I like to think that with persistence and time, I can experience a little taste of greatness here and there. It kind of worked out for me with getting a degree in engineering and pursuing a career in a field totally unrelated to what I started off doing, and I think also a bit with middle-distance sports (I was somewhat consistently winning the sprint tri races for my age group a few years ago). But it hasn’t worked out for me in other areas, such as with my Korean and Mandarin. I guess I could give it another shot. It’s actually something I’ve been thinking of lately.
You might enjoy this page:
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Bishop Berkeley (1683-1753) was an Idealist philosopher who maintained there were no material objects, only ideas perceived by minds- including the Mind of God.
James Boswll, Life of Samuel Johnson:
After we came out of the church, we stood talking for some time together of Bishop Berkeley’s ingenious sophistry to prove the non-existence of matter, and that every thing in the universe is merely ideal. I observed, that though we are satisfied his doctrine is untrue, it is impossible to refute it. I shall never forget the alacrity with which Johnson answered, striking his foot with mighty force against a large stone, till he rebounded from it,– “I refute it thus .”
A better expression is found in a pair of limericks:
There once was a man who said “God
Must find it exceedingly odd
The fact that this tree
Continues to be
When there’s no-one about in the Quad.”
Reply (representing Berkeleys actual position)
Dear Sir,
Your astonishment’s odd.
I am always about in the Quad.
And that’s why the tree
Will continue to be
Since observed by
Yours faithfully,
God
If we take in our hand any volume; of divinity or school metaphysics, for instance; let us ask, Does it contain any abstract reasoning concerning quantity or number? No. Does it contain any experimental reasoning concerning matter of fact and existence? No. Commit it then to the flames: for it can contain nothing but sophistry and illusion.”
― David Hume
Oooh wee, the more I am the more I am not. The Grateful Dead covered this in Althea, btw.
Thinking more and more/ about less and less.
Oooh wee.
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I bow wow wow yippy-o yippy-a to the funk
Punk
I put you in my trunk
Like a good fella, I’m a good speller
Yet I get retarded like Hellen Keller
–Funkdoobiest
Funkdoobiest - Wikipedia
I hear the greatness thing a lot. People tend to think, IMO of course, that it is about skill sets and success and goal achieving.
I’m not so sure about that any more. I can pull a piece of time down and stretch it out and accomplish a few things that make my life stable or invisible, and I have. But I have a problem believing that that is my greatness.
Yes, absolutely, if I get what you’re saying. My greatness really ain’t all that great in the grand scheme of things. But I think of life like adult-onset running. Train and train and train, and you’ll get better, but at the end of the day, you can’t even run 100m at the Kenyan runners’ marathon race pace. And even for your age, there are some serious badasses out there. As they say in Mandarin 人外有人，天外有天. Or Korean, 뛰는 놈 위에 나는 놈 있다 뜻（above the guy running is a dude flying).
But maybe that’s what it’s all about: being the best you yourself can be in 2, 3, or 4 areas. I think I’ve done that in about 3 areas, and there are two things I have in my sights to improve on.
We are creative beings. I just keep doing creative stuff. Painting, writing, sketching, reading, thinking, gardening, running, and soon, driftwood carving.
It is when we are not being creative that we get sad. It is when we think we cannot do something we want to do, we feel worthless.
I don’t need to be good at anything. There is zero pressure on me to be anything.
We have these big brains that make us like this. It’s sad that we have been trained to do the bare minimum to get by, earn our keep so to speak and live with a roof over our head and be socially productive.
This forum is an example of that society and tbh I’d be the first person on the alien ship outta dodge. 
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“It is hard enough to remember my opinions, without also remembering my reasons for them!”-Nietzsche
I remember having an impassioned argument with a friend, where I was defending the Supreme Court’s ruling to have a minimum distance to clear out public sidewalk distances from protesters so women could safely access abortion clinics, when I stopped suddenly and said “Wait, what’s my position on this? Hang on, you’re right, this is an outrageous violation of free speech” (I’ve since changed my mind back).
Reminder to self- think twice, post once.
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Yeah, people asking for proof of why I believe something can eat me. It’ll never be good enough if they’re looking to disagree.
Mike Tyson says, when asked about why he tattooed his face responded: fuck you, it’s my face.
I like that. 
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