Split infinitive

Well editors can only spend so much time fixing sentences up. That was a quick fixer upper! (from someone who used to do a lot of this). The sentence is too long winded and you are trying to say too much in one sentence.

I would say him being British has nothing to do with him not liking split infinitives, most english speakers like me have absolutely no idea what a split infinitive is!

How about, “We be some localizing motherfuckers. Give me a dollar!..Two if you got it.”

OK Chainsmoker, I give the NT$1,000 to you – yours is far more worthy.

“Being a Chinese Language Localizer and the supply chain in CCJK partnership we have internally built a quality-assured project and management skills with years of experiences on localizing business-critical products.”

Ax, they’re right. The sentence sucks. Sandman’s version is an improvement, but it still sucks. What the hell is a Chinese Language Localizer? And supply chain? Reminds me of food chain. I’m assuming your readers know what a CCJK partnership is, but I sure don’t. Internally built, as already noted, is obscure. What does it mean: we designed all aspects of the project? Forget quality-assured. Why not defect-free or high-quality or something closer to English? Jesus, Ax, the whole thing is awful. Too much jargon. That’s the problem. That last phrase about “localizing business-critical products” especially sucks. The whole thing would be better if written in English. Sorry. I won’t even charge for my counsel.

[quote=“ax”]Here’s the rewrite we did last night with 6 heads:

“XXX is a Chinese localizer and a vital service provider in the the CCJK market. We have acquired impeccable project management skills from years of working knowledge and experience in the localization industry.”

ax[/quote]

I would change the ‘from’ to ‘through’ here:

“We have acquired impeccable project management skills through years of …”

and “working + knowledge” aren’t word partners unless there’s an ‘of’ attached. (A working knowledge OF something)
See the cobuild concordance
I would get rid of it all together as it means “experience” so the phrase ends up awkward sounding and redundant.

So sentence 2: We have acquired impeccable project management skills through years of experience in the localization industry.

Fredericka’s one is the best by far, but in real life I would never offer that, unless I was going to be the last person to see it before it went to press and was prepared to take some HEAVY shit for screwing with the layout.
In most of my jobs, cutting five lines down to one, while easy and correct, would mean a whole fugging morning explaining it to some dickhead manager… and how many publicity brochures in any language smile on brevity? None that I’ve seen. MT, you don’t know what Chinese-language localization is? Or supply chain?

Thanks for the link to cobuild concordancer bimmel san…

@Sandmand

Good point! Sure I know what a supply chain is, which we are not, we are only part of that chain. But hence, I was trying to accomodate chinese speaker who voiced her idea to me and want it to be properly written in English. Further, she likes that damn jargon “supply chain” and want right in the mission statement.
Well, I did my best, and you see the best of me a hell of mess as MT pointed out…

ax

[quote]Further, she likes that damn jargon “supply chain” and want right in the mission statement.
[/quote]

And that just proves my point! The true skill of an editor here is the art of persuading the writer that he/she should totally revise their entire work, WITHOUT making them lose so much face that they might not pay you! Its a fine line, especially when most of the time you’re dealing with morons, no matter what language they’re trying to work in.

I remember reading a forum in Salon on the use of split infinitives. One clever fellow argued that infinitives cannot be split because an infinitive is the base verb form, not the “to…” verb form." In other words “run” is an infinitive form, not “to run.”

The only way to split an infinitive would be in a sentence such as the following:

I a - fucking -gree he’s a dickhead.

I can’t agree more…I may lose face, but my superiour shan’t…
otherwise I’ll be in trouble.

ax

OK. I am flummoxed.
Is Ax supposed to be an editor? Nothing personal, but even the Taiwan News would give you the bum’s rush. Six people came up with that “sentence”? Well, all I can say to you guys is don’t give up your day jobs… :cry:

Hi Ax

I think it’s nice that you have your photo up there on the forum. I missed that in Saudi Arabia. The"split infinitive thing", however, is odd. Captain Kirk also got it wrong: “To boldly go where no man has gone before.” He made an error here ( the stupid idiot).

The sentence you presented doesn’t have a “split infinitive” as such, why don’t you ask the Iraqi experts, since they do know it all?

PS. I still think you are handsome and I enjoy your posts.

Duncan

Big Dunc and Ax…maybe you two should get a room, eh? :wink:

When Zefram Cochrane said it 130 years before Kirk he said “to go boldly” But Kirk got to snog green alien babes, so he must have got something right.

Hi boys!

I am sorry if I came across too strong – especially Wolf. I meant that Ax is a genuinly nice man. I like you too.

Sorry Wolf (I hope I spelled it correctly) , I am not available this weeekend as you PMed me this afternoon – you Gestapo lover you!

And no! I will not pretend I am a WHO spanking master for 350 Bhat. I just learned that Bhat is a Thai currency! Gosh! I learn so much from you and Tigerman. Thank you.

PS. Where is that Joker Tigermouth and his uneducated 666 buddy? I am still waiting for them to go beyond the sentence level in our composition group.

Bye Bye Duncan

My short name is: “Dunc” ( my friends call me Duncan – that means: “Dunc + can”, as in “can do things”, it is said with a “K"sound” after my homestay in Edinburgh). I hope to get my own webpage up soon, . . . please stay posted (informed) for political updates.

Duncan

[quote=“Big Dunc”]
My short name is: “Dunc” ( my friends call me Duncan – that means: “Dunc + can”, as in “can do things”, it is said with a “K"sound” after my homestay in Edinburgh).[/quote]

Oops. We thought you had just forgotten an “e.” :laughing:

HA! :laughing:
Jeff, I think that’s called a “slam Dunc!”