Please post the crazy conversations that you have daily with people!
11/7 10:45PM at Wellcome
Taike Teenager to friend (mandarin): I wonder if that guy over there is a foreigner…
Friend (mandarin): Of course he’s a foreigner.
Taike (mandarin): I really want to ask him if he’s a foreigner, but my english is bad.
Friend (mandarin): It’s not a definite thing that he speaks english…but he’s definitely a foreigner, what a stupid question.
Mike (mandarin): I’m obviously a foreigner.
Taike (english): You can speak Chinese?
Mike (mandarin): Why would you want to ask me if I’m a foreigner? You’re friend is right, that is a stupid question. (Friend begins laughing at him)
Taike (english): Oh! Where do you from?
Mike (english): New York ( ), ok, I’m going home now, bye! begins leaving
Taike to friend (mandarin): Wow, I really want to be friends with him, I don’t have any foreign friends.
Friend (mandarin): Bai chi!!
I’m from “Long Island” because nobody knows what a “Rhode Island” is. Americans don’t even know where Rhode Island is. That, or I just say Boston. Or Italy. Or France. Or Egypt. Or Xinjiang. Or wherever I feel like being from in that moment. :discodance:
I once had a friend from Rhode Island, but he thought it just wasn’t Scituate’d right, so he just told everyone he was from Bum Fuck, Egypt. What’s this got to do with locals, anyway?
Not ridiculous, but rather “cute”: One of the families at my kids’ school came over for a play and afternoon tea. Their mom does the paper recycling in our area to support her kids. Anyway, they were here for a couple of hours before she finally got the courage to ask me, “How much did your husband pay for you? Could you help us find another NZer willing to come over and marry my brother, and could we save some money doing it that way?” I had no idea where to try to start to explain things to her.
God, I knew it was going to happen. People used to bitch about being mistaken for English teachers, and I warned them that it was better than what was coming - being mistaken for mail-order brides.
OTOH, you probably could find the guy someone, if he was willing to pay.
As for the OP’s conversation, I’ve had Taiwanese people ask me if I was a foreigner many times. They usually mean, “Are you American?” - because I am obviously not of Taiwanese or Chinese ethnic background. My personal favorite is when they argue with me:
Taxidriver: Where are you from?
Me: Canada.
Taxidriver: I knew you couldn’t be American. What language do people speak in Canada? Canadian or American?
Me: They speak English. So do Americans.
Taxidriver: No they don’t.
[quote]Taxidriver: I knew you couldn’t be American. What language do people speak in Canada? Canadian or American?
Me: They speak English. So do Americans.
Taxidriver: No they don’t.[/quote]
And he’s right
But yeah, that is an absolutely classic bit of taxi-driver-speak.
I drive a rather old car. I pulled into a gas station in my area, wound the window down…and all the young staff yelped and hid behind the gas pumps. The old boss came over and asked them what was up. They told him they were afraid of the foreigner because they had to speak English. He gave them a rather impatient look and grunt, walked over and said, “They are all afraid they have to speak English to you. I knew anyone driving an old dump of a car like would have to speak Chinese. What do you need?”
Offended or amused, the choice was mine. I laughed all the way home.
[quote=“asiababy”]I drive a rather old car. I pulled into a gas station in my area, wound the window down…and all the young staff yelped and hid behind the gas pumps. The old boss came over and asked them what was up. They told him they were afraid of the foreigner because they had to speak English. He gave them a rather impatient look and grunt, walked over and said, “They are all afraid they have to speak English to you. I knew anyone driving an old dump of a car like would have to speak Chinese. What do you need?”
Offended or amused, the choice was mine. I laughed all the way home.[/quote]
This is such a great story from so many aspects, a sociologist could pick this apart for years. Young people, old people, different cultures, yet familiarity of these different cultures from previous experiences that were probably affected from world events, different experiences, over periods of time, communication challenges, economics, perceptions…
Oh God. I’ve been getting that look lately. ‘Why are you in Taiwan?’ ‘I’m married.’ ‘… Where are you from?’ ‘England.’ ‘England?!’
It took me a few tries to realize that they thought I must be mail order bride, and couldn’t believe that English people would be poor enough. Because, you know, all English people live in mansions on private estates surrounded by manicured gardens and antique furniture. (Actually, thinking about it, I think English people won the stereotype lottery here).
I think I’m going to have to change it to ‘I’m a translator’. I don’t want people thinking my husband can’t pick up.
