In a follow up report on the earlier arrest and charging today of errant Segue poster “Fox”, 23 of Beitou by Senior Constable Soddom, Segue reporter and columnist Snoop followed the Divisional van that took Fox off to the Language Exchange archives where he has filed this report.
The shocking revelations today that Webiquette Police Senior Constable Soddom exercised more than an appropriate level of brutality whilst arresting and charging a young female Segue poster, Fox, have shocked the small Segue cyber community. Once charged, Fox in a somewhat harsh and as yet unexplained detainment was removed from Webiquette Headquaters and incarserated in Cyberia. We were able to secure an exclusive interview on her current circumstance in the Language Exchange forum.
Snoop: “Tell us in you own words what’s it like back here in the Language Exchange archives?”
Fox: “It smells. Like it really smells bad back here. I don’t want to speak poorly of all these lost souls without friends or the ability to afford a language teacher, but it’s a fatuous place and nothing changes. Though I have met a nice guy called Creed1978. He kept on asking me how to say sit still and can you just turn your head a little more to the right in Chinese. I said oh that’s easy Senior Constable Soddom, that bastard, just taught me that today. But he didn’t say it as kindly as you Creed.”
Snoop:“If it’s not too frightening an experience for you to recall could you allow our readers to have your side of the story on what exactly occured today in Webiquette Headquaters?”
Fox:“Well it’s a little hard for me to even think about it. He was a brute and a bastard and all the while I had this errie feeling there were more eyes watching me through that double mirror thing. He asked me lots of spelling questions like how do you spell usurp and argument? It was frustrating and he knew he had me. But it wasn’t that that really bothered me. It was the other stuff.”
Fox:“He’s a prick. He’s your typical cop pig and I told him. He wouldn’t let up about why it is that all posters must follow appropriate Webiquette. I said well what is appropriate Webiquette and what did I do wrong? He said some people just crap on on these forums and it’s my job to read 'em and it makes me mad as hell when I see a post out of it’s appropriate thread or of a content that might be somewhat over my head, or boorish, or polite, or arrogant, or well thought out, or in keeping with the times or thrashed to death or whatever. You get my meaning I’m Senior Constable Soddom and your arse is mine!”
Snoop:“And I guess the question all our readers are dying to hear the answer to is: what happened then?”
Fox:“Well all the while on the table was this large brown paperbag with a photofit likeness of George Bush sketched on it. He…he…he cuffed my hands to the back of this chair put the bag over my head with the image facing him and pulled down my new Lees and Calvins and I can’t tell you whether it was his police batten or his own god awful thing, but he kept saying give me a taste of that chocolate star George you rogue, you rogue, you rogue…as he well you know the bastard.”
Snoop:“We’re all sorry to hear that Fox. What a slime bag! Why do you think they have detained you down here in the archives anyway?”
Fox:“He said that was only a taste of what he and the other pigs at Webiquette have got in store for me…He’s a bastard …and it was that he didn’t like the spin I put on that George Bush oily argument thing.”
At this stage folks I’m sorry we were unable to continue our interview with Fox as she was about to receive council from another well known Segue personality Richard Hartzel.