Seeking friends or relationship - Gay

Taipei is my home town and I am a Taiwanese gay guy. After staying and studying few years in Europe, really hope to make friends with some gay men from foreign countries staying in or visiting Taiwan currently. Having a coffee chat is a perfect start!

Where to know them possibly? Any website or bar recommended?

PM is welcome.

[modquote]Moderator’s Note: I have combined all the posts for finding friends/dates/relationships, into one thread. Any similar, future, posts will be merged into this thread.[/modquote]

[quote=“cuddlyoriental”]Taipei is my home town and I am a Taiwanese gay guy. After staying and studying few years in Europe, really hope to make friends with some gay men from foreign countries staying in or visiting Taiwan currently. Having a coffee chat is a perfect start!

Where to know them possibly? Any website or bar recommended?

PM is welcome.[/quote]

Your awesome username is a pretty good start. :thumbsup:

Gracias…The chief

[quote=“cuddlyoriental”]Taipei is my home town and I am a Taiwanese gay guy. After staying and studying few years in Europe, really hope to make friends with some gay men from foreign countries staying in or visiting Taiwan currently. Having a coffee chat is a perfect start!

Where to know them possibly? Any website or bar recommended?

PM is welcome.[/quote]
Here’s a start: Gay.com
And there’s this group on CouchSurfing.org: 臺灣 同志 LGBT/ Queer Taiwan

didn’t know there was a gay group in CS! thanks for this info

[quote=“cuddlyoriental”]Taipei is my home town and I am a Taiwanese gay guy. After staying and studying few years in Europe, really hope to make friends with some gay men from foreign countries staying in or visiting Taiwan currently. Having a coffee chat is a perfect start!
Where to know them possibly? Any website or bar recommended?
PM is welcome.[/quote]

Where in Europe were you?

manhunt.net has plenty of foreigners, and the Red House area near Ximen MRT is a good place for a drink (actually, one of the better places to sit and have a drink ANYWHERE, as far as I’m concerned). Lots of foreigners go to Dalida (the smallest bar at the end); if you went there with your Taiwanese friends a few times the bar staff would probably introduce you to some of the other regulars if you asked.

If you want to meet foreigners in a club, Refresh, near Guting MRT, is probably a good choice, though expensive. You could also go to Funky – not as many foreigners, but those there might be more likely to be able to speak Chinese.

Many thanks for all of yours replies.

I will try the information you provided and hope to make some friends.

:slight_smile:

Do you think that when you were studying in Europe, it would be easier to find your gay friends? It’s like you have more options. But in Taiwan, gay westerners are rare. They can be more difficult to make friends with.

The gay area. Ximen Ding, Hong Lo…

Hi guys

I’m a 27 years old Taiwanese male,
feminine , skinny, long haired

I’m physically a boy, no surgeries, no hormones.

I don’t live as a woman, but I’d like to think of myself passable.
I tend to be unisex,
tho considered feminine in most people’s eyes.
I sometimes appear more feminine , wear neutral clothes and makeups etc.

I find all races attractive , but it’s easier and stronger for me to get attracted to white guys.

I think it’s fair to say that feminine males are not what the majority of gay community goes for,
and it’s the same everywhere.

But it seems to me that no one wants feminine males in Taiwan.
(I know asian males genereally appear more feminine in westerners’ eyes, but I mean relatively even more feminine.)
I have never met any Taiwanese guy who likes me romantically.

I only meet people who are interested in me on the internet,
and they’re all in other countries.

Last year I moved to Taipei from other city in Taiwan,
and started meeting guys,
but they’re either visiting here or married.
So all that just ended up as encounters,
none of them can develop anything.

All that is just so frustrating.
Coz what I want the most is a relationship,
and I can’t expect that from them.

Tho at first I thought I could have some fun while on the road to find my own man,
but later I was surprised to learn that even finding someone regular for sex isn’t that easy either.

Tho occasionally I see foreigners when I go to bars/clubs,
they seem interested in regular boys who either masculine or boyish,
not someone like me.

I never did the first move when it comes to in person,
even on the internet, I rarely be the one who sends the first message.
It’s just not my style, I don’t wanna appear as someone who jumps on every guy he sees.
and I think I’m not really that confident person,
I like more typical type of guy, which is harder to tell if the guy is gay or if he’s interested in me.

and also I seriously worry that I might get pounched in the face
if I hit on some homophobia guy.

So basically,
nothing happens in my lovelife,
if there’s anything,
they’re just encounters, nothing meaningful or potential.

I just wonder if anyone can give me some advices,
coz I think I’m a good person, I have a job,
not that I’m saying I’m a supermodel, but some people find me attractive.

I just feel very depressed and frustrated that I can’t even meet guys for dating,
it’s like I don’t even have the chance,
I often wonder that if there’s something wrong with me
or I just don’t know some tricks to find someone.

Sorry for this long post,
I just thought it would help if I offer more information about me and the whole situation.

