile.

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In a couple of years you will miss the time when they couldn’t talk. The stuff they pick up at Kindergarten…

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Believe me, I’m relishing in the can’t-talk-yet phase. It’s my favorite part. I’m just looking forward to the giggles.

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Take it outside to a public area. Those things are chick magnets.

Kids today! Amateurs.

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Where have you been for the last four weeks?

Seriously, just retrain your big dumb man hands to be more careful. As for the tedium, if you can sit and watch any sport for any length of time, you can cradle a baby on the sofa and not move because he or she fell asleep on your chest. I’m 19 years ahead of you. It’s worth it…the silence…both of them silent at the same time. Treasure that time. It’s finite.

And congrats. :+1:

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Did you read the rest of the post?

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Um…it’s her cousin’s baby. But thanks anyway!

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Sadly I am uninterested in picking up chicks.

I have small deft female hands.

It’s a loaner baby. My cousin’s. She was in the maternity center AKA mommy prison for the first month following birth.

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Oh. Well for anyone who is this is what you do:

  1. Take the baby to, say, a coffee shop where there are women.
  2. At some point I guarantee that one of them will comment on how cute/beautiful etc your baby is.
  3. This is when you reply “Oh she’s not my baby. I’m just looking after her for a friend so her mother can get some rest.”
  4. If you don’t get a date after that you never will.
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I must say, I have never approached a man holding a baby. Mostly because I assume he must already be married and that the baby is a product of that.

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In which case exception to the rule.

Trust me, after the birth of mine I had women approach me left right and center. Obviously I’m a good little husband so I didn’t try to develop the situation, but it’s pretty clear that most women are drawn to babies.

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I did. It was early here in my time and I don’t have to go to work. Using the dull blade today.

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