[quote=“bababa”]
As for the OP’s conversation, I’ve had Taiwanese people ask me if I was a foreigner many times. They usually mean, “Are you American?” - because I am obviously not of Taiwanese or Chinese ethnic background. My personal favorite is when they argue with me:
Taxidriver: Where are you from?
Me: Canada.
Taxidriver: I knew you couldn’t be American. What language do people speak in Canada? Canadian or American?
Me: They speak English. So do Americans.
Taxidriver: No they don’t.[/quote]
Bloke on the road (a while ago): Where are you from?
Me: England.
Him: England?
Me: Yes, England.
Him: Not America?
Me: Do I look fat?
Him: OK. England. …Do you still speak English?
O.o;;;;;
‘Do I look fat?’ is usually the response to the persisted ‘American?’ comments. It shuts people up really quick, they don’t quite know what to say! No offense intended to Americans!
[quote=“tsukinodeynatsu”]
Bloke on the road (a while ago): Where are you from?
Me: England.
Him: England?
Me: Yes, England.
Him: Not America?
Me: Do I look fat?
Him: OK. England. …Do you still speak English?
O.o;;;;;
‘Do I look fat?’ is usually the response to the persisted ‘American?’ comments. It shuts people up really quick, they don’t quite know what to say! No offense intended to Americans![/quote]
HAHA I get somewhat of the reverse a lot.
“You’re not American…you’re too skinny! You don’t look like an American…why don’t you have blue eyes and blonde hair?”
“I’m a mix of six different nationalities, but my Dad’s family comes from Italy.”
“SIX?!”
“Do you realize that ‘American’ is not an ethnicity? We are a country full of immigrants that mix together. There are Chinese people that are American, right?”
“…but they are still Chinese.”
This thread is gold. I can’t top what’s already been written, but here are a couple of my favorites.
September 2008, somewhere between Taichung and Caotun:
Me (on my bike): Excuse me, how can I get to Puli?
Old guy sitting on the curb: 埔里？很遠ㄟ。
Me: That’s OK, as long as I go in the right direction, I’ll get there eventually.
Old guy: 很遠ㄟ。
Me: Well, am I going in the right direction?
Guy: Yes. Keep going up this road for a while, then ask for directions from there.
Me: OK, thanks…
Guy: 很遠ㄟ！
In a cab, sitting in traffic on Tiding Dadao in Neihu:
Me: I don’t like this road. You know why? Because they don’t let us scooter riders ride on it! If I want to get to Jilong Road from here, I have to take a huge detour.
Driver: 台灣設計路的人真的很王八蛋。王八蛋你聽得懂嗎？
[quote=“tsukinodeynatsu”]Bloke on the road (a while ago): Where are you from?
Me: England.
Him: England?
Me: Yes, England.
Him: Not America?
Me: Do I look fat?[/quote]
What if he answers, “Yes.”
[quote=“Impaler”][quote=“tsukinodeynatsu”]Bloke on the road (a while ago): Where are you from?
Me: England.
Him: England?
Me: Yes, England.
Him: Not America?
Me: Do I look fat?[/quote]
What if he answers, “Yes.”[/quote]
Random guy sitting in store where I am buying a drink: Hey you!
Me: Who?
Random: You!
Me: Yes… (tripidation)
Random: Where are you from, you’re not American, I know it, I know it!
Store Owner (impressed): How do you know she’s not American?
Random (already triumphant): She’s too … short!
Unsolicited Advice #1:
A lady comes to my house to pick up some stuff we are selling online. My daughter is quite young and I am not in shape. Lady picks up stuff, hands over money, and then…
Jumps down on to the floor and starts to show me exercises I can do to get my figure back, and calls my motherinlaw over to tell her what medicine she needs to buy me right NOW or I will be lost forever to the curse of a FAT STOMACH, which she does whilst clutching my stomach in her hands for dramatic effect. Suddenly, she stops, puts on her shoes, says thank you very much for the goods, and walks quietly out the door. My motherinlaw stand looking at each other in disbelief, then laugh so hard we cry.
Oh, I love Yahoo Auction.
#2:
It’s about the car again…
As I get out of my car, the recycling guy comes past slowly on his tricycle, stops right beside me, looks hard, starts to pedal off, but turns to yell, “Hey you! What are you doing driving such a crap car? You Americans are supposed to drive BMW’s!”
), ok, I’m going home now, bye! begins leaving
