Ode to your favourite waitress

Discussion Open Forum
1

This is not about restaurants and bars, it’s because of restaurants and bars, and it’s about being nice to people.

My favourite waitress has complained that I’m never nice to her, not in public anyway. (The spankings in private don’t count.) So, could anyone help me out with some wordsmithery??

Oh Jessie
When my table’s messy
er, something

…

I think of you
Whenever I’m blue
And need someone to
Bring me a pint of Bacardi and Coke
er…

That fat git
Thinks I’m a tit
But I’ll never quit
Loving the girl who brings me my steak and kidney pie with mushy peas
And doesn’t always forget the vinegar for my chips
Romantic, isn’t it?

I think the last one has potential to be developed into a real sonnet, probably in the flounder bin. If you have words of your own to loan me, or a waitress of your own to eulogise, then let your inner bard speak out! These girls need love too, you know. It’s Christmas, a time for giving, not just a time to ask for more stuffing.

2

There’s a girl at the Westin’s Starbuck’s who is too cute for words. :bouncy:

3

Extra chips?
No charge for the Guinness?
I love you.

And that’s not, is it?
Why, yes, it IS!

A Marks & Spencer check twill sports jacket.

4

Oh Ploy,
Your black shiny hair and brown dewey eyes,
Your Starbucks uniform stretched taut over your lithe frame…

How magnificent to stroke your back and whisper sweet nothings in your ear…

Bangkok was made sweeter by your presence…
Ill have a caramel Cappucino, large -
hold the sugar

The pain! The pain!
My flight leaves tomorrow…

5

[quote=“sandman”]
A Marks & Spencer check twill sports jacket.[/quote]

:stinkyface:

Bob

6

[quote=“tmwc”]That fat git
Thinks I’m a tit
[/quote]

Aye.

:smiley:

Bob