Welcome to Forumosa! :slight_smile:

People have trouble finding a partner even if they are in the most common group that is looking for love. As soon as you eliminate 95?% of the population (looking for same sex) or especially if you are looking for an effeminate, gay, white guy in Taiwan ( that would eliminate 99.999?% of the population), I think you need to focus on the Internet or gay bars. The chances that you’d just happen to run into Mr. Right are just too small without an active search with real focus.

Don’t worry about being shy. That is common and endearing to many. I wish I had more/better advice for you, but hopefully others with more knowledge will come around soon.

Good luck! :thumbsup:

Love your positive response Zender!

Houzeboy, what you’re looking for is not mainstream at all- of course it’ll be a little bit hard! This is not a reflection on you or a failure on your part. It just means you’ll have to cast a wider net to find exactly what you’re looking for. And in a world full of incredibly complex and unique sexual preferences, I bet there is someone out there dreaming, wishing, yearning to find a guy exactly like you.

I think it’s really easy to get into a habit of thinking “Nobody will ever like me because I’m not _____.” or “Everybody wants _____, so I’ll never find love because I don’t have _____.”
It’s really this line of thinking that’s problematic- it will get you in a headspace where you are expecting to be rejected. People pick up on that, and I think that they figure, “well, Houzeboy knows himself better than I do, so if he thinks I should reject him, there must be a reason.”
Your fixation on rejection comes out in your mannerisms, gestures and actions, which pushes them more toward rejection. I think what you’ve got to do is build yourself up a little bit. Cast a wider net, get out there on the interwebs (it doesn’t sound like you’re the bar type) and start corresponding. Be really specific about who you are and what you want. I bet you find someone quick :wink:

Also listen to Dan Savage of the Savage Lovecast. Can’t tell you how much listening to him every week has opened up my mind about what’s out there in terms of sexual preferences :wink: plus it’s just fun to listen to!

I would add: just be who you really want to be, and let the things happen. Of course, not everyone will be interested in you, but the point is to attract the people that will like you for who you are :slight_smile:

And I would suggest not to focus on a specific type of people (“foreigner”). Just meet the guy for who they are, taiwanese or foreigner, everyone is different. If you have too much expectation on your partner, then you will never find him, because he only exist in your head :slight_smile: And the fun part of meeting people is to discover them and to be surprised.

Thank you guys for the comments.

I do think it’s better to be myself,
and that’s why I am the way I am now , tho can be tough sometimes.
But I want to meet someone who likes me for who I am for sure.

Not that I only want white guys, which sounds kinda racist lol
but like I said,
even I find all races attractive, I get attacted to white guys much more, it’s just my natural preference.
and I don’t meet any Taiwanese guys are into me either,
However, I do keep it open.

I just think that if I have a man, I can make him very happy on many levels,
but feel frustrated that it seems like no one wants to be the man,
especially when I don’t even get to date or meet potential guys.

I barely meet any live-in-Taiwan white guys who are single,
but keep running into married ones.

Sometimes I wonder if there is somewhere or some ways to meet guys
who like someone like me.

a super feminine asian male, sounds cool

the problem, as usual, is that you dont make the first move
if you actively pursue 0% of the time, you will fail 100% of the time, right?

and

you have to actively pursue to meet people, in order for them to get to know you deeply. they cannot know your qualities just from seeing you, or from how you dress, or from how you are standing in the room. have to make the first move.

[quote=“heynow”]a super feminine Asian male, sounds cool

the problem, as usual, is that you dont make the first move
if you actively pursue 0% of the time, you will fail 100% of the time, right?

and

you have to actively pursue to meet people, in order for them to get to know you deeply. they cannot know your qualities just from seeing you, or from how you dress, or from how you are standing in the room. have to make the first move.[/quote]

You’ve got a point and I do agree with you.

It’s just…
I really don’t wanna appear as someone who is too aggressive,
or even some desperate slut that jumps on every single guy.

I would like to do it smoothly and with class if I did,
but I do not know how to hit on someone or make the first move AT ALL.

I’m actually wishing that I could have someone to teach me how to do it.

Hi, I’m Ryan from Taipei, Taiwan.
20 yo, sophomore, love to make new friends.

Actually, I’m gay. I wanna meet guys and find long-term relationship.
I’m not so tall( in fact 173cm height ) but with kindness and passion.
Humorous, easygoing, active, kind of cute and the most important, desire-to-be-loved hahaha :sunglasses:

tho there’s zero experience for me, I would like to strive my love path.

sometimes I just lie on my bed,holding pillows, imagined that if one day someone can hug me from the back then kiss me gently,
or we walked along the seashore, sharing our life to each other, that will be so awesome. isnt it?
We can hang out, see movies, have fun together!

thefore, if you are interested, add my skype or pm me( ID:ryan333_www) :laughing:

Please don’t take offense, but I have to tell you that CCR is Chinglish. Most people have no idea what it means. :slight_smile:

really, so wht should I call it in English?

btw thanks for ur correction :slight_smile:

can anyone introduce some guys to chat and meet :slight_smile: