[quote=“sandman”]The man’s dead, so it seems churlish to continue to pillory him – until you remember just what a nasty fucker he was. Thanks to the NYT for reminding me. Truly one of the slimeballs of history. A disgusting shite of a man.
This song describes that murdering peice of crap quite nicely, with apologies to nice South Africans, of which there are of course many – not just Breyten Breytenbach.
[quote]I’ve Never met A Nice South African - sung by Spitting Image
I’ve travelled this old world of ours from Barnsley to Peru
I’ve had sunshine in the arctic and a swim in Tinbuktu
I’ve seen unicorns in Burma and a Yetti in Nepal
And I’ve danced with ten foot pygmies in a Montezuma hall
I’ve met the King of China and a working Yorkshire miner
But I’ve never met a nice South African.
No he’s never met a nice South African
And that’s not bloody surprising man
'Cause we’re a bunch of arrogant b***tards
Who hate black people
I once got served in Woolies aften less than four week’s wait
I had lunch with Rowan Atkinson when he paid and wasn’t late
I know a public swimming bath where they don’t piss in the pool
I know a guy who got a job straight after leaving school
I’ve met a normal merman and a fairly modest German
But I’ve never met a nice South African.
No he’s never met a nice South African
And that’s not bloody surprising man
'Cause we’re a bunch of talentless murderers
Who smell like baboons
I’ve had a close encounter of the twenty-second kind
That’s when an alien spaceship disappears up your behind
I got directory enquiries after less than forty rings
I’ve even heard a decent song by Paul McCartney’s Wings
I’ve seen a flying pig in a quite convincing wig
But I’ve never met a nice South African.
No he’s never met a nice South African
And that’s not bloody surprising man
'Cause we’re a bunch of ignorant loudmouths
With no sense of humour - ha ha
I’ve met the Loch Ness monster and he looks like Fred Astaire
At the BBC in London he’s the chief commissionaire
I know a place in Glasgow which is rife with daffodillies
I met a man in Katmandu who claimed to have two willies
I’ve had a nice pot noodle but I’ve never had a poodle
And I’ve never met a nice South African.
No he’s never met a nice South African
And that’s not bloody surprising man
Because we’ve never met one either
Except for Breyten Breytenbach and he’s emigrated to Paris. (farts)
Yes he’s quite a nice South African
And he’s hardly ever killed anyone
And he’s not smelly at all.
That’s why they put him prison. [/quote][/quote]
Ah yes. A classic ditty; I remember it well. Also on Spitting Image was the scene when a bunch of black men burst into the bedroom of P.W. Botha (and wife) brandishing knives. They then burst into song with a modified version of the English Country Life butter ad. jingle and it went like this: “You’ve never put a better bit of Botha on your knife”.
Where will he be buried? I need a piss.
Bob