So I was talking to my girlfriend last night about engagements, and according to her, if you ask a girl to marry you in Taiwan, and give her an engagement ring, that doesnt mean you are 定婚 engaged. I don’t really believe her, and she wasn’t able to really explain it to me, so if anyone can shine some light on the topic, or call her out on that bs, I’m all ears.
Parents have to meet each other. Be a bit careful because if that’s the way she thinks you might be marrying her family.
“Engagement” means a particular ceremony, which is often performed in conjunction with the wedding itself. Even in the West, the word is ambiguous–it could either mean when you decide to get married, when you announce that you’re getting married, or when you set the date.
Um…
She has to say yes.
Engaged can mean already signed the papers but haven’t done the ceremony yet.
The “wedding” ceremony (big dinner) can be a year or longer after actual marriage.
People are married before the wedding ceremony. The wedding ceremony is just a party for family and friends and official “coming out” as married.
Culture difference. In Taiwan, engagement usually has a ceremony of it’s own. Very similar to a wedding.
I wish you all the best but since you are writing this, are you sure you want to marry a woman you don’t trust and can’t communicate with? Also have you considered marrying abroad instead of in Taiwan? If you saw my thread about the spouse missing, or any of the other threads on here, you get screwed pretty hard here with their ancient laws if anything goes bad.
Ours was the other way around. Will Jesus ever forgive us?
Buddha would.
Haha, I don’t believe her because she doesn’t know much about relationships, not because I think she’s lying. We can communicate just fine
So hypothetically, I could get a JFRV to live with a fiancé?
I don’t know anything about the circumstances of your relationship, but are you sure you are communicating well or are you just under the impression that you are? Or does can mean at times but not all the time?
It’s not uncommon for people to start before they have the wedding.
It may have been even been talked about in the forumosa.
It is obvious that engagement means different things for both of you. Talk it out with her.
Also differentiate between being married (legally) and having had a wedding (ceremony).
Wedding ceremonies have a special status here. Hope for a modern thinking in-laws & fiancée or you will have to part with a lot of cash. Unfortunately many Taiwanese would go in debt to have a lavish wedding party.
BTW
Statistically the bigger the wedding party the more likely a divorce is coming.
Fun Fact:
In Taiwan you can get a marriage certificate that is for a wedding in the future.
That blew officials mind in Germany because the marriage certificate was issued on a date before the date of the marriage. Marryception.
Well, in other countries you can get married by proxy, so why not allow distance in time as well as space?
You are officially engaged until the engagement party, and before that party there’s a whole bunch of “traditions” you have to follow. The air-quotes around the traditions indicates that most Taiwanese have no idea what the traditions actually are, and makes stuff up to fit they agenda.
Although the law doesn’t require an engagement before registering as married, once you have one (referred to as an 婚約 in the Marriage Act), by not fulfilling it, you are required to pay for monetary damages.
oh great. I guess that is one more thing I might have to pay for (in the middle of a divorce if you saw my spouse is missing thread).
well, the other party has to show up and prove you are the one that refused to fulfil the details of the engagement.
Awesome, that works great for me. I never refused anything, especially since I had no clue about it at the time. Would like to see them prove anything. Thanks.
Here in Taiwan, engagement traditionally involves customs like an official announcement and giving boxes of ridiculously overpriced, blah-tasting cookies by 女兒紅 to family, friends and co-workers. Anything besides that brand is looked down on as “being cheap”.
It’s not like in the West, where it just means that a proposal and an acceptance have been made.
Don’t forget the exchanging of gold rings and necklaces. Giving out giant money baskets. After it’s all over everyone gives it back usually or fights over it. Such a disgusting part of the culture